We went out to dinner last Friday with some people who don’t usually drink. I said something like “Are you guys planning to drink, because if not, we will get separate checks so you’re not paying for alcohol.” That’s about the extent of my questioning whether or not someone is going to drink.
Neither of my sons drink, and one has commented that it’s not fun to be around drunk people (especially the one that drops your phone and breaks it).
That’s the reason I cut way back on drinking and now it is just the way I live.
OP, you are currently a social drinker, but do you care if others you are with drink or not? Would you drop them as friends if they didn’t want to drink any longer?
“7-8 drinks a week is NOT a moderate drinker. How old are you? After 30, I think you’re far more likely to be judged negatively for drinking too much than not drinking at all.” I think this might be geographical and where I live, 7-8 drinks per week is pretty normal. A glass or 2 of wine with dinner is not unusual.
This is from the CDC:
@washugrad - I had wondered about the geography aspect of it. Not that that changes the definition posted by @oldmom4896 above. I also noticed in that CDC definition of standard drinks that beer is listed at 5% alcohol content. Many of the craft beers that are so popular now have higher ABUs (I think that is the acryonym). Interestingly, at breweries, those are always listed by each of the beer offerings. I wonder if that discclosure is a legal requirement? Since they are all coming from taps, there is no can or bottle that one can read, so I am assuming so.
I don’t think my friends are going to judge me negatively if I decide to not resume drinking once Lent is over. It will just be a new normal for me. I have historically been a person who drank. It has been enlightening to me to learn that so many on this thread are non-drinkers or drink very rarely. That is just not typical among my circle of friends. I don’t anticipate losing friends because I quit drinking. I don’t work, so the skipping post-work happy hours (or drinking club soda at them) will not be an issue I face. I can certainly see where that would be difficult as those were common during my working days back in the dark ages.
I’m reading a book on ceasing alcohol consumption called This Naked Mind and have also discovered a website called “One Year No Beer.” Both are making for interesting reading. The photos of the latter are particularly telling and often quite dramatic.
DH and I went to “The World’s Largest Non-smoking Honky Tonk” last night to take some C & W dance lessons. We went to a Mexican food restaurant beforehand, and then on to the venue. I have to say, it did feel strange going to a western dance club and not having a lick to drink (I’m doing very low carb before my D’s wedding this weekend, so no alcohol). Normally DH would have a margarita with his Mexican food and I would have some wine at the club, but it wasn’t in the plan for last night. I ate my low carb at home, so just kept him company with his dinner and Dr. Pepper, while I had mineral water only. We still had fun of course, but sometimes just breaking with a tradition or habits can seem strange. If you are giving up alcohol completely, there may be some of those kinds of moments (maybe you always have a beer at a baseball game, or wine when you go out with the girlfriends), but eventually you’ll get used to the new normal.
Good luck with your new lifestyle.
Aside from the alcohol content of various beverages, it is worth taking note of the portion size. 5 ounces of wine is not a whole lot–I measured it in the wine glasses I use at home and it’s not what you’d call a generous pour in a bar or restaurant.
I am not much of a drinker myself, although I have recently started to drink a glass of wine (a small glass–around 4 ounces!) at home some evenings. And I don’t go out much where people drink–maybe once or twice a month. Two drinks is really my limit. When I was young and foolish, that was called a cheap date!
I read this article about the rise in popularity of spirit-free cocktails (no alcohol). The spin is on increased wellness, being present, sleeping better, etc.
The OP is simply on trend!
The article does bring up some points to ponder, such as has one’s socializing begun to revolve around events with booze.
@Midwest67 - great article! Thanks for sharing it. “On trend” is not something I am usually labeled! Lol!
@Hoggirl , my family and social circle are all moderate drinkers. I think if you quit completely your friends won’t care. If you meet new people, more so if you are a couple, it could effect (affect, I never know which is correct), your social invitations.
It could even with couples you know now if both you and DH don’t drink, at certain times.
I’m another person who doesn’t care if you drink or not. I have some friends and colleagues who don’t drink because of religious reasons, some watching their health, and others who had drinking problems in the past. I can easily abstain, depending on the comfort level of those I’m around. Sometimes I just don’t feel like it anyway.
I think the people who respond to a thread like this are those who don’t drink alcohol or drink very little. The rest don’t wish to participate, lest they be judged. Either way, I have no friends who have more than one drink when out for dinner or a movie. By the CDC, a drink a day is heavy for females.
I admit then when we have a thread about how frugal we are, I’m quick to join. A fashion thread? LOL, I have nothing to add that would be helpful.
My H drank much more when he was younger than by the time we met 30+ years ago. It wasn’t a big deal one way or another. Many of his friends still drink a lot while others drink little or not at all. It’s fine with them whatever people choose.
My friends also range between a glass or more of alcohol most nights to none and it’s fine with everyone.
As far as socializing, when I’m driving afterwards, I don’t have more than 1 drink.
Interesting thread that just caught my eye. About 10 years ago, I quit drinking any alcohol because two of my kids were having problems their behaviors when drinking. After several discussions with them regarding social repercussions of quitting alcohol, I did it. Mainly, to show them that it’s not a big deal thing to some people, namely me, even though I do like a glass of wine with a meal, a sip of beer with certain foods and champagne toasts.
And I kept I up for about 8 years. I can tell you that there are social pressures and, if you enjoy drinks in certain settings, as I did, yes, you will likely miss it. I did, and I was a very low volume drinker with two glasses my max that I indulged in having maybe a handful of times during a year, with about a glass of wine average a week if added altogether. For those used to greater volume who enjoy the buzz, the relaxation, the sleep that alcohol can give as well as social inclusion and culinary pairings or just the taste of some of the drinks, it can be a deprivation of sorts. And I’m not even getting into the area of those addicted to alcohol. There can be intense social pressures to drink.
Both my guys have quit drinking altogether and I resumed drinking after they told me to go on ahead. They felt that what I missed from a glass of wine at meals and get togethers was nothing like what their attraction to drinking was. Once they got on their wagons, they have stayed. It was no longer a contest or “I’ll show you”
https://news.gallup.com/poll/184358/drinking-highest-among-educated-upper-income-americans.aspx has a survey about alcohol drinking habits by various demographic groups. Regionally, responses of non-zero drinking are highest in the east and lowest in the south.
Other demographic groups more likely to have non-zero drinking:
[QUOTE=""]
$75k income
college graduate
not a weekly churchgoer
men
age 30-49
white
liberal
Democrat
employed
married
children younger than 18 in household
live in suburbs
[/QUOTE]
Note: this survey was only whether respondents drank any alcohol, not the amount of alcohol.
cptofhehouse, interesting post.My offspring are now in their 30s, and one great relief in them being older is seeing their drinking behaviors changed from college and even grad school years. They were heavy drinkers in college and the Wisconsin influence during summer vacations home was a strong one. I was really concerned, never having been a heavy drinker myself. And part of my job is helping alcoholics withdraw, so am very aware of the dangers of excess. But they have settled into adult life without issue, at least in that direction! Though one now lives in a former Soviet block country, so perhaps I should query her more on the use of vodka at social gatherings.
Interesting.
The effects he is trying to recreate with his drug are the ones I wouldn’t personally prefer to avoid. I would be happy to pay a premium for a red wine that tastes like red wine but does not have the booze. So far, no alcohol-free “wine” has won me over (and I tried a few). Boozeless beer, OTOH, can be quite decent, but I am not a fan of beer in general.
@ucbalumnus Interesting read, though I’ll admit to wishing they had sampled more than 1009 adults as I could see that skewing the data. I also wonder how they could do regional studies with so few in each region, but I digress.
One of my lad’s colleges did an anonymous survey of students asking who had consumed even one drink in the past 30 days. 2/3rds had. This means 1/3rd did not. Since the survey was anonymous, there was no reason to lie. Those stats seem to come close to many of the numbers in the Gallop poll. Even among the highest drinking group (>75K or college graduates), 25% hadn’t had a drink within the past week. Normally we’re in that position, though our recent travels would have me answering otherwise. I know in dr offices when they ask about alcohol I put down “minimal” or similar and they often change it to none. For us it’s mainly when traveling for pleasure and/or very special occasions. Annually it works out to less than one drink per week, but I still consider us in the “drinking” group since we aren’t teetotalers.
I think those who do drink regularly assume “everyone does it” mainly because they make that choice themselves. Self selecting inner circles could also make it seem that way.
I remain glad all of my inner circles (family, co-workers, friends) don’t give a hoot one way or another. I like groups where people can feel free to be themselves!