I am a freshmen at Temple University in PA, but I am from Boston Mass. Temple and UMASS have given me almost the same financial aid so there is no real difference there. I might even save money if I find a cheap apartment to rent in Philly. A lot of my friends and my brother go to UMASS and so I think it would be a good fit for me socially, but the “zoo” is known for drinking and I don’t know if that’s all I want to do on the weekends. I’ve only been at Temple U for about 3 months, but I have been having trouble adjusting socially. I live in a 4 person suite, and I get along with the two girls in the other room well, but not my roommate. My roommate is a junior transfer so I guess they put her in our dorm because there was no other space, but we don’t even say hello and goodbye and it has gotten very uncomfortable. The other two get dinner with me occasionally but they are close to home so they usually go there on the weekends and I have to find plans texting people I’ve only met once or twice. These people are generally welcoming but I get the sense that I don’t fit in with most of them.
I was taken off the waitlist at UMASS for the spring semester and was almost sure that I was going to go, but now that I am at Temple I’m having trouble imaging myself there. I don’t have many friends but I think the city is really cool and I’ve gotten involved in some clubs and volunteer groups. I’m hoping some friendships will develop there but so far they haven’t.
Another aspect is that I don’t feel challenged at Temple right now. I’m not sure if thats because I’m a first semester freshman and most of our classes are easier, or if i want to pick a more challenging major, or if it is really the nature of the school.
Im trying to be optimistic that things will get better here, but I’m growing more introverted and lonely than I have ever felt and I don’t want that to affect me too long. I’m really split on whether I want to go to a higher ranked school (if that matters) or if I want to stay in a new city and learn more about myself.
(sorry for the long post but I’m very conflicted)
Go to the counseling center on campus, and make an appointment to talk through all of your situation. Some of what you are experiencing is just because you are a first semester freshman. However, there could be other factors at play.
Philly is a great city, so for the time that you have there, do get out of your room and explore it - even if you do that on your own. Don’t expect your roommate to be your best friend. As long as you both are civil to each other, things are fine. If you like the other suitemates, maybe you could go home for the weekend with one or the other of them sometime. That would give you another new thing to do.
Thanks for the feedback. I think I’m going to try the counseling center but I’ve heard they take a while to schedule an appointment.
I’ve gone to a few concerts alone, and I generally find places to eat on my own and things like that, but it has given me a lot of anxiety. Still, I joined a volunteer team off campus so I’m hoping that helps.
I have friends whose kids had a bad fit with roommates and they have changed rooms the next semester- perhaps you could look into that too?
I know one of the best ways to meet kids is through club sports. Perhaps you could try club running -there are many first time runners there - and train for a 5k this would give you something to look forward to along with a way to connect with different people every day (most runners run daily) or I have heard the rock climbing and yoga clubs are fun at Temple. You can be a newbie in the sport as most clubs LOVE introducing their sport to others.
If athletics aren’t your thing how about band … or they have a food co-op called the RAD cafe that grows and serves food on campus and in the community- that would be a group of people you could connect with several times a week- they are always looking for help…
If nothing on campus feels right there are volunteer groups outside of campus in Philly and I have heard of a website or app called ■■■■■■■■■■ that isn’t a dating site but people with like interests looking to do events together like bike rides art events etc… I have heard of kids connecting through that site and making friends … hope this helps, don’t give up there are lots of friendly people in Philly looking to expand their circle of friends.