Should I drop out?

Paying for College
1

<p>I’m sorry if this is long, but I’ve been thinking about this for a long time and I was wondering if anybody could give me some input.</p>

<p>So. I’ll start with stats.
Rising sophomore
Top 15 LAC
International (Europe) on FA
3.6 ish GPA for first semester
Humanities major</p>

<p>I understand I’m not in a horrible situation, and if I existed in a vacuum, I would be rather relaxed, in fact, but I just feel really guilty towards my parents. I don’t know how common or big FA is for internationals, but I’m getting about 2/3 total cost paid by my college, which still leaves my mom with about 15k a year to pay out of pocket. She’s got a good job atm and says she can afford it, but she’s raised me alone all my life, and because of family illness/occasional job issues/some other unpleasant stuff, I think she’s only got about 50k in savings. My grandma recently died, and left us her apartment as well as the apartment we currently live in, but they’re not like deluxe 2kmsq things in historical buildings, and we still have to live somewhere too. She says she can afford it, but idk she’s not that excited about it.</p>

<p>The reason I feel guilty is because, since I’m not only not interested, but also not good at engineering and science and things, I feel like I’m wasting time and money pursuing a useless education. I love my literature major, and I think it’s important, and I think it’s really useful for me personally in some capacity that I can’t quite describe, but I also feel like, as an international on FA, majoring in literature is a bit gluttonous of me. My crappy GPA isn’t so much due to taking hard quant classes that I couldn’t succeed at (though I did drop out of linear algebra cos it was clear I would have to work really hard to get a B) as it is to spreading myself thin and worrying a lot, all the time, about whether I’m doing the right thing. I got one B first semester for drawing, so at least I’m not going down the fine arts path, but the humanities path isn’t something I wanted for myself either. I’ve thought of doing Econ or something social-science (I genuinely have interests in Econ that span beyond getting an IB job, but I hate the fieldwork and I can’t do the math), but now that I’ve declared my major, I’ve realized that I love it and can’t possibly go back. I had a bit of a rough time settling in, especially since my current school isn’t as prestigious as I was hoping for (don’t hate - prestige is the bulk of the net worth of the degree when you’re an international), but now I found friends and a couple of new activities that I really enjoy, and I love my school. I have some experience washing dishes, and also some accounting experience since this summer (and possibly an internship with one of the Big 4). I’m not sure, however, how well I can sell my degree back home, and don’t people look at humanities majors as slackers, anyway?</p>

<p>I don’t want to be a slacker.</p>

<p>So, basically, I was wondering if you guys think I should tough out a STEM major (I’m not too keen on Econ now, since, as a budding Economist, it seems counterintuitive to me to major in Econ and expect the degree to pay off when there’s such an obvious glut of Econ BAs on the market), or stick with my passion? Should I transfer up (haven’t seen 2nd semester grades, but fingers crossed)? Should I drop out?</p>

<p>My mom has a PhD in economics, so obviously she thinks education is really important, but I think that may by truer for the world she inhabits than the one I do. I’ve obviously looked into literature grad school, but it seems like a bunch of hot air and I frankly quite like living outside of the gulag of academia. I thought I should just quit like Steve Jobs, but I’m scared that it’s not the right decision.</p>

2

<p>Hang in there; forget the idea of dropping out. Have an open conversation with your mom if possible.</p>

3

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<p>Financial aid for internationals is about as rare as hen’s teeth - so consider yourself blessed to have been offered the FA that you have! You won’t find it anywhere else . . . and financial aid packages for transfer students are notoriously bad, even for domestic applicants. So transferring is probably out of the question.</p>

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<p>You’re not Steve Jobs. There are very few people who are . . . and those few know exactly what they want to do with their lives. You have no clue.</p>

<p>You said you have some experience washing dishes, so that’s certainly an option for you. You could drop out and become a dishwasher. Not in the U.S., of course, but back home. It’s up to you to figure out if it will pay well enough for you to live on.</p>

<p>Otherwise, the best thing for you to do is stay in school and pursue a major that you LOVE . . . and that you can perform well in. It’s not essential right now that you know where it will lead, but it is important that you keep your grades up. That way, when you figure out what you want to do, you’ll at least have a decent looking CV.</p>

<p>Meanwhile, pursue any internship you can . . . it may not be a job you love, but the experience may help you to figure out what it is that you do want to do.</p>

4

<p>Transfer up?</p>

<p>I doubt you’d get accepted or better aid as a transfer. Stay put and do your best.</p>

5

<p>Stay where you are…get your degree, and go from there.</p>

6

<p>3.6 is not a crappy GPA by any means, and nothing wrong with a major in the humanities. What would you be studying if you were in your home country? </p>

<p>My suggestion would be that you do some reading on culture shock and cultural adaptation. Some of your emotions may be colored by the stress of adjusting to life in a new and different country, far from your usual network of family and friends. If you’ve been in the US for about 9 months, you are right at the time point where all of the adjustment stress often comes to a head, and people start thinking seriously about bailing out of the “new” situation. Toughing things through past the 12 month mark usually results in people feeling happier with their situation.</p>

<p>If you really are feeling lost about your life/career/everything, take some time this summer to consider a leave of absence. A semester off from school while you work/volunteer/think about life may be just what you really need.</p>

<p>Wishing you all the best.</p>

7

<p>Ditto everything happymomof1 wrote. Sorry to tell you this, but every field has its snobs. Say you transfer to engineering and work like a madwoman to be barely functional. You would have, for sure, someone who says “civil engineering? What a droll, slacker option for you. Bioengineering with an M.D. is where the REAL workers go.”</p>

<p>I kid you not. I think you ought to be on your knees giving thanks that you have a) a parent who values education; b) a few friends you treasure; c) some courses you like immensely; d) some real financial aid; e) a roof over your family’s head; f) a great GPA (you’re something of a spoiled snot, dearie, for thinking a college GPA of 3.6 is an embarrassment. Try a 1.6 – then you could whine some). </p>

<p>There’s a scripture that goes "I cried because I had no shoes until I saw a man who had no feet. " </p>

<p>So try having a profound “Attitude of gratitude” for a few weeks. Take time to communicate to mom, friends and great professors how glad you are that they have been in your life. I hope you’ll watch the sobering but delightful “Last Lecture” by Randy Pausch. </p>

<p>If you look into the life of Steve Jobs, you’ll find that there were times when he was a tremendous jerk. Although he was innovative, he could be unkind. Is that who you are? Or are you someone different? I suspect you are you. </p>

<p>People who are abundantly blessed often obsess with obtaining perfection. Perfection is not an option for most of us (I’m a paraplegic and I can’t begin to tell you how badly I would like to walk on a beach and wiggle my toes in the sand – and that’s a blessing you are likely to have as an option and have you even considered that blessing in the last year?). </p>

<p>Please. More gratitude. Less comparing oneself to anyone else. If you are disgruntled, explore the specifics. Are you terrified that you won’t make enough $$ to satisfy your champagne tastes? J. K. Rowlings seems to have done well in literature (although her net worth has dropped lately as she has given much away). </p>

<p>That’s my 2cents worth. I hope you’ll talk to your friends and mom before tossing away your current path. Good luck.</p>