<p>Our son has a very high IQ, but doesn’t use it to his best advantage. Starting in elementary school, he refused to enter the recommended honors program because he didn’t want to leave his friends for separate classes; this finally relucantly changed starting in middle school. </p>
<p>Throughout high school (and entire school career), he has never received a grade lower than a B, and two years received straight As on the semester system at his high school. He’s always been on the principal’s honor roll and sometimes district-wide honor roll for straight As. He’s been in National Honor Society two years, but has only been involved in a couple ECs outside of that. He has always said he studies better “at the last minute,” and for high school this method has apparently worked well enough, as his memory is very good. (For college, that approach will not work well). He only very rarely does any homework besides what is absolutely required, although he is never one to skip or miss assignments. With honors and AP classes he studies on average 30 minutes to 1-1/2 hours a night, with 45 minutes being more of an average. He rarely reads the text and instead uses provided study sheets, notes, and sometimes only his memory when studying for tests. He uses the texts only to answer questions. In other words, he only does what he HAS to do. </p>
<p>I know this may not be uncommon, but it’s frustrating because he definitely has the intelligence to have gotten into Ivy League schools if he had studied more and become more involved in ECs. </p>
<p>Good GPA at 3.8 unweighted, 4.2 weighted. He took the SAT twice, but refused to study for either test, only looking at the “study tips” for about an hour, and we couldn’t afford an SAT class or tutor. SAT scores for CR and Math were 1200 combined. National Honor Society. Straight As sophomore and junior year and upward trend in terms of grades and challenge all four years. He has not taken advantage of as many AP classes as his friends (often taking the easier route by selecting Honors instead) and will only have 3 APs by time of graduation, although the majority of the time took Honors. He did exceed the requirement on our state testing required for graduation, which insures him free tuition at any of our state universities. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining about his grades (!), but yes, I am frustrated he hasn’t been more inspired and always sought the easy route in terms of homework, etc. I was more book smart (had to study hard) and he’s more inherently smart, so it’s difficult for me to see him not use all his talents. </p>
<p>Following the same theme, he’s said until recently he only wanted to go to an in-state school (our best in-state school is ranked in the 90’s in U.S. News & World Report and all our state schools as known to be heavy on partying.) Just a few days ago he indicated he wants to apply to more selective schools and go out of state, but I’m concerned whether he has what he takes, given his relaxed attitude and scores. I do think he’ll be in for a shock if he doesn’t change his study techniques when going off to college. </p>
<p>One more thing – when selecting schools for consideration, he seems quite fickle. Examples: Doesn’t want to go to school in a neighboring state because he doesn’t like the people there, doesn’t like this or that city (and has never been there), NYC is “dirty” so won’t go there (has never been there), talks about heading to a particular school only once a friend mentions their interest in it, etc. </p>
<p>We love him dearly, but he’s hard to read at times! Should we be counseling him more on college selection (we’ve been helpful all along) or just stay out of things? He’s a great kid, never partied, every parent’s dream, but just hasn’t applied all his talents and we want to make sure he’s properly placed in college. Thanks for reading this long note!</p>