<p>Isn’t D the one who will decide whatever the reason is? It is not clear why parent has a question in regard to a future college. Or parent is asking for D? I am confused.</p>
<p>Just got the memo…this is a test for a possible new Fox comedy show…Jack Bauer is secretly trying to find out if there are enough possible viewers…he shoots, he scores! </p>
<p>Now it is up to you to name the show…hmmm, let’s see, I bet curm can come up with a few zingers! :)</p>
<p>Well, this thread surely is doing well in the ratings when it comes to entertainment value!</p>
<p>It is a funny thread, soozie, but I wish the OP were a genuine ■■■■■. Unfortunately, I don’t think she is. I think she’s a dead serious mom, and I feel awful for this kid.</p>
<p>And to think it adds to our post count too. Who could ask for more?</p>
<p>Owlice, got any scones this morning? An please serve the toast and jam in silver toast racks. Those are so elegant.</p>
<p>Although I laughed so hard at work yesterday I had to close the door to my office, I think in the serious realm tk has it right on page 18. To go a bit further than this, it could be that the reality of the dominant crass culture in this country has finally hit the OP, and she hopes that D will set her sights higher in life than having peers who believe that wearing diaper pants (looks like you’re carrying a load), a baseball cap with a sideways bill, and – for the other gender-- that the low-class clothing of streetwalkers are all status symbols. It’s pretty depressing, even to many of us natives who are also parents. </p>
<p>Also, in some other countries it is not necessarily gauche to seek out loud a place in a class which does indeed (“snobbily”) look down upon others who are seen as having crass standards.</p>
<p>So if the OP has her goals right but her methods wrong, the way for both her and her D to associate with people of high quality is to be of high quality oneself and become a genuine friend, which will attract similar others to oneself. (In this country which values individualism in theory, one can develop a group by writing the rules.) :)</p>
<p>If by chance wjb is correct and the OP’s post is a serious question, I am hopeful that the daughter will establish her comfortable circle of friends (who will hopefully be acceptable to her parents) no matter wher she attends. In retrospect, the OP’s dau might have considered a school with sororities, so that those connections could possibly have been made. </p>
<p>As an aside, when I was in college, I found the blueblood crowd to be less serious about academics and more serious about social climbing and earning that coveted “MRS” degree. Several classmates had “well known” last names and were from the “right” families. I have no clue what any of them are doing now. My group of “lowlife” friends are doctors, attorneys, etc. Oh, except my one friend who we called a “preppy reactionary”. She was a second generation (mom was an alum of the school) – attended the “right” prep school, etc. We called her preppy reactionary because she used to wear a blazer, button down blouse with the peter pan colllar and prep school signet ring with jeans and hiking boots. She now lives on a horse farm in Montana with a guy shes been with forever (but never married) and her dogs. Oh, the shock, the horror, the scandal.</p>
<p>wjb, I agree that the OP is not a ■■■■■. She is serious. I believe based on her posts here that she is related to ParentofIvyHope and it all fits. So, that is why I said I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. The topic makes me wanna cry. However, the responses by our witty and well informed CC members have cracked me up. </p>
<p>I realize that the OP and her husband are from a different culture. But I was encouraged when ParentofIvyHope’s thread/story ended with that the mom and dad were NOT going to move with D to Boston while she attended MIT, but just go for one week. But even if that has been solved, it seems that the mom is still trying to impact her D’s choice of college…which apparently seems to be MIT…and I just think that if you let your kid apply to certain schools, and then they actually get admitted, that you don’t then pull the plug of where they can go or tell them where they can go (unless it has to do with the FA package which doesn’t seem to be in this case). I urge the OP to let her D go with her own choice. She is becoming an adult. Time to let go. </p>
<p>And for the parent…be happy with ANY of these schools! We’re talking Princeton, Stanford, and MIT! It is not like MIT vs. Podunk Community College! ALL these schools will have some rich snobs and some poor schlugs. ALL these schools will have some private HS kids and some public HS kids. ALL these schools will have some who are full pay and some on financial aid. BUT one thing they have in common also…ALL these schools have very bright and motivated students who often go on to do some great things (other schools have this too of course). The OP’s daughter will meet some really neat kids at these schools. And isn’t she going to get an education after all? It is not all about who you meet or what boys she may meet. The OP’s D earned a spot at these schools for her smarts and achievements. If she wanted a dating pool, there are other ways to get that, with much less hard work.</p>
<p>Soozie – Yes. Why let your kid apply to MIT and CalTech EA if you “don’t want them at a tech school?” The time to exert influence over choices is while the list is being made, not after the acceptances roll in. Once you’ve signed off on the list, the choice should be the kid’s. Be a sounding board, help her weigh the pros and cons and sift through her priorities, but let the kid make the decision! If you force your own choice on her and her experience is unhappy, you’re the bad guy for four years. No thanks.</p>
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<p>No, not the lowly bass player. She lived with, (but to the best of my knowledge never married) Peter Wolf, who was the J. Geils lead singer.</p>
<p>@ fireandrain:</p>
<p>Excellent post, but I would guess that, in some cases, the connection between these kids stretches back further than college. Someone’s Mummy went to Farmington with someone else’s Aunt Bitsy. Two dads knew each other from the crew team at Exeter. Like that.</p>
<p>I know a woman who sent her D to an exclusive private school in Manhattan because she felt that the local private schools were just too declass</p>
<p>:: racks up the toast ::</p>
<p>:: puts scones in baskets ::</p>
<p>:: pulls fresh croissants out of the oven ::</p>
<p>Breakfast is served! We have eggs Benedict, omelettes made-to-order, and the usual assortment of jams and preserves for the baked goods. We also have 70 brie for the croissants, slightly warmed. </p>
<p>Teas available include blackcurrent, jasmine, and Gunpowder Green. For geek_mom, we have Luzianne and Red Rose. Okay, the Red Rose is really for me, but that’ll be my chaser. Coffee comes first!</p>
<p>Oh, we have fresh fruit, too, of course: strawberries, kiwi, bananas, hothouse peaches from our orchard, and mango.</p>
<p>tranquil, when I was in boarding school, some of the kids were invited not to someone’s home in the Vineyard, but to a private Greek island! Oh, flown there, too, of course, all together, and at the hostess’s expense.</p>
<p>owlice – Re post 292: This is mean. Some of us are about to tuck into the matzah (product and packaging taste roughly the same) for a solid week.</p>
<p>Thanks to the folks on the '09 thread for directing me to this one.</p>
<p>But I have to have a bit of sympathy for the OP if I try to imagine myself in a totally different culture with a bright HS senior. I’d also be trying to find a school with the “right” kind of kids (also known as the school with the best “fit.”) My criteria would probably be the opposite (looking for down to earth rather than snobs) but I might also express myself inartfully.</p>
<p>Too bad St. John’s College is not a little higher in the USNWR rankings. Then it would be the ultimate elitist college in America. 2nd oldest school in the country, everybody reads the same 100 “great books”, everybody learns ancient Greek and French, they call professors “Dons”, and the modern program was founded by a guy named “Winkie”. What’s a snob not to like about all that? Not to mention the big sport apparently is croquet, and they are very keen on ballroom dancing. It’s a little declasse to have two “branches” but if DD went to Annapolis, she could meet a very nice Navy man.</p>
<p>:::: downing handfuls of warm croissants before the week of unleavened foods begins:::::::</p>
<p>^^Smart woman. I’m eating the last of the box of Cheerios. Scrumptious.</p>
<p>While the OP did express herself using words that may not be “artful” given her cultural background and English not being her native tongue, she has posted more to clarify what she meant and it does seem she meant the essence of what she originally posted in so many words.</p>
<p>We bought a big container of black and whites from Costco on Saturday. We were fearful we’d have to freeze some during the holiday. Silly me. they are all gone. Where did they go??</p>
<p>Back to topic. Assuming the OP is of a different culture or nationality, I am curious why hanging with US blueblood snobs is a priority?</p>