<p>I agree, you will feel more comfortable if you have a security light or motion detector light installed. Plus if it’s annoying enough, people won’t part near your house and set it off. Just make sure any other neighbors aren’t impacted by a motion detector light. </p>
<p>Well I thought the Gdtr was gone but last night I saw her get in the car with someone at 11:45. I don’t know if she ran out of her supply or got worried that the neighbors (mainly me) were suspicious, but I am grateful to have these past few days with less “traffic” going on. I still plan to mention this “off the record” to the police detective.</p>
<p>Does anyone have any recommendations for lights? The other exterior lights on my house turn on and off with a switch. I have looked into motion detector lights, but I really would like one that stays on until I turn it off, in case I want to work on a project in my driveway after dark, especially in the winter when it gets dark so early. I have wanted a light for years, but there is no wiring over there so I will have to hire someone to crawl around in the attic. Hiring people is a pain in the rear when you work full time and are only home on the weekends, so I have never gotten around to having the light installed in the past 23 years. It just never was a priority. At another house I lived in, there was one on a detached garage that came on automatically at dusk but it didn’t really put off much light, just made the area glow. </p>
<p>You can get a feature with the lights that they come on at dusk and stay on until dawn. </p>
<p>Most lighting systems that have motion detectors also usually have the ability to set them into ‘always on’ mode when you want the lights. I agree getting an outside set of lights is a good thing, it makes it a lot less friendly to be out at night if doing something shady. If your street has no streetlights or very few, you having lights will help discourage if something untoward is going on.</p>
<p>I think this does need to be reported, if something is out of character for your area, you will know it. If it worries you there probably is a reason for it, and the idea of ‘innocent until proven guilty’ is a legal concept, not one in terms of keeping safe, or assuming this is ‘young people’s lifestyles’. What is really worrying to me is the mother is living there, that kind of indicates that whatever is going on, she at least knows about it, and in some way approves of it, doesn’t exactly sound like mom herself is all that much either, given the background you have given, a normal parent would be wondering, even with a 28 year old child, what the heck people were coming and going at all hours…sounds like GD didn’t fall far from the tree I would hazard a guess, if mom lives there and turns a blind eye.</p>
<p>Most police departments have community service officers who are there to help with things like this, or find out who the detective is who uses your office and give him a call and ask him what to do. Even assuming the activity is legal, most towns have laws on the books about disruptive behavior and such. In the meantime, by all means get lights installed, I am sure there is an electrician willing to do the work on a saturday when you are there, sometimes the so called “handyman” services are a better bet, they tend to be more flexible IMO.</p>
<p>The daughter has been known to have a drug problem. I am guessing the Gdtr does, too, or she would have custody of her kids. Neither of them work and never have as far as I know.</p>
<p>I am wondering if it may be sex and not drugs. I only see young men over there, and the cars stay for a while–longer than I would think a drug deal would take. This afternoon, I returned from the grocery store and there was a red car parked at the curb next to my driveway (across from their back gate) with the motor running. I looked and there was someone sitting in the passenger seat. Of course, it’s windows were tinted so it was hard to get a good look, but it looked like a young man to me. Fifteen minutes later, the car was still there, the driver still absent. Hmmmm. I had to leave again, so I didn’t see who got into the car or how long it stayed.</p>
<p>My thought being if it was just a friend visiting her, then why did he leave the other guy in the car for so long? It was hot today. I’m sure the car was running to keep the a/c on.</p>
<p>I don’t know why you are waiting so long to talk to the police. This sounds like an awful lot of activity, so what if it is quiet a day or two? Why would you think she was suddenly gone if she has lived there so long anyway?</p>
<p>I realize there is a tendency to not get involved in other people’s business. That said, it can be a positive thing to report suspicious activity. There is nothing to lose. Look at the woman who reported what she felt was suspicious at a storage facility recently in Minnesota and it turned out that the suspicious teen was planning a mass murder type thing with his family and his high school. If not for her tip off, the outcome might have been very different. </p>
<p>I would not call or go over to the neighbors about this matter. You can call the police and tell them what you have shared here. You can say you feel hesitant since you are not sure anything is truly amiss, but you are concerned about this unusual activity at your neighbor’s house and describe your observations and say the concern is greater because elderly people also live in the home. What is there to lose? Tell the authorities you would appreciate that they keep your “report” confidential when looking into the matter. They will advise you as to whether there is some cause to look into it further. Why wait at this point? Maybe the young woman has a lot of visitors and that is all. But if you say her mom has a drug problem and the young woman has had her kids taken from her, maybe things are not on the up and up over there and you are onto something. If not, no harm has been done.</p>
<p>I am hesitant because I don’t have any proof that anything is going on and I don’t want to cause a rift with the neighbors. I plan to live here a long time and I know they will live there forever, too, as they will inherit the house when the parents die. I do plan to talk to the police, but I don’t want to call 911 and have a record of it on file. I don’t want the neighbors to be able to find out that I am the one who called. I live alone and am worried about retaliation. The GDtr has not lived there continuously. They kick her out periodically and let her come back. </p>
<p>No one is saying to call 911. It’s not an emergency. Walk into the police station and tell them your concerns including that you don’t want to be identified as the one filing this report. Make sure you have the name of the medical supply company prominently mentioned too, so that they can be brought into this. </p>
<p>You’d look awfully foolish if the neighbors were indeed being held hostage or neglected in there. There really isn’t anything you can do if these are your new neighbors and they even are carrying on with nefarious things without you and the authorities getting proof of them. I am concerned with the elderly neighbors who you have not even seen in a while. The other things are just extras, that Ihink are going to be the new normal for your next door neighbors and you.</p>
<p>I gather from what the OP has shared in this thread, the way things are laid out in her neighborhood/street and the placement of their houses, etc. would leave little room for imagination who notified the police if they showed up, and she is afraid of retaliation. I can respect that, but am hoping there’s a creative way to work around the problem. </p>
<p>I think the key to it is perhaps the home health aide who is coming several times a week. I’d like to think there might be a way for the police to make some inquiries that makes the family wonder if the home health aide to do it. In fact, an anonymous call to the home health agency might be one way to deal with it. As someone mentioned upthread, they are mandated reporters. It’s up to them or the police to figure out what activity is or isn’t going on, whether it’s abuse/neglect or not.</p>
<p>teriwtt is correct that I would be the first one suspected if the police showed up. The people behind me might be able to see what is going on, but they haven’t lived there very long and I don’t feel comfortable talking to them about it. To be honest, I’m not sure whose side they would be on as I don’t really know them very well. They are much younger than I.</p>
<p>I’m not really worried about the grandparents being abused or neglected. The fact that home health is coming and that the grandparents seem to be in control of the car keys makes me think they are still in charge. I am away from home (at work) for eight hours during the day, so I am missing the opportunity to see them during the daytime.</p>
<p>I will talk to the police next week. At the very least, maybe they could start patrolling the street and make it uncomfortable for the back-gate guests. Thanks for all of your encouragement. I’ll let you know what the police say.</p>
<p>Have you noticed whether the activity declines with the home health aid visits? I would contact the police and trust them to protect your privacy.</p>
<p>From the get go when you report your concerns/observations to the police, say that you are hesitant as you don’t want to be identified as the “reporter” and you are concerned that they look into it in a way that would protect that confidentiality…in fact, you could bring that up FIRST in the conversation with police before getting into the specifics of your concerns with the unusual activities. </p>
<p>If bad actors are visiting next door it will eventually spill over. </p>
<p>I do understand why you are waiting but call the non-emergency number. </p>
<p>I talked to the police detective today. They will start patrolling the neighborhood more, and he was going to talk to a narcotics officer and maybe do some undercover surveillance. He said if I saw anything else, to call 911 and tell them I want to remain anonymous, but if the cops tell them they received a report of weird things going on, they will know it was me. Maybe she will sell whatever she’s selling to an undercover officer and get caught that way. And as luck would have it, there has been no activity over there for the past two days! </p>
<p>I’m not too worried about the young guys over there in broad daylight, but that 4 a.m. incident kind of unnerved me. I mean, how many of us have THREE flashlights in our cars? I would be hard-pressed to find one. And I don’t think any of my passengers carry their own personal, full-sized flashlight. That was just very strange. </p>
<p>Drug dealing and abuse is on the rise in a lot of areas. A non-blood relative of mine has had issues in their home with their younger son. He was selling drugs out of their home a few years ago. Not only was he caught and arrested but so was the father ( I assume a neighbor tipped of police because of the same activity you describe ) Father and mother claimed to have no knowledge but no one believed they could b so blind.
Recently , the same young man was involved in a botched armed robbery with an accomplice. Still drugs are behind the crimes. </p>
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<p>These days everyone who has a smart phone has a very powerful flashlight app. Not that that has much to do with the problem going on next door, but just don’t read too much into people having flashlights available. </p>
<p>I am sorry you are having to deal with this I know it can be scary. We had a lot of strange activity going on with a neighbor at our old house. It turned out all of the weird cars we saw coming and going were FBI agents on a sting operation. You never know what is going on. If the visits were just during the day I would be tempted to think perhaps Craigslist. There could be other reasons for the activity, but if it makes you uncomfortable, you need to follow your gut. I am glad you got the ball rolling with the police. </p>
<p>A thousand years ago, my dad was a sheriff - when we were kids he instilled this piece of advice “would YOU want to know?” - in this case, I most certainly would want to know. I would not discuss it with the neighbors, I would, as suggested above, contact the police and report exactly what I have seen. I would then sit back and let the authorities handle it. Stay out of it, do not let your neighbors know (any of them) that you spoke with the police. Be as “surprised” as all the others. </p>
<p>Our police department advises, “If you see something, say something.” Good advice, but I hate to falsely accuse anyone.</p>
<p>I hadn’t even thought about the flashlight app on phones. These were all round lights which could very well have been phones. No activity over there today, or the last three days.</p>