It was bad enough to be awakened by DH at 5 am today as he was readying to head out to do some volunteer work, but I finally fell back asleep. Did not appreciate getting texts, from 2 different people, at 6 and 6:30 am today. My phone is charged in my bedroom and I do keep it nearby for emergencies (I am always on call). I cannot silence it or stick it elsewhere. There is no need to text at that hour on a Sunday morning. No, I cannot put it somewhere else. Just don’t text unimportant stuff at that hour. Maybe I’ll text you at 2 am…
So sorry lovely cat but I just don’t want to deal with allergies for the next 10-20 years so we have to say goodbye. It was great having you for two weeks but waking me at 6 am by trying to climb on my head was the tipping point.
Mr. department store salesman: we were looking for some cologne for DH. Would suggest next time you not say “this one is nasty: smell it!” It was nasty. And it only cost $495. We chose something else.
a dog is like man’s best friend,
try finding your new friend at humane society
:(|)
Ah yes, 30 minutes past the agreed upon time and we are waiting on a Sunday night
for you. This is why I never invite you when others are coming. Then everyone sits and waits.
Wonder what lame excuse you will have this time.
Dear mother-in-law: When asked where you want to be taken for your birthday dinner, you might consider having some idea of the price, rather than just naming a restaurant you’ve “heard is nice” that has prices at least double anything we’ve taken you to before. (And has essentially no options for our vegetarian kid.)
It’s beginning to look a lot like Purim…
It’s a terrible thing to admit but I’m sick of you. This latest plan of yours is everything that makes me crazy about you wrapped up in a nice little package. The worst part is that you sat on the couch all afternoon “researching” it while I was running around doing things. Sadly, we’ve been married long enough that I know your response to any of my objections will some how make it seem like you are so superior and I for some reason am lazy or don’t care about the kids. It’s amazing that you can spin things that way to suit yourself when necessary.
I came to work early just to find the lock is broken and now I have to wait for someone to fix it. Well, so much for getting an early start today.
Update on the nordstroms cologne: the big container of the nasty smelling stuff was $595. Not $495. My bad. The smaller size was “only” $305. Mr salesman- dont think we weren’t very aware that you took us away from the more reasonably (by comparison) priced wall of colognes ( “only” $85-$115) to drag us over to that nasty smelling ridiculously overpriced stuff that was in with the ladies fragrances. I am glad I am assertive, and politely redirected us back to the wall of fragrances we were originally at, across the store. What a marketing sham. Pull your customers to the absolutely most expensive stuff way away from the other choices. Didn’t work on us. The only reason we were shopping in your store is that I have 2 years worth of birthday gift cards to use. Obviously I dont spend much time in your store (the reason is now even more painfully clear). If we decide we like this cologne (we were very clear that we wanted 2 sizes- one for DHs gym bag and one to keep at home, but you pulled us way from those) we will replace it by shopping on line for it at a more reasonable price.
It is absolutely frustrating when you call someone once in each hour interval in a same day and don’t pick up a single time.
Is it positive that you don’t realize this is your first wedding anniversary since your partner of more than 60 years passed away or is it negative that you don’t (as far as we can tell) know?
Maybe you think I am selfish, but I don’t want anyone else to use the mini fridge in my office. I don’t want to clean up the stuff they “forget” to get rid of; I don’t want people to be traipsing in and out of my office all day to get their stuff; and I want to make sure there is room in the fridge for MY lunch, drinks, etc. Of course, you know all this, because I told you when you walked in my office and put your lunch in there. (I don’t know how you know about my fridge in the first place, but that’s a different issue.) You explained that the office fridge was on the fritz, so I let you keep your lunch in there in exchange for your promise to remove it by the end of the day and not to tell anyone else that I have a mini fridge in my office. So I get in this morning and see you left yesterday’s lunch in there. And I have had two other people come ask to put their lunch in my fridge this morning. Thanks for that. No good deed goes unpunished, I guess. But I have learned my lesson. No more favors for you.
No matter which direction you approach from, or how hard you glare, if the road that your GPS says should be there is not there, then it is not there. Go around.
Never in a million years did I ever think I would spend nearly 2 weeks staring at a giraffe’s bum. 
I’m about over adulting for the week, and yes, I know it’s only Tuesday.
I will need to think about what was said today. Seriously disturbing.
Half of my co-workers are idiots. They, unfortunately, are causing the intelligent co-workers to leave in droves. I’m just trying to hold on a year to retire or I would be right with them! How do people get professional jobs with no sense in their heads?!
We used to talk about all sorts of fun things, several times a week. Now every conversation is about something you read or something someone said. Stop the news. I want to chat the way we used to.
Dear old people everywhere: please stop showing up an hour (or more) early for everything. Fine if you want to sit there and read a magazine. Not fine if you want to crab about how nothing’s ready yet. Yup, it isn’t. Because you’re a freaking hour early.
And it is so not helpful to say “can I help you?” if that means I have to coach you through it or find some unnecessary thing for you to do to make you feel useful, while pretending it doesn’t bother me to have my day completely derailed. This happens constantly and I am just so tired of pasting a smile on my face about it and putting in time after hours to get back on track.