<p>I posted this thread on the forum but only got one response. So… I’m posting it here :D</p>
<p>I was driving back from the california democratic convention(yes, democrats ARE socially liberal) and decided to go to a party. I called up a friend and was told that there was a huge party going on. So, I decide to go there. Immediately when I pull up to the house( a 10 million dollar mansion in San Marino no less) I see the lookouts pulling out their phone and start telling their friends that the cops have arrived.I drive an undercover cop car But, when I get out of the car everyone else gets much more relaxed. I go into the party and see the things I was expecting. The party was held in the backyard. I see kegs of beer, cans of beer, some other hard liquor. There were a few people smoking (cigarettes, not pot by the smell of it) and the place generally had lots of trash around it.</p>
<p>I recognized about 20-30 people from what I estimate were 75 people at the party. Everyone there was like “Whoa ____ I never expected to see you here, let me introduce you to some people?”. I think this point bears some explaining. For the past 4 years I have been really concentrated on stuff which was pertinent( Academics, Student Government, etc etc). Don’t get me wrong. I am not a hermit who sits alone and just reads ap chem to myself. But, I like to go to the movies or a play or comedy acts or other such things, heck I LOVE the Youth and Government and hs dances. I had never been to party of this caliber.</p>
<p>My question is, should I continue going?</p>
<p>Driving back from the party(where I was the designated driver, driving my drunk friend home) I realized that I was probably the only person at that social function who looked at all the activities and the theming of it(Sue me or Screw Me) from a Sociological/Anthropological standpoint and immediately thought that I could write a graduate thesis on this. Does this make me a total nerd? I was also probably the only one who knew the reaction involved in a breathalyzer test and knew how to reverse the reaction. If I remember correctly, it includes putting an aldehyde like cinnamon gummi bears and copper(like a penny) together to reverse the reaction and show a false negative. This was related to me by my Organic Chemistry prof even though I would never be stupid enough to drink and drive. This could also be studied within a controlled setting ( ie, a lab) although lots of people might get upset at me.</p>
<p>Seeing as it is my senior year, I want to explore some of the activities which I havent explored in the past. I posted on this board because I would like the wise and wizened(apologize in advance, couldnt help myself) guidance of some of the parents on cc.</p>
<p>Different people find different situations to be fun and/or relaxing. I say continue to go so long as you can amuse yourself and can do so without infringing on the good moods of others, aka live and let live. People watching is not a crime. Steer clear of imparting info about beating breathalyzer tests. There are worse things than getting a dui, like killing oneself or someone else. I’d be wary of providing information that might be construed as helping a person to do that.</p>
<p>So let me get this straight. You stopped in on a party where there was trash creation and underage drinking, with (if your title is any indication) a hint of possible pot smoking and hooking up in the house, with “lookouts” posted out front to warn everyone if they were in imminent danger of getting busted. You enjoyed being there and are asking us to endorse your regular attendance at such parties. Is that right?</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>Most of us may have been teenagers in the '60s and '70s, but I don’t think we’re going to go there.</p>
<p>(PS: mcdeb is right, people watching isn’t a crime. But there may be other things going on at these parties which <em>are</em> crimes, so if you decide to go, be aware.)</p>
<p>the title was meant to draw attention to the thread, not necessarily an accurate description of what was going on there</p>
<p>in fact, there was no music playing and people were just standing around chit-chatting. Things werent even hot and heavy, at least in public. I think I might have seen one couple go inside</p>
<p>thats why I left about 30 minutes after arriving</p>
<p>I made an entrance, mingled, then thought that this party would shortly be broken up by the police. That’s when I decided to grab my friend and go. Incidentally, driving back to the freeway we saw some cops heading in the direction of the house</p>
<p>If you don’t mind the opinion of an in-between yuppie who’s neither student nor parent – hell yes, you should keep going to that kind of party if you enjoyed yourself! You’re not doing anything wrong if you aren’t doing anything wrong, if you know what I mean. Think ahead and make responsible decisions so you don’t get hurt or contribute to other people getting hurt. Then have a good time.</p>
<p>Edited to add: I’ve never even been drunk, but I’ve been to my share of parties that were broken up by the cops. If attending said parties impeded a student’s future success, the professional population of this country would consist of three Promise Keepers and an eighty-six-year-old nun. It’s normal, and it’s really OK.</p>
<p>Is it illegal for you to be at a party where there is underage drinking if you are not drinking yourself? I would have assumed the answer is no, however it’s not something you want to guess about. If there isn’t a statute or town ordinance stating that it is illegal to be at a party where underage drinking is occurring, you might get hassled or tested but if you have no alcohol in your system, I don’t know what they would charge you with. </p>
<p>When you are at college, you will be at parties where alcohol is available to those 21 and over. Could you get arrested if someone else under 21 had a drink? What would the charge be? How would you know they were underage? Clubs give out wristbands to kids between the ages of 18 and 21 to show who is old enough to drink. Could you get arrested if one of the other underage partyers had a drink? </p>
<p>If you’re under 18, maybe they could get you with a juvenile deliquency charge.</p>
<p>Interesting article about ordinances prohibiting mere presence at parties where underage drinking is occurring, not a very widespread phenomena according to this article.</p>
<p>Things change in college - overnight - it will make your head spin. You will undoubtedly face at least a few internal struggles about behavior and choices, in the light of whoever you have become to date and what your currrent views are about various social and moral issues. The more self-reflective you happen to be, the more potential for inner conflict (and conversely, more opportunities to achieve flexibility and growth). </p>
<p>Example: S visited a college overnight in junior year. In the men’s bathroom, there was a box of condoms taped to the wall, with the following sign: “Help yourself! However, if you are a real warrior between the sheets, please get your own supply.” Whereas many HS and family environments strongly discourage hooking up, here was written evidence of a new community culture, a non-judgmental, practical approach. Attitudes towards drinking are similar - ‘knock yourself out, just don’t puke on the communal bathroom floor.’</p>
<p>It’s all up to you, who you are, who you are becoming, and who you wish to be. No judgement (or very little) and no parental controls, except those you may have internalized (e.g., “If you get a girl pregnant outside of marriage, you are damned.”). </p>
<p>As the immortal Kurt Vonnegut stated, “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.” (Mother Night)</p>