<p>Maybe you can spend some time volunteering someplace else that would do some good? I don’t know the particulars about your son’s situation, but are there programs for young people that could use your talents? Sometimes all it takes is one caring person to turn a disaffected teen around and keep him or her off the kind of path that your son ended up on. </p>
<p>I know it must be frustrating, but it makes perfect sense to me that you would not be allowed to have extra contact with your son through the backdoor of volunteering at his prison.</p>
<p>I think it is a positive sign that he was allowed to request placement.
Lets hope the time goes fast& I agree about channeling your energies elsewhere.</p>
<p>You need an outlet, but something besides the prison.</p>
<p>Im thinkng of getting involved in a new cause fr me, after I heard this story.</p>
<p>My son is fine. His cellmate murdered his wife! That’s the second wife murderer my son has met at prison. He has volunteered to enter a drug treatment program at his home prison that lasts nine months. If he completes the program successfully he can leave for a half way house at that point. Sounds really good to me. In other news, my D has announced she is going back to Sweden this summer! I don’t know if she will reconnect with the ex-Swedish boyfriend but I hope not. She will be helping her ex Spanish teacher from HS. She gets all expenses plus a nice stipend!</p>
<p>Your son has shown maturity and ownership of his situation. I hope you can relax a bit. Now, do something nice for yourself: spa day, cooking class, theater show, weekend in a big city. Focus forward.</p>
<p>Your D is also moving forward with plans. Good for her! If she is supervising a group of young teens abroad, she won’t have time for the ex-BF.</p>
<p>Minimum Security prison is like a bad summer camp. Mind you, this is not in the Main Prison where there is very little sunlight and tons of razor wire. There are no bars on the windows of this section and they sleep in dorms with 16 to a room with 1 toilet, 1 sink and 1 shower(worse than summer camp). There is a pool table (donated) and the inmates have free HBO. The food isn’t too bad. I have visited 2 times and will go on Mother’s Day before I go out with the rest of my family. Sadly, I am the only allowed visitor at this time. He attends daily workshops in Rehab, but I don’t think it will have any real influence on him. If there is another arrest ,he will do REAL time (the main lockup) before any more time in a Minimum Unit like he is in now. That’s about it . Thank you for all the hugs and support I have been given</p>
<p>I’ve toured minimum security places that were better than my summer camp. Particularly the bath rooms. </p>
<p>I’m glad things are working out. </p>
<p>The cellmate reminds me of Alice’s Restaurant, the part where they put him on the Group W Bench after he says he’s been arrested. "And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest father-raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean n ugly n nasty horrible and all kinds of things, and he sat down next to me and said, “Kid, whadya get?”</p>
<p>i have a friend who had a similar circumstance. he was in a “bad prison” but in a decent area. it has, sadly, taken a few times in trouble to finally get it together. he gained all this weight before he went in so he wouldn’t be bugged as he looked big and scary. </p>
<p>now he has been out for awhile, lost 40 pounds and is almost a vegan and getting help for his temper (what got him in trouble in the first place)</p>
<p>his mom told everyone he was in rehab. wish she had said something so she could have had more support, but it was her call. i have never told her i know.</p>
<p>anyway, sending good vibes and know it can be rough but if he wants, he can really change</p>
<p>Thanks for the kind messages. I am not sleeping well and have lost 11 pounds in the last month because I have lost interest in food. My doctor says I am OK medically. The prison is really not so bad. My son has made many new friends, with a variety of backrounds. He now has a fan, a small TV and a radio. Prison in Minimum Security seems like a bad summer camp without any field trips.</p>
<p>Sorry you are having such a tough time. Perhaps you should talk to your doctor and see if something like Zoloft will help and/or maybe a sleeping pill.</p>
<p>Your son wouldn’t want you to make yourself sick on his account. Please take care of yourself.</p>
<p>You were terrified of what this prison would be like, and your worst fears were not realized. Sounds like your son is resilient and making the best of a bad situation. I hope you will be able to do the same. </p>