<p>So far I’m texting in the venetian blind and the blind Venetian. Tickles my fancy.</p>
<p>But I bet Bob was a big hit with his buddies…</p>
<p>
I’m just waiting for TheDad’s quote about Jungian negligees…</p>
<p>aries-
I’d forgotten about that! You have a great memory!</p>
<p>Thank you. ::Bows::</p>
<p>At about age ten my son told me he hands down had the scariest costume possible for trick or treating. He came downstairs in a suit and tie with a mens dress hat and an ID badge that read IRS.</p>
<p>When my wife was pregnant, we once went to a halloween party dressed as a num and a priest. She was “Mother C<strong><em>” and I was “Father B</em></strong>_”</p>
<p>We won the best costume award.</p>
<p>Okay, now I know we’re living in the Twilight Zone. We hadn’t seen SluggJr since we dropped him off at his dorm 4 weeks ago…Well, we threw his sh*! toward the Davis water tower and peeled out, but anyhoo, he was home last weekend. And, he was a model sluggcitizen. :eek:</p>
<p>::::A faint Scooby-Doo style, “Humh?” is heard from a dark and hazy corner of Sinner’s Alley::::</p>
<p>No, really. Except for the newspapers on the garage floor and several gallons of open house paint, the scattered paint brushes, and the Jackson Pollock paint job he did on one of his electric guitars, the weekend was pretty uneventful. </p>
<p>This inspired artistic event took place after he got home from a concert in San Francisco around 1 a.m. on Sunday morning. It was a classic sluggparent “What-the-*?!” moment when we discovered that a roving band of artistic hellraising elves had snuck into our garage during the night and gone ape-sh!#-crazy with one of the guitars. I wondered why a guitar neck was lying on the kitchen table when I shuffled toward the coffee pot that morning. Actually, it was not unusual to find guitar parts on the kitchen table because SluggJr likes to change the pickups, but I did not expect to find a tribute to Abstract Expressionism on my garage floor. :o</p>
<p>Then, I couldn’t find my hair dryer. The artiste needed it to speed-dry his guitar. He didn’t have a ride back to the dorm, so we volunteered to take him. When we got there, he ran ahead of us to parent-proof the room, and if I didn’t know better, I’d say that he was happy to have us check out the new sluggdigs. The refurbished Jaguar looked pretty sharp on its stand in the corner next to the ginormous Orange amp. He hurried us out when a girl from across the quad invited him to make fettucini and Alfredo sauce with the rest of the dorm.</p>
<p>And, if I really didn’t know better, I’d say that he came home last weekend because he was homesick and wanted to see us. Nah…it was Ernie, the chief Keebler elf. ;)</p>
<p>Are we having a Halloween parade in the Alley?! :)</p>
<p>ROTFLMAO to post 4248… oh my.</p>
<p>Dig: When I was pregnant my H and I went to a halloween party as a pregnant nun and he was a rabbi. We also won the top prize. Boy was that costume hot!</p>
<p>The rabbi’s?</p>
<p>No the nun costume…it was authentic and I was 9 months pregnant. Those nuns must really suffer in the summer.</p>
<p>For a minute I thought you meant the other kind of hot. After all this is Sinner’s Alley.</p>
<p>Slugg - can you send me some of whatever SluggS is drinking now? That is the sure way to make a fortune if I can replicate it…</p>
<p>There must be something about nuns and clergy…</p>
<p>When I was in college, I worked as a barmaid one night a week. For the bar’s Halloween party, I dressed as a minister (wearing a Roman collar); I was pre-seminary at the time so it seemed appropriate, and one of my religion profs lent me the shirt with the collar for the evening. Made the best tips ever that night; I think people were feeling guilty!</p>
<p>When my daughter was a junior in HS, she went to school dressed as a nun. This was her response to a lot of the grief she had been taking about her choice to remain a virgin (when many of her friends were “experimenting”); she decided to respond to the pressure with humor. When she got to school, she discovered that most of the female teachers had also dressed as nuns. Unbeknownst to her, they were planning to do a “Sister Act” at the school assembly that day; when they saw my daughter dressed as a novice, they grabbed her and included her in the act. She was pulled out of most of her classes that day to rehearse with the teachers; when some of her friends expressed envy at her good luck, she replied, “I told you there were advantages to being a virgin…!”</p>
<p>Alumother: Move over Demi Moore! 9 months prego and I was “hot”!</p>
<p>So let’s get practical. Here are the real problems with turning 50. Please join me in drowning our shared sorrows, and if you’re not there yet, (you know who you are…), then toast to denial for a few more years.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>You really truly can no longer function without reading glasses. Ever try to see your credit card number with the naked eye? God knows whose account you would be charging.</p></li>
<li><p>Things that used to ache occasionally are now on permanent strike. Used to grunt only when I sat down, a little “oof”. Now I do it when I stand up too.</p></li>
<li><p>Talking to yourself. And, you sound like your mother when you do it.</p></li>
<li><p>And most dauntingly, at least from a conceptual standpoint, you have to say things like “Yes, when I was in India that’s how it was. Of course, that was 25 YEARS AGO, so it may no longer be valid.” In other words, things I did in my adult life now happened a full generation ago.</p></li>
<li><h1>4 leads to #5. Now you work with people to whom you can say, “If I’d been unlucky in college I could have been your mother.”</h1></li>
</ol>
<p>Never mind existential angst about the prettiness fairy. I just wish the world didn’t look like I have mayonnaise in my eyes…</p>
<p>m&sdad: HAHAHAHAHA!</p>
<p>Alumother: so true. And the numbers in the phone book are smaller, too.</p>
<p>And you say, “yeah, when I was on campus” and then realize nobody cares because it was before they were born.</p>
<p>Geesh…the day I turned 50, my arms suddenly got shorter. I couldn’t hold the paper or my books far enough away to read the print! How does that happen. No one ever said our arms were going to shorten!!! For those of you familiar with the Thomas Guide map book, (a necessity in southern california),: I am absolutely convinced that those 5 square mile pages, now have 10 square miles per page and the print is half the size. God help me if I get lost at night and need to read that dang map book to find my way.<br>
Trouble is, the distance vision is still ok…so I either need to get reading glasses and put them on/off as needed, which leads to putting them down and not finding them when I need them…or get some of those kitchy 1/2 glasses and a chain for around my neck to hang them. How’s that for looking 50!</p>
<p>bloocru:
I say go for the pointy cat-eye glasses, with rhinestones, embrace your age and be “vintage”</p>
<p>Alu you forgot one:</p>
<ol>
<li> You are now old enough to instinctively notice some sexy guy, then realize that you are old enough to be his mother.<br></li>
</ol>
<p>That one HURTS.</p>