So....why are so many people difficult to work with?

Parent Cafe
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<p>I have been meaning to start this thread…and since Very Happy mentioned she was tired of the corporate world…</p>

<p>I worked many years ago for a large bank and many people working there were a little off…but in a mild sort of way…except for the guy who brought a gun to work and thought he might get attacked at any moment. He was a little paranoid.</p>

<p>I used to work on a trading floor and most traders are nuts…but that is ok…because that is expected.</p>

<p>I worked out of my house for awhile and that was good because I am
sane.;)</p>

<p>And I have been working with another company the last few years and I
am shocked by how psycho some people are. One guy is so manic-
depressive it is like working on a roller coaster…and the same guy is such a liar…he can’t remember what he says or has said.</p>

<p>My boss repeats himself 100 times usually…no exaggeration. It’s unreal.
Luckily…he is a friend of mine so I can tune him out after the 2nd time.
Then I hear him repeating himself on the phone to others.</p>

<p>Some have a hard time communicating.</p>

<p>Others are slugs…it used to take one guy 30 minutes to get lunch. Now
the boss gets it in 10 minutes. What was the 30 minuter doing for 20 minutes? </p>

<p>There are a few good people…but really…what the heck is wrong with you people?</p>

<p>Step away from your schizophrenia for a moment…you know who you are. </p>

<p>There are thousands of posters and readers on here. Some of you are
the trouble makers.</p>

<p>The lazy, do nothing, backstabbing, lying, overpaid, paranoid, psychotic, make life a little worse for those that surround you… workers and employers.</p>

<p>Fess up.</p>

<p>The rest of you…</p>

<p>What are your stories in the workplace?</p>

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<p>dstark, what did YOU have for breakfast this morning- not your usual tone, I must say!</p>

<p>Seriously, hope all is okay with you.</p>

<p>You are asking the unmentionable question, IMO, the one most of us have asked at least once. I could tell you stories about my co-workers: the lap-dancer at the sales meetings, the traders who went through at least one phone set a week, the analyst who made sure to remind me not to park in a hot place so “his pills would not melt”, the associate who slept with all her clients and bosses and co-workers for years after inviting them all to her wedding, the wife of a co-worker whom I chatted with for hours at a wedding whose body parts were found in garbage bags at gas stations all over New England after she was murdered by my co-worker/her husband, the analyst who was on the cover of the local rag in ladies underwear after he was discovered walking the streets and then thrown in jail… that is the just the start of the craziness.</p>

<p>However, on a different level, the personality traits, the incompetence, the inconvenient quirks, the tough personalities, the inane distractions- hmmm, it does make a person wonder… </p>

<p>Humans comes in a huge variety of flavors, but manners and politeness used to go a long way to smooth things out among us. I mourn the loss of all those lovely old fashioned practices. Just watch “The Office” and read “Dilbert”.
What have we wrought?</p>

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<p>I’m good.</p>

<p>I am a little tired…but I’m good.</p>

<p>I love your post, performersmom. Except for one character…I think my workplace is pretty calm compared to what you have seen.</p>

<p>How well did you know the murderer and the person who was murdered?</p>

<p>Since we are getting to some ugliness…the landlord of the building where I work…was feeling depressed…I talked to him the day
before…nothing major…pleasantries…and he went into the garage put a huge gun in his mouth…and blew his head clear off. His brain was sprayed throughout the garage. I was going to make a joke here…but I guess I won’t. It is sad.</p>

<p>I do wonder.</p>

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<p>I work in a workplace with lots of people in longterm recovery from alcohol or drug addiction, or who have children who have substance abuse problems, or parents with same; or who have managed mental health conditions of one kind or another. I have never worked in a place with such brilliant, committed, coherent, caring, profoundly gifted people in my entire life.</p>

<p>And I am very grateful. (and yes, we all have our quirks…)</p>

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<p>Unfortunately I just signed the severance agreement that prohibits my bashing the company I used to work for and all “related parties” – meaning my boss, the psycho crazy b*tch who was rude and crude to me, in front of my subordinate, who was hostile about the conversation that she knew made me uncomfortable (it was regarding flatulence, if you can believe it), and who later lied about even having the conversation.</p>

<p>But I digress.</p>

<p>There was the older man who interviewed me when I was 22 who came on to me and tried to rape me.</p>

<p>There was the alcoholic woman who shrieked at me to “just quit!” if I didn’t like the way she treated me.</p>

<p>There was the boss’s wife who brought her dog to the office every day, who would fish for the dog’s ball under the radiators by getting on all fours (the wife, not the dog) and sticking her tush in the air.</p>

<p>There was the Chairman of the Fortune 500 company I worked for who announced in a meeting that “{my First Name} is our honey” and who couldn’t understand that I might be bothered by that statement.</p>

<p>There was the woman I worked for in a very well-known, well-regarded bank who had a phobia against coming through one of the Hudson River tunnels and who was absent 40% of the time, until she went out on a psychiatric disability.</p>

<p>There was the Principal at the consulting firm I worked for who had a “business” lunch with one of our vendors and came back to the office after four hours so drunk he couldn’t dial the phone. Then, the next morning at a client meeting, he kept excusing himself to go to the bathroom, remarking at one point, “I was a bad boy yesterday.”</p>

<p>There was the co-worker consultant who stole my pink message slips when a prospect called me, not her.</p>

<p>I. Am. Tired.</p>

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<p>So sad, and scary, dstark. Please do not let all this get to you too much.
I read on a another thread that you are tired of the work situation, and that your wife is abut to lose her job. I am so sorry. Could you be feeling a little more low than usual?? Yo are usually so plucky. Please keep us in the loop, ok?</p>

<p>Life is really a circus. It is easy to see that when one works in a group! We are just a bunch of animals.</p>

<p>As to the co-worker who murdered his wife, I had the intuition to stay away from him after my first lunch with him (four years before the murder)- he just seemed weird. His history was strange, but I did not learn about that until after the murder. But his wife was DARLING- go figure… they had met at AA meetings, so there may have been some dysfunction prior to all this. I never could figure out why she married him and had 2 beautiful children with him - he was unattractive, uncharismatic to boot. Well, it ended very very badly…</p>

<p>dstark, hi!!!</p>

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<p>Well…VeryHappy…I am paid $5 everytime my boss farts. Well the first one is free. Did I mention he sits 3 feet from me?</p>

<p>I can see why you are tired…those stories you wrote are not too good. The attemptedrape story…now I am getting … Off.</p>

<p>I work a couple of days a year for Special Olympics. The quality of volunteers is so high. Life affirming.</p>

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<p>VeryHappy- here’s to hoping you find a better place, to rest and to see the sun shine…</p>

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<p>dstark, who pays you the $5? Your boss??</p>

<p>performersmom, thanks. That’s only about half of the stories on my list. I’ve begun my book, but I don’t think anyone will believe it.</p>

<p>Maybe it’s not them; maybe it’s me.</p>

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<p>Yuh, VeryHappy, truth is stranger than fiction, I always say. No one ever believes my stories either.
It is not you. The only thing that is bad is to be sensitive to all this craziness. Maybe crazy people do not notice or mind other crazies?</p>

<p>You could probably put together a really good proposal for a screen-play or or sit-com- try it!!!</p>

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<p>Feeling really good about my sole co-worker of 15 years. :)</p>

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<p>After 40+ years of working, I genuinely believe that other people were raised to be political, to sabotage their co-workers, and to not give a darn about how their behavior hurts others. I was raised to be polite, be considerate, and try to work with other people. Even the courses I took in graduate business school emphasized working together in groups and handling conflict. </p>

<p>Apparently I am not the norm in the corporate world.</p>

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<p>Not too racy or tragic, but at my very first corporate Xmas party (I was 21), my two bosses, one 35 ish and a swinger and one the father of two college age daughters, tried to remove my bra while they were dancing with me. They were only a bit tipsy, and I was stick sober, so no excuses. It was sick working with these guys…
Memories I rarely dredge up.
Then there was the client who asked me to send him a photo of myself in a bikini LOL…</p>

<p>I felt as if I had landed in a very wild frat party.</p>

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<p>VH- maybe we should find a way to work together- where have you been all this time!</p>

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<p>The people that I work with cannot take criticism in any way, shape, or form. </p>

<p>I sent my coworker a polite email just reminding her of something so that she didn’t get in trouble with the boss. She sent me back one of the worst emails I’ve ever read in my life. Thankfully, she’s gone now and I’ve found out that no one else liked her either.</p>

<p>At another job, I’ve asked numerous times for people to put detailed information into our database so that we can have information at our fingertips when taking a crisis call. It’s CRITICAL that the information goes in (and required)- literally can be a matter of life and death for us, the clients, and our other clients. People just blow it off and it makes me very angry. </p>

<p>I love my bosses, and my bosses love me, but I can’t stand incompetent people. Especially when they’re my age because it just makes my generation look very bad.</p>

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<p>Romanigypsyeyes…all generations have their crazies…history repeats…</p>

<p>Performersmom…hi. :)</p>

<p>I apologize for my species. Sexual harassment in the work place…</p>

<p>My 26 year old daughter is very open…so I am assuming sexual harassment has not been an issue.</p>

<p>I am tired. I have to work a little more with the roller coaster, pathological liar. He is very nice to me…but I know it is all an act. And…I am tired of waking up at 3:20 AM. It isn’t healthy no matter how
much sleep a person gets.</p>

<p>Baseballmom…:).</p>

<p>VeryHappy…yes. The boss does his thing…and then he pays me. He
hasn’t been drinking as much milk lately…so…it is not that bad.</p>

<p>“Life is really a circus. It is easy to see that when one works in a group! We are just a bunch of animals.”. Yes.</p>

<p>So performersmom…how are things going?</p>

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<p>dstark, I know. Doesn’t mean I have to like it :stuck_out_tongue: lol</p>

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<p>Lol…</p>

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<p>Classic case of people taking life too seriously. </p>

<p>My group’s area is considerably more noisy than everyone else’s (multimedia development, duh) and despite our old age (mostly 40’s and 50’s, a couple 20’s) we have no problems appearing to behave like frat boys… When we’re under a lot of stress (just came back from another 12 hour day) fun at work is by far the most important way to relieve it and NOT end up like OP’s coworkers…</p>

<p>So, relax and chill out. If you have time to discuss personal behaviors and office politics, you have way too much free time in your hands. We prefer more enlightened discussions such as ‘should we use C++ templates’ or ‘does Java suck’…</p>

<p>My group has very little attrition, many people are company lifers and even group lifers, and we have an awesome boss. </p>

<p>A few years someone did commit suicide at work… Nothing like coming to work and seeing police tape around the building. First reaction… “It’s an Immigration Bust, hide all the temp visa people :)”. I don’t think we stopped to consider what happened, ever. The guy’s office became lab space for a (eventually doomed) project. Are we happy it went this way? no. But, people should realize it’s only a job, and no job is worth going cuckoo over. </p>

<p>In fact, it is the rare group meeting that does not deteriorate into SNL skits… Our annual treat is the annual safety training videos… “and, what do you do if you see a coworker keeled over on the floor? nothing, he’s just pulling today’s build files off the configuration management system”… </p>

<p>Yet the same people survived a 40-50% layoff a few years back…</p>

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<p>Turbo93… I am pretty relaxed. . Just venting. I’m like the calm guy in WKRP in Cinncinnati. Can’t remember his name. Gary Sandy. ( I don’t look like him though).</p>

<p>Sounds like you enjoy your workplace…</p>

<p>“prefer more enlightened discussions such as ‘should we use C++ templates’ or ‘does Java suck’…”</p>

<p>Yeah… I know those people too. :)</p>