<p>Feeling a little melancholy as the days tick down to DD leaving. It is such a weird mix of elation and sadness. D & future roomie have connected; twin XL stuff bought-- Bed Bath & Beyond will have our pile waiting-- meal plan chosen, physical done, etc, etc. </p>
<p>But I keep wondering if I’ve left anything out. Not school stuff, but life stuff. Essential things moms are supposed to tell their daughters, essential things human beings are supposed to know.</p>
<p>Poor D, I find myself answering her simplest questions in complex “a,b,c,d” form-- I know I won’t ever get a chance at that question again, so I’d beter really cover it. Luckily she is really tolerant of me.</p>
<p>I half feel I will wake up in September screaming at 3 am and thinking OMG!! I never told her about <strong><em>X</em></strong>!!! </p>
<p>That’s me in the back booth, crying in my mojito. Pull up a chair & join me. </p>
<p>This thread better survive till September, because at that time I am going to need you all to buy me a few rounds!</p>
SBMom, that seems to be the syndrome. In my case, I KNOW there are things not yet said. Problem here is S is not tolerant of me/us. We try to slip in a few ideas, but the chances are fewer and fewer. Right now I"m planning a blitz in the last days before lift-off. But whether I’ll act on the plan???</p>
<p>SBMom, you, as often, echo words I have said only recently. I too keep thinking - What have I not told her? And I know the answer. I haven’t told her about boys, not in depth. She hasn’t had a boyfriend for more than 1 month yet, and him she didn’t even really like. So I’d be telling it to her at such an abstract level I haven’t said much. What do I say now?</p>
<p>I confess. I just made the plane reservation yesterday to take her back. It’s just me going, because S will be in school already. So she and I will be spending two days in NYC, shopping, staying in a cool hotel, and seeing Broadway shows. Then down to NJ to drop her off. </p>
<p>I’m a planner. And I put off making this plane reservation forever. Hotel was made, theater tickets, etc. Plane was last. You know why? I realized with shock that I had to make two separate reservations, the one where I return in September and the other where she doesn’t come back until the end of October. </p>
<p>Cheers put it best, I think. She talked about the river of unconditional love that runs through young families with right-as-rain sweetness. I have mangled the line but it struck me so. This is my first child to go. I can remember her as a baby, and it wasn’t an easy time for me, nursing and post partum and anxiety and still. And still.</p>
<p>SBMom, I know that shortly before my son left for college, I sat down with him and told him some things about my life before he was born that I had never said, but felt that he should know. I must have bored him to death! But he listened politely, if not saying much. This wasn’t advice, it was about some experiences I had that were not the kind of things you discuss with children… but somehow I felt that for him to truly know and understand me, he had to know these things… and also there was something to be learned from it, and I didn’t want him repeating the same mistakes, or at least tread the same paths without the benefit of my experience. </p>
<p>I don’t know if the talk meant anything to him, but somehow it made me feel better. So I definitely know how you are feeling, even though it is now almost 5 years since I had that conversation with my son. I always had the kind of relationship with my son where we were very close but seldom talked about personal/family issues of importance. So I tried to push it all in at the end in one big monologue.</p>
<p>Where’s the damn soju? Gimme a glass. If no soju, fine, sake. Even the Ivy legacy crowd needs a drink some times. And BTW, I drove up in a 12year old Previa. A heap with no ironic style whatsoever…</p>
<p>Don’t worry I got your back. I will bring handcloths as hankies and tissues will be of no use. You really have to find the thread about last years dropping off the kids to college. I was the one who after drop off was wailing, my baby is with those people and got sick. Yes, I can defintely laugh at it now but a year ago it was not a pretty sight. </p>
<p>Curm and Doddsdad had better increase the regular order for next month and put some really upbeat music in the juke box </p>
<p>Alu, </p>
<p>NYC Sales Tax-Free Week is August 30 - September 5, 2005. Will you be here for it?</p>
<p>Sybbie - OMG we will be there from August 31-September 3. I guess I can buy her a real East Coast coat, huh? I still have the black cashmere coat I bought at Saks as a 22-year old. And it looks perfect. I think it has imprinted on my Ds brain and she wants one like it…</p>
<p>Maybe I have told her the important things. JK.</p>
<p>I’m with you, too, SBMom. We will leave August 22 to take our youngest to Indiana U. I can’t believe it is coming so soon! It won’t quite be an empty nest yet, since college-graduated son is home for awhile. Still… I will really miss the young 'un. I just KNOW I will cry when we say good-bye…</p>
<p>And I’ve never HAD a black cashmere coat. (or wanted one, for that matter–OK, so I’m not even sure what a cashmere coat LOOKS like. I can’t help it if I’m just a naive, country gal.)</p>
<p>And Susantm, the wonderful thing about Sinner’s Alley is that we all take off our coasts and hang them on the long row of coat hooks at the door. Some of us who spend too much time here have coats underneath the others that we’ve forgotten about. And if anyone gets cold, it’s understood they can borrow whatever they like as long as they bring it back some day.</p>
<p>I would have edited my post BTW but cannot from my current location.</p>
<p>Not yet, but I think I probably skipped that conversation. She was VERY happy when, on the eve of a school trip to London, I gave her my Burberry.</p>
<p>Susantm, A black cashmere coat-- it’s exactly like a black wool winter coat only<em>much</em> softer and longer-lasting. I recall mine cost 3x as much as the wool ones. However, here I am wearing it 23 years later. So that puts the cost in perspective! Mine is a long (mid calf), shawl-collared, plain, classic, almost man-style, slim black coat-- aka “reefer.”</p>
<p>I’ll have whatever Alumother is having. Sojo, sake, just gimme some! </p>
<p>*@!%! neighbor is trying to buzzkill my Aloha. Now, we’ve got Jed and all of the Clampetts out in my front yard building the world’s ugliest, homemade fence in order to disguise the world’s most atrocious, gawd-awful addition. They’re tromping all over my weeds, which actually look better standing tall in their full, weedy glory than flattened down into a grass rug. Trying to hide that addition with a fence is like putting thong underwear on a slugg. It’s not a good idea, and it makes people run down the street screaming. :eek:</p>
<p>One of each, please. And line 'em up. Been a wild week with no signs of abatement yet.</p>
<p>To SBmom, jmmom and the other moms, take heart! This is not TEOLAWKI (the end of life as we know it) but moving to another plane. Speaking as the parent of our one-and-only about-to-become-a-soph who’s been with us all summer, while the dropping off can be emotional (ours was to a certain extent) you may be speaking with each other about more and more things come winter break or next summer.</p>
<p>Ah, Alumother and SBmom, I’m thinking the reason I know nothing about cashmere coats is that I live in the Pacific NW, where winters are moderate, and I never needed a super warm coat. </p>
<p>Dh says we’ll see if “Breaking Away” is at the video store–he’s off tonight and loves to watch videos on his night off, so that should be fun! We are enjoying planning our trip to Indiana. We plan to do some sightseeing ourselves after getting young’un settled in. That may help the transition…</p>
<p>I think I went into Imagnin once when it was in downtown seattle- they didnt have much-
of course I was raised going to fredrick & nelson- that was sad when they
closed- where was the real santa going to go?
I hate what nordstroms did to their building- but I showed them- I hardly shop there anymore- sure to make a dent in their bottom line!</p>
Luckily she is really tolerant of me.</p>