<p>FS - nice place :)</p>
<p>Free State Project! ! =D</p>
<p>Please forgive me for bring this thread back, but I just read the RS article. DU is one of the schools my 11th grade D is considering and my BIL sent H the article. In fact D and I were planning a trip to DU next weekend.</p>
<p>Most of my concerns about what has been labeled the Duke Culture have been stated in many of the posts in this thread. I hope those of you who have posted that this extreme behavior is primarily limited to 4 or 5 sororities and fraternities are correct. I applaud the Duke administration for studying the problem and spending $$$ to change the present situation. What saddens me is the head in sand attitude of the parents of students in these sororities and fraternities - especially the parents who have daughters in those sororities.</p>
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<p>Reading the RS article made me cry, these young women are asking for help.
Well, now the moms and dads do know, but what are they doing?</p>
<p>I’ve asked repeatedly on the Duke rape thread for someone to explain the “Duke Culture”–which I thought might explain why the lacrosse boys made themselves so vulnerable to being accused of rape by virtue of their previous unchecked behavior. </p>
<p>I agree, the quotes are truly dismaying. It’s like these girls have no souls.</p>
<p>When I visited S graduation 2006 at CMU, he left me with a lot of time to myself. I have wandering feet. I also visited a lot of the restrooms to verify taxdad’s analysis.</p>
<p>Across the street from his dorm is CMU’s Greek quad. Although the school was closed and open only for grad ceremonies, the patio and each frat dining room were littered with alcoholic containers. </p>
<p>His roommate stayed one summer at CMU for internship at one of the frats. His mother visited him and cried upon leaving because the living conditions resembled a slum. For the money that we and they were spending-the kids should be more tidy.</p>
<p>“Well, now the moms and dads do know, but what are they doing?”</p>
<p>Helping their kids apply to Duke, of course. ;)</p>
<p>At the school I went to (an academic, liberal public) sorority women were sometimes referred to as ‘rape fodder.’ And that was a long time ago. In other words, the history of exploitative behavior on frat row goes a ways back. Which is why it amazes me that sorority and fraternieties even exist anymore. When D was in high school I was frank with her about what goes on, and made sure her eyes were wide open to the entire Greek system. As result one of her ‘musts’ for a school was a low-key Greek scene at most. I think, if more mothers were more honest with their Ds, a lot of this outrageous behavior would cease, as would sororities.</p>
<p>I am one of the most conservative parents I know, especially with respect to hooking-up, one-night stands, casual physical relationships, committed premarital relationships,etc. That being said, I hardly think the hooking-up culture is limited to only schools that have a Greek Life. </p>
<p>Georgetown is a Jesuit school with no recognized fraternities or sororities.</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.thehoya.com/viewpoint/092104/view7.cfm[/url]”>http://www.thehoya.com/viewpoint/092104/view7.cfm</a></p>
<p>The article is a bit old but according to the kids we know there, it is still very accurate.</p>
<p>I have read the complaints by CCers regarding the prevalence of alcohol at Williams and Amherst, neither of which have recognized Greek organizations for at least a decade.</p>
<p>To me, it’s more of a drinking atmosphere in general at most colleges and a lack of morality taught at home. The combination of the 2 make a dangerous combination.</p>
<p>I don’t think this type of sexual environment is at all limited to the frat/sorority scene. There is plenty of casual “hooking up” among the kids at S’s school. I really worry about disease and the lack of any attempt at real intimacy. If you want to experience true disgust, check out w w w.tuckermax.com- this is the idol of many college kids, including my son.</p>
<p>And the hook-up/drinking ‘culture’ starts waaaaaay before kids leave for college 
- so this is not a new culture at all.</p>
<p>I agree the behavior/culture identified in the RS article occurs in many schools, and most parents are unaware that their child is an active participant. But if your child is a current Duke student and in one of the half dozen sororities or fraternities mentioned in the article it becomes more likely or even probable that your child is involved. I am just surprised 
the parents of these students have not expressed their outrage. :eek:</p>
<p>And if the parents express their outrage??? This behavior will change? These are young adults. They have, for the most part, been making their own choices for a number of years. There is nothing a parent or an administration can do about sexual behavior at this point. Perhaps it goes more underground and the parents can sleep better?</p>
<p>Don’t forget that a lot of parents of current students may have been quite “active” in college themselves a couple of decades ago.</p>
<p>“Do as I say, not as I do (did).”</p>
<p>Perhaps parents just trust their children’s judgement, and ability to make appropriate decisions for themselves.</p>
<p>Maybe this is a little off-topic as about drinking instead of sex, but–</p>
<p>I think that parents bear some small responsibility for, and some influence toward, their child’s behavior. It’s called money. I have always wondered how the Duke team, for example, could get away with paying fine after fine without their parents noticing. I think the parents did notice and <em>wink wink.</em> That’s from my experience: when our son was in h.s., he got a speeding ticket. It took nearly all of his month’s allowance! Wow! He learned a hard lesson, and has not been in trouble since. But if parents are shelling out huge amounts of spending money, then mischief doesn’t matter. </p>
<p>Perhaps the very wealthy don’t worry because of connections, but here’s a very sobering story for the rest of us that my son told me just last night: someone in his house in the class of '07 was recently offered a plum job with a very well-known financial institution in New York. Wow! He was happy! A day after the phone call the offer was rescinded. Why? Because the boy just this last summer was involved in a drinking altercation in the house. Even scarier, the charges were dropped, but somehow the financial institution got wind of it. Our kids need to know this!</p>
<p>faraway–you hit the nail on the head.</p>
<p>None of my money would go toward financing such a lifestyle. The girls who plunk down plastic and run a tab everywhere they go? $10 martinis every day? No way.</p>
<p>These girls don’t realize it, but what they are is high-class call girls. No different from girls in other parts of town who sleep with HS dropouts & druggies, instead of holding out for someone who will meet THEIR standards. Females really do have sexual power over men, if they would only exercise it.</p>
<p>Sorry if that’s harsh. It’s just sad to see people in exclusively sexual relationships when they should be learning about themselves and each other as potential life partners.</p>
<p>farawayplaces, the point you made is the one my H keeps telling D. In this age of micro-mimi cameras and cell phones that take movies - there will definitely be a photo or movie of sorority girl (w/ exposed chest covered in whipped cream and chocolate) sitting on the lap of some frat boy. Very few employers are going to be pleased to learn one of their employees is the movie’s star. And forget about running for a political office. Maybe when these students parents where in college their parents money could cover-up this type of behavior but today, IMO, technology trumps money.</p>
<p>If we can now forgive pot and coke use back in the day, doing some naughty photos will not be that big a deal 20 years from now.<br>
I wish I had photos of some of our office parties back in the 70’s and 80’s.</p>
<p>barrons–they might not be a big deal 20 years from now, but they are a big deal now and 10 years from now. </p>
<p>Same way “I tried it but didn’t inhale” gave way to “Sure I tried it, didn’t everyone?” But it took awhile.</p>
<p>I think it is easier to forget/forgive something you hear about than something you can actually see. A picture has a much more powerful impact on the psyche.</p>