<p>I’ve seen elderly in our area get cleaned out by neighbors who got into bank accounts, credit cards, even changing wills. The oldster’s relatives went to cops and state and they said there was little they could do if semi-out-of-it old guy let neighbor buy cars, jewelry, etc. for herself with his dough. Sad.</p>
<p>Unless the victim cooperates with the police and insists that he was robbed, or he is so out of it that he can be declared incompetent and a guardian gets assigned, no, there often is nothing that can be done. If this is next of kin and that’s the way he lives, with lots of friends coming around and hanging about, there is no law broken. We are also making some presumptions that the OP’s neighbor is being scammed or taken advantage of. That may not be the case. This may truly be the only family member willing to help out and help may be needed. And that’s the way this person lives. (S)he’ll help, live in, take charge, but the friends and visits are part of the deal, take it or leave it, and your neighbor may have no choice. There is no evidence that drugs, theft is taking place. It’s just that things have changed from the way they were and there are strangers around the house now and no sign of the neighbors. So, yes, the police , the authorities should check this out. But this might just the way it works in this case.</p>
<p>There have been no cars stopping by this evening and tonight. It’s almost eerily quiet.</p>
<p>For the record, I do not sit and look out the window 24/7. It’s the kitchen window that overlooks the street, and I am in and out of the kitchen a lot. I would have never been looking out the window at 4 a.m. if my dog had not been barking at something. That scene is what really made me think this is something more serious than boys chasing a girl.</p>
<p>The granddaughter was 5 when we moved in, and is 28 now. My ex predicted she would be pregnant by the time she was 16. I think she was pregnant at 14 or 15. Her mom signed for her to marry the guy. She now has 4 kids and does not have custody of any of them. She is a beautiful girl, so I can see why the boys are attracted to her. But I haven’t seen the same car twice since I started keeping track a week ago, so it does not appear to be the same guy or two trying to “court” her.</p>
<p>The police customer did not come to the office today. Maybe tomorrow. </p>
<p>I am from NHV, CT and have seen drug trafficking…this smells of it…big time!!! You have a right to look out your window!! You pay taxes and that’s your right.you deserve a neighborhood free from miscreants and ne’er dowels… …so no need to explain. Mention it to your police friend and he will tell you how to proceed. Those FOUR babies were taken away for a good reason…I would bet my life that it’s due to drugs…</p>
<p>My bet is that your elderly neighbors have lost control of how things should be and the younger generation has taken over and the rules have changed. Maybe there are sales of contraband of any sorts happening, or this just might be the way she lives now that the controls are gone.</p>
<p>There may even be some elder neglect issues going on as well</p>
<p>And there may not be. However, someone with some authority should check things out. The police is the best first stop. Perhaps they will send a social worker from Adult Protective Services–another agency you can contact, again give the name of the medical services that you see going there. The right thing to do, when you see something unusual happening to your neighbors, is to report it to the authorities who can check things out. </p>
<p>A former neighbor was running drugs out of the home owned/occupied by his bedridden mother. We’d know when he was in jail because traffic would die down on the main road (the house was at the top of the cul-de-sac). There were fights, area break-ins, screaming matches.
The police were notified. It. Took 2 years of surveillance (some out of another neighbor’s home) and police visits before the guy was arrested and the bank foreclosed on the house. The mother was dead by then. When the new owner moved in, he was visited on a few occasions by former customers until word got out.
The police are paid to handle these things. We were told to not engage them in any way, to call if there were fights or traffic picked up.
Call adult protective services if you think there’s neglect and call the police about the other activity. Odds are high it’s not normal visiting going on. </p>
<p>I agree it sounds both fishy and dangerous. Don’t try speaking to the grandparents. If they had any power, this wouldn’t be happening. Please ask the police for advice. </p>
<p>I don’t think this is being a “snitch” either. It’s looking after ones neighbors and being alert for any possibilities that things are not going well. Frankly, I believe that there is a good chance that all is above board on the surface and the authorities are not going to be able to do anything if that is the case. There are certain definite lines that have to be crossed before any action can be taken. The situation might well be commensurate with the way the new head of the household lives. People do live that way, you know WIthout evidence of neglect of your elderly neighbors or that they are being held hostage against their will, or of illegal doings, not much to be done Unsavory lifestyles, visitors to the house, looking shady, are not crimes. </p>
<p>But if the police and Social services for the elderly do arrive on the scene, it does give the “caretaker” there warning that she is being watched, and she may watch her step a bit more instead getting emboldened that she has Carte Blanche to live as she pleases. </p>
<p>Here is information that might be helpful from the Administration on Aging of the Department of Health and Human Services:</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.aoa.gov/AoA_programs/Elder_Rights/EA_Prevention/WhatToDo.aspx”>http://www.aoa.gov/AoA_programs/Elder_Rights/EA_Prevention/WhatToDo.aspx</a></p>
<p>and some further information on elder abuse and neglect:</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.helpguide.org/mental/elder_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm”>http://www.helpguide.org/mental/elder_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm</a></p>
<p>It is almost impossible to do much when the elderly can’t care for themselves and the caretakers are not so good at the care. In this case, there may well be the required care. A medical van is showing up regularly. The caretake is not a “carpetbagger”. She’s lived with her grandparents since she was a child. It’s just not that she’s in charge, she able to live the way she wants to live, with a lot of guests at the house and of the type that the grandparents would not have permitted. That kind of thing isn’t going to get someone knocked out of elder care.</p>
<p>The thing of concern is that those neighbors may truly want the caretaker OUT and are not in shape to communicate this. Maybe some illegal things are happenings. But someone with the authority needs to get in there and talk to the folks. </p>
<p>From my experience, it takes a lot to have the state take over, when a relative, especially one who was living there all of those years, is handling the care, unless neglect, abuse, legal lines have been blatantly and clearly crossed. But just in case they are, someone needs to take a peek in there.</p>
<p>OP, if you don’t like the types visiting the house, you might want to beef up your own security measures.</p>
<p>I posted yesterday that there were no cars there yesterday evening. Then at about 10:45 p.m. I am sitting at my computer and I hear three weird beeps. Not a car horn, more like a whistle. I looked out the kitchen window and there was a car parked across the street at their gate. It is dark as the street light at the corner does not illuminate very far. I watched for a few minutes and nothing happened. I was about to leave the window when I saw someone moving from my left. There was another car parked at MY curb that I could not see. A person left that car and walked across the street and got in the first car. They both left. Scared me to death!!! I think maybe the “tones” I heard may have been from opening the car door. I did notice that, when the person got in the car across the street, the interior lights did not come on when he/she opened the door. There has been no activity today, but it has been raining all day. Or maybe the grandparents kicked the Gdtr out. I don’t know. The Gdtr’s mother (owners’ daughter) also lives there and probably does much of the caregiving. Their son is there a few days a week also. </p>
<p>The police detective still has not come in to my office, but a friend of mine knows the director of the drug task force and is going to call him to inquire if they are aware of anything going on there. This is a little too much drama for me. I live a very simple, boring life…usually. </p>
<p>I have no outside light on that side of my house. I am thinking of installing one. That would really put a damper on their activity. Or it might make them mad.</p>
<p>An outside light is an excellent idea - for many reasons. Do it!</p>
<p>When you were standing at your kitchen window watching was your kitchen light on? In other words if you can see them then is it possible they can see you?</p>
<p>And there could be nothing going on. I agree with the others that it might be a good idea to check on the elderly. Clearly you are afraid but I would try not to think yourself into more fear. Younger people come and go at all hours and just as it’s possible something untoward is occurring there is just as much chance nothing is going on. It is a a good sign that home health care people are stopping as they also are required to “report” if they suspect any abuse occuring. </p>
<p>Nothing last night and nothing today so far. I don’t know if the Gdtr is gone (moved out, kicked out, away for a few days, in jail, or what) but suddenly there are no cars at all. I feel so relieved when I don’t see cars over there all the time now that I’ve figured out something was not right. I know kids come and go at odd hours, but there was never the same car twice in the week that I was writing them down.</p>
<p>When I look out the window at night, my light is not on. I don’t even crack the blinds any more. Because of the way the blinds fit, there is about a 1/2-inch crack at the very bottom. I crawl to the window and sit on the floor to peer through that crack. In the dark. Must look pretty comical to the fly on the wall. LOL</p>
<p>Maybe go install a light today - that way it won’t be quite as obvious if they come back and it’s there!</p>
<p>Install a light and, for goodness sakes, report this to the police so that someone can check on the elderly couple there. </p>
<p>I really think it’s a matter of the homeowners losing the upper hand of control in the home. Yes, some people have a lot of company. Their friends are always around. We had to give our older sons some guidelines and rules after they were well into adulthood about who to bring over to our home. When they were in school, it was open house, but things change. From what you have said about the young woman there, her choices in life were not so wise anyways. </p>
<p>That all of this is happening, even if no sign of illegal activities are there, if a lot of strangers of the sort you feel may be questionable are looming around your house, you had better take some more security precautions yourself. Familiarity does breed contempt, Many places get robbed or broken into due to the familiarity and access the transgressors get for the area and premises. I feel that the chances are remote that my house will be randomly picked as good pickings. But if my neighbors are entertaining types that are entertaining thoughts of breaks ins, my odds go way up, as they have a reason to be in the vicinity, can case the property and my movements and have easier access. So,yes, when there are a lot of people coming and going near you, it makes your place more open to consideration for uninvited guests.</p>