Signing Day!

Athletic Recruits
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<p>So today my daughter is going to sign her NLI for partial scholarship with those who are getting full rides in other sports … sigh …</p>

<p>I read the letter and that article is true! It does suck! The part I object to the most is the part about the one year commitment with the four year lock. How hard is it to get out early if things don’t go well (or if you don’t end up getting that merit scholarship to supplement the gap, as you had hoped)? Not that we have any intention of this not working out, but I don’t like the idea of her being enslaved for a relatively small amount of money per year. We can swing it for one year - but four will be tough, especially with #2 entering college in two years as well.</p>

<p>I don’t have a problem with the null and void clauses, as I don’t expect they usually happen. But the financial end worries me, because if she doesn’t get that merit aid, this will be a real strain. This truly was a blind leap of faith; it would seem she is more than qualified for the merit scholarship, but one never knows until the acceptance comes in. </p>

<p>On the amateurism questionnaire, there is a question that asks if you used any recruiting services. She was registered on berecruited - that isn’t what they mean by that, right? They mean basically did you have an agent negotiating on your behalf? (obviously not ::insert wry chuckle::)</p>

<p>And best wishes and congrats to all who are signing today or later in the week!</p>

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<p>Congratulations to your daughter! I know what you mean about the NLI, it is a pretty one-sided document. </p>

<p>Congratulations to all the other athletes who will be signing today!</p>

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<p>Congrats Wilberry and daughter… well done!</p>

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<p>What sports are included in today’s signing day? I only know about football and men’s soccer (early February signings).</p>

<p>Good luck and congratulations to everyone putting pen to paper today!</p>

5

<p>Early signing for all sports besides Football, Field Hockey, Soccer, Track and Field, Cross Country and Men’s Water Polo.</p>

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<p>The NLI is a real challenge. It underscores the need to fall in love with school first and be prepared financially to cover the tuition and expenses even if the sport does not work out.</p>

<p>My middle child made a poor college choice revolving around following a girl friend to a D2 school and his frustration with not getting the D1 offer he wanted. He made an impulsive decision and chose to attend School X on a 90% athletic scholarship, balance of cost covered by need based grant.</p>

<p>After a tough year and a little growing up, he realized that this was both the wrong program and wrong school for him. He was not meeting his academic goals and the focus of the team and his role on it was not what the coach had discussed during the recruiting process. He had a discussion with his coach at the end of the year and got his letter of release.</p>

<p>The constraints:

  • He could not transfer and play at any other school in his conference.
  • He could transfer and play at other D2 schools right away (problem with D2 is that only a handful are reasonably challenging - most have basically open admissions - he wants a more challenging school.
  • Transferring to a D1 program and playing entails sitting out from the sport for a year.</p>

<p>He chose to attend school at home part time this year while he sorted out his options and made the “right” choice in transferring to another schoo… The biggest obstacle with leaving a program after a year like he did is that unless you were a star as a freshman (a tough combination of skill and opportunity), it is very difficult to jump start a recruiting process. There are no travel teams or exposure events for transfers laying out for year. No venue for you to be evaluated and a raft of NCAA restrictions regarding how and where the coaches can see you.</p>

<p>He is determined to play and has started discussion with a handful of schools, but the outcome is uncertain.</p>

<p>We continue to have the discussion regarding “it’s not “if” you stop playing, but “when” you stop playing.” His non-playing option is our state flagship university, a Top 25 National University per USNWR.</p>

<p>Morale to this story. Fall in love with the school first. Make sure it maximizes your academic goals. Try and get the best fit possible with the coach and program, but be prepared to continue at the school without the sport or scholarship if necessary. This is a hard reality. If my son had wanted to stay at School X, it would have been beyond our means. Inject both financial and life reality into your athlete’s school choice decision.</p>

<p>This has been a hard-won learning experience for my middle child. His younger brother, also an athlete in his junior year in high school, is benefitting greatly from these lessons.</p>

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<p>^
Great post. Great lessons shared.</p>

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<p>Yes, great post - I guess you can always transfer to D3 with no issues. Hopefully it all works out. My daughter feels very positive about her school choice, and I agree. I tried to make sure she chose for the right reasons, and I do believe that she did. I hope things work out for your son. Tough luck, huh :-(</p>

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<p>It can be frustrating seeing your athlete get off track. On the other hand, we spend so much of our time, energy, emotions, resources, love, etc. paving the road for our kids, creating opportunities, steering them in the right direction, etc. that I often wonder how well we are teaching them how to manage adversity or respond to a bad turn of events or a poor decision.</p>

<p>Since my middle child has been back at home this year sorting through what “his” right path is (see earlier post), I have seen increasing emotional growth and a growing understanding of the balance between freedom and responsibility. Much more so than during his high school years when his mom and I were more engaged in “helping” him navigate his way through school and sports. I think back on all of the organizing, coordination, behind the scenes directing that we did to “support” his athletic and educational ambitions. In fact, I think he may have made a more balanced life/school decision if he had had more his own skin in the game in fully understanding what was involved in selection process and all of the non-sports implications of his decision.</p>

<p>The opportunities that the kids of many of the posters on this board have only present themselves to one in ten thousand (or maybe a million). It is a special alchemy of hard work, athletic talent, intelligence, and a large dash of privilege and families that can show them the path.</p>

<p>My youngest son is at a boarding school with a support community that is helping him find this path, thanks to basketball, a good mind, and his own hard work. A helicopter-parent free environment. High emphasis on self-reliance. I have been in withdrawal for two years - we are too far away to attend the games. Minimal engagement with the coach. No trainers to identify and manage. The management of the balance between school, studies, sports, and travel is his alone. He is managing his recruitment with his coach. A level of independence that may have helped his older brother.</p>

<p>Yet I would not bet against my middle child. His educational choice and life decisions are being tempered in the forge of adversity, taking and accepting responsibility for his own decisions, and owning the outcomes. I had a high school teacher who once told me that anything you accomplish is life is IQ times I Will. Sometimes its not such a bad thing to encounter a few bumps in the road. It’s good for the character and can really increase the “I Will” variable.</p>

<p>Congrats and best wishes to all the recipients of Likely Letters and signees of NLIs this month. Carpe diem!!</p>

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<p>Congrats to those signing AND getting scholarships. Consider this–
That’s really a “two -for” bonus—getting into the school where you can play AND some $.
Many many athletes do go onto collegiate sports without the big $.
Fewer get into the college of their choice with their sport…</p>

<p>So its all good. really, it is…</p>

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<p>bballdad, you make a good point again - as I said, the school my daughter will be attending is a co-op school. we went to a presentation last weekend and the co-op director addressed that issue. She said that if she offers a co-op and the student says, I have to talk to my parents, she tells them - well you can <em>talk</em> but this is your life now, and your decision. </p>

<p>Which made me think. I offer my advice often - unsolicited or otherwise - I guess all we can do is hope that we have given good advice and they will be able to think that way for themselves when the time comes to do so - or to think better!</p>

<p>I am sure there are many roads to the right outcome … just because one had a ‘bump’ doesn’t mean he won’t turn it around. Adversity is not always a bad thing in retrospect!</p>

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<p>bballdad, thanks for posting your middle son’s story. You are a good father to recognize the uniqueness of each of your children and to provide each of them with the support and space they need. I hope you’ll update us on your second son’s next steps. </p>

<p>Someone else on CC was responding to a parent’s lament that they couldn’t fix all the bad things. The response reminded the parent that we wouldn’t be the people we are today without the bad stuff as well as the good, and that even if we could, it wouldn’t serve our children well to keep them wrapped in cotton wool.</p>

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<p>^^Great post riverrunner. It is so true that we are all the result of the life experiences we have had, both good and bad. Without the bad, we wouldn’t appreciate the good. And the bad is truly character building, with life lessons learned. Not always such fun or easy lessons though…! Putting our children in a “safety bubble” or cotton wool, as tempting as it may be, does them no good ultimately.</p>

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<p>I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.
Michael Jordan</p>

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<p>^^I’d say my daughter fails more than 50% of the time. And the odd thing is everyone thinks she wins all the time. I watched her lose every single competition for 12 months, and often lose badly. But she kept coming back for the love of it, and that is the greatest gift she’s received from her sport.</p>

<p>I suspect most of the athletes represented on these boards do the same, they never give up! And that is why they are winners.</p>

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<p>Congrats to everybody who has signed their NLI! Just one word of warning: It does happen that a student’s admission doesn’t get through or is reneged IF s/he does not maintain the grades.</p>

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<p>Recently heard about many signings for</p>

<p>baseball
softball
swimming</p>

<p>and hear a signing for womens soccer will be coming as well as one for track/cc</p>