<p>mythmom - Inasmuch as I’d like to believe I had “inner strength” avoiding CC for a couple of days, I was actually not home most of Saturday and busily hosted Easter today. Well, at least it’s a healthy addiction.</p>
<p>zfam - I am so glad I am never the first one to get home; I’ll probably break a body part racing to the mailbox!</p>
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<p>jjcddg, now I want you to take this as if it were coming from your very best friend…you have to stop this right now. Yes, if it comes, there will be a letdown. There may even be grieving. But your job is to get your kid through this. Be sympathetic to your child and supportive of him. But also work on being matter of fact about the choices (or lack of choices). By 3-4 days after the final decision is made, you need to be helping your child start to get excited about his school.</p>
<p>Spend time on the school’s website. Find out about student organizations he might like and share those with him. Buy him a school t-shirt. Order tickets for a football game. There are things a state u can offer that more elite schools often can’t. Figure out what those are.</p>
<p>I had dreams for 4 years of S1 going to the Air Force Academy but he ended up at a state u. He is happy, fulfilled and is so glad he ended up there instead of the Academy. It’s 2 hours from our home, so we get to see more of him and have the peace of mind that we can just jump in the car and drive up there if he needs us to.</p>
<p>There are people who can’t send their kid to the state u because they can’t afford it. Their kid will stay home and go to community college. Your kid gets to go to the state u!</p>
<p>And…you have to remember…you don’t have all the results yet!</p>
<p>I went to state u and was admitted into an Ivy grad school. And I had amazing teachers.</p>
<p>One of the most important things that we can teach our kids is how to fail with grace - how to accept that life doesn’t always give you everything you want - and how to make the best of what you have been given. A state school is nothing to sneer at. OSU in Ohio is not an easy school to get into any more. Many many local kids are turned down. Same with Miami University. I am sure many other state schools are the same. Our kids need to be proud of their accomplishments. Some WILL get into the dream schools - and get the funding to go there. Others will get the shaft. Life can be unfair. When God closes a door, He opens a window. I firmly believe that. </p>
<p>We are waiting to hear from 3 schools at this point - and financial aid on two others. These are the ones he is MORE interested in. Plus he is following up with two coaches to see if he can walk on their teams (ie does not want any athletic money). Its like interviewing for a job - he hates it.</p>
<p>I so vividly remember going through this last year. It felt like I was holding my breath for a month–and my son had gotten an early write from a great school in late Feb. I thought that would calm me down and it did–for a few days. Then I was right back to the love-hate relationship with our mailbox. I used to even walk up and down our street–good exercise btw–waiting for the mail to come. I think the first of the late responders came on March 25 and after that they came pouring in.</p>
<p>I second the positives of state U. I attended mine for several months to get pre-reqs for nursing school. Even the huge classes were good, but I had some smaller ones too and they even let me take some graduate level courses in the summer that were excellent. Confine your venting and mourning (if you must mourn) to CC. It could turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to your kid.</p>
<p>I keep saying this to myself: this process is hard. Our daughter has gotten into her 2nd choice school, and for that I have very grateful. I feel confident that she will be/would be happy there. What I am dreading now is possible rejections from other schools. I like your advice, Timely. Important thoughts. My daughter is the kind of kid who internalizes disappointments. She might be upset, but won’t allow herself to be comforted by anyone initially. If/when the time comes, I will suggest a trip to visit the school she has been accepted by. Thanks.</p>
<p>“I went to state u and was admitted into an Ivy grad school. And I had amazing teachers.”…me too and I might add that some of the most naturally intelligent people I have met in my entire life were my classmates at that state U…</p>
<p>bethie: Those walks would do me very well right now, but NE/Mid-Atlantic weather is not cooperating; still a little chilly, but I’m starting to get so antsy, I may bundle up…</p>
<p>wedgedrive: We are definitely in your exact position; admitted to 2nd on her list…so happy, but we need to get through the next phase; our d also internalizes disappointments…we have already planned a trip to her 2nd choice school…</p>
<p>S got two more big envelopes this morning. (A very nice trip to the post office, and I was able to skip the Ben & Jerry’s, which is a good thing because a new and larger-waisted wardrobe is definitely not in the cards! 
) </p>
<p>I am mightily relieved, although he still has 9 schools to hear from and the FA will be absolutely crucial–and we haven’t gotten the FA amounts from 2 of the 3 yet. But now he has some great choices, whatever happens with the rest of the list.</p>
<p>Ditto to everyone here. My son is cool but I am not.</p>
<p>I’m glad to see I’m not alone.</p>
<p>I CAN’T STAND IT!!! I’m seeing accepts and waitlists from some of d’s schools, and I’m at work and can’t check the mail! I’m losing my mind… my coworkers tease me that I’ve got ‘admissions ADD’.</p>
<p>I am right there with you all. First child going away. He does have a couple of acceptances which is a blessing. He will be happy if he doesn’t get another acceptance, but I am waiting impatiently to know what his options really are. I just want to put all the puzzle pieces together and see the picture before him. I also want to book airfare if he needs to visit etc before the time gets too short for low priced fares. </p>
<p>I remember before early admit several of us were have tooth pain because we were grinding our teeth from stress. Now I think I am stress eating. I need this to end soon. Too much good comfort food (fried, gravy, grits, etc) where I live. Salad is just not a comfort.</p>
<p>deepsouthmom, that really hit home… I’ve been having aching in my teeth too, and I realized it’s from clenching my jaw so tight it makes my teeth throb. I’m trying really hard to NOT do it, but it’s hard because I’m not aware of it until it’s too late.</p>
<p>:: sets a plate of brownies on the table in the Vigil Lounge ::</p>
<p>:: puts out clean bowls and spoons ::</p>
<p>Ice cream’s in the freezer, folks. Good luck to all!</p>
<p>just read thru all of your posts–and needed to join in–what a relief to see I am not the only addicted to CC–or the only one whose kids mock how often we are on here. (I knew I was an addict when I started to explain to my s why I needed to be on CC so often–because my d is only one year behind as a junior so I have sooo much to read…</p>
<p>I realized the other day that though this waiting period is stressful once all the acceptances are in we’ll be really having to deal with them leaving. (stating the obvious I know) but it kind of makes me want to hold onto this moment in time when we are actually still so connected to our child, rooting for them, talking etc. reminds me of waking up to feed my crying newborn ann wishing they would sleep thru the night–then realizing that those quiet 2 a.m. feedings, rocking my baby were golden moments not to be wished away but relished–even though exhausted. thanks for all of your humanness in these posts.</p>
<p>uh, thanks, i finished the brownies, did anyone else get one?</p>
<p>not ready for ice cream, mail’s not for 3 hours…anyone got cookies?</p>
<p>will chewy chocolate chip do? definitely a time we crave comfort food–</p>
<p>lindz, I think that’s what makes this SOoooooo anxiety-producing… that it is so bittersweet. I’ve so enjoyed being a mom, and I know that’s not going to end, but it IS going to be redefined. And as much as sometimes they drive me to distraction, my kids also ground me. It’s going to redefine ME as much as my D and our relationship. </p>
<p>I just want her to go out and be happy and successful (however she decides to define that), and this waiting to see what the next phase will be is just hard. Honestly, I don’t care which college she chooses, it’s just the idea of her having to make such a huge decision… </p>
<p>So now I’m going to cry…</p>
<p>Regarding state schools, after 4 years in a boarding school where I felt like a fish out of water with my middle class sensibilities, I felt like I had found my natural environment in a state flagship which I chose only after my parents wouldn’t hear of me attending my private dream school in another geographic region. Flash forward, and S is at his dream school, a top 20 private in another geographic region, after a public education in a midwestern college town and has fish out of water feelings that remind me of my high school days. Now D will be choosing between 1 (maybe 2) privates in other geographic regions that seem to fit her interests closely and 3 state flagships (2 of which are in other geographic regions and so would still fit her out of the midwest urges). I’m wondering if a state school might be a better fit for her and wondering even more if I should try to talk to her about it. (She and her brother are very different personalities, so I’m not sure it’s the same for her.) I guess I’ll have a lot of second-guessing until she’s happily at whatever her final choice is.</p>
<p>“Honestly, I don’t care which college she chooses, it’s just the idea of her having to make such a huge decision…”</p>
<p>Yups, that is why I have a stash of Hershey’s Dark chocolate kisses on hand…(“though I’ve heard that dark chocolate is actually an antioxidant”, she rationalizes after eating a handful…)</p>
<p>re #95: Cookies, schmookies…Denise, I hate to tell you this, but I have a small business making truffles and chocolates and other confections.</p>
<p>Anyone want to come over? :)</p>