So...somebody please proof my Common App essay?

<p>I've been very...hesitant to ask for help and let some stranger read my essay, but I figure that it'd be more beneficial than harmful. I had originally been working on an essay about forks and an essay about my dad for the Common App, but this idea came to me a couple of days ago and the essay kind of just...flowed out. I've gotten very mixed reactions on this essay, some say that it's "extremely unique" and "intelligent and very much you" while some have said things like "when I read your essay I get this nasty feeling, this image of a girl with greasy, matted hair and thick framed glasses." Awesome, no?</p>

<p>Since these people that have read my essays know me all too well, I figured I'd take it to a stranger. So...somebody help? Thanks.</p>

<p>Sure send it over Just Smile.</p>