<p>Add me to the list with an 18 yr old S (HS senior) with no permit. My D had her permit the day she turned 16, and her license exactly 6 months later. S will probably get one soon, I will start bugging him once college applications are all done. I expect he may need to drive to a job this summer. He doesn’t have many places to go now, and has some friends who drive. I have saved a lot in insurance money over the last 2 years. It really has nothing to do with the fear of driving, more laziness, in his case.</p>
<p>Someone mentioned needing to rent a car for job interviews. I flew to several job interviews when I was graduating from college, and never needed to rent a car - I always took a shuttle or cab from the airport to my hotel and the interview site.</p>
<p>Another advantage to getting the DL earlier - many states now impose ‘restricted licenses’ until 18 or so limiting who can be in the car with the inexperienced driver, etc. giving the new driver more time to gain experience before trying to handle the distractions of others and possible hijinks that might occur (even at 18, 19, 20, …), and reducing the number of people at risk. Once one is 18 the restrictions go away.</p>
<p>Just depends where you live. In some parts of the country, not having a license can be a real handicap. If you live where there is good public transportation or where you are able to ride a bike, there is no need.<br>
My S is 17 and has no interest in driving. He walks to school, doesn’t have a job. Still, I would like him to take driving lessons/get his license before college. Probably next summer. We live in a place where driving is “required.”</p>
<p>As I stated earlier, I am and advocate of at least getting the permit and starting to rack up hours. Summer internships etc could be limited w/o DL… and jobs after graduation too.</p>
<p>Another advantage for them getting a permit/license while still in HS is they can pitch in whenever you have a road trip. Our S got some of his required hours while we drove back and forth on ski trips, and visiting colleges.</p>
<p>My friend’s D is 21 and has a permit but no license.</p>
<p>My two S’s couldn’t wait to drive. Got permits at 15 and licenses one year later at 16. Our state requires having the permit for a year before getting a DL. There’s no public transportation where we live and can’t really walk to anything.</p>
<p>I’m in the “driving is a life skill” camp. Everyone (who has the opportunity) needs to at least know how to drive even if they choose to not do it often.</p>
<p>Make sure he gets a government-issued ID so that he can cash checks and get on airplanes.</p>
<p>But I think it would be better if he got a driver’s license. One day he may need one – all of a sudden.</p>
<p>During her senior year in high school, my daughter had had a learner’s permit for more than a year but had never gotten around to learning how to parallel park so that she could pass the road test. There didn’t seem to be any urgency because there was no particular need for her to drive. Then I broke my leg and couldn’t drive for six weeks. She took an extra driving lesson to learn parallel parking and got her license within a week. Without it, she would have had to drop all her extracurricular activities.</p>
<p>We said we wouldn’t let son get a license before he went to college. Well, he’s there now, and still has a permit. He will be off for five weeks for Winter Break. He took driver’s ed about three years ago, has a learner’s permit, but has had very little experience behind the wheel since. I have found a place an hour away that will give private lessons in two hour sessions, and they will administer the road test as well. I’d rather have a professional teach him, especially since he’s so rusty. Hopefully, he will have his license before he goes back for spring semester, although he won’t have a car on campus. He will have to take classes this summer, though, and we hope to have him drive to and from class, with us, to get more practice. We cannot afford a third car, and any money he earns goes to pay for tuition, not car insurance, which is very expensive in our state. We just really would feel better with him having a license before going away to college, and thank goodness, knock on wood, an emergency hasn’t come up where he’d need one this semester, but we don’t want to push our luck next semester.</p>
<p>Of course, there are no girls in the picture. I think once girls come into the picture, the boys desire for a car increases. Otherwise, they’re more than happy to use Mom the Taxi. Gosh, I really don’t miss that, now that he’s away at college.</p>
<p>My D had no desire to get her license in HS but did get a govt issued non-drivers license as ID when she turned 16. I really encouraged her to get the permit and license before she went away to college; I felt strongly that it would be a useful skill for her to have. I did not want her unable to take the wheel of a car in an emergency situation. But she just wasn’t ready, and so I did not push it because I didn’t want discomfort and anxiety to complicate the learning to drive process. She came home after freshman year, and announced, “I think I’ll work on getting my driver’s license this summer.” Very matter of fact, no drama, no high excitement, no anxiety. Took to it like a duck to water. Passed the road test on the first try. Still approaches driving like a useful, practical skill to have, like learning to do the laundry or balance a checkbook. She doesn’t love it, or hate it, she quite enjoys it when she does it, but it’s no big deal to her either way. In so many ways, we’ve let our D set her own pace about learning things, and it’s always seemed to work out fine, this was another successful example. Some things she’s done earlier than other kids, other things she’s on the trailing edge LOL…In the long run it all evens out, I think. </p>
<p>(Our insurance went up some, but she doesn’t have a car at school so it’s not as bad as it might be.)</p>
<p>It embarrasses me to admit this, but our d1 didn’t get her driver’s license until after graduating from college at the age of 20. What was I thinking? I can barely remember, but part of the problem was that dh adamantly refused to buy a third car and d1 couldn’t afford anything drive-worthy. So if I wanted a car available for work or running the other 2 kids around, I needed to transport d1 as well. Fortunately, she had friends with licenses (and usually their own, parent-purchased cars) and caught rides with them. She always gave them gas money, which made her a preferred passenger. :)</p>
<p>I’ll admit that I was nervous teaching her to drive, as well. Our hs has no driver ed program, and the only ones in the area were completely out of sync with our family schedule. I spent a lot of nights parked in front of the movie theater at 1 AM, waiting to pick her up from work. If I could do it over again, I’d find a way to convince dh we needed a third car. (As d2 observed, he had no reason to buy one as long as I was doing all the parental driving.) D1 was resigned - she’d have preferred to get the license, but didn’t have the opportunity once she got to college because she worked on campus during summers and was rarely home.</p>
<p>After graduation, she paid for a few lessons and got the license almost immediately. The funny thing now is that her job requires her to be in a car for much of the day in the Metro DC area, where driving skills are several levels up from anything required around here. She loves to drive and recently purchased a car which is several levels up from anything we’ve ever had. :D</p>
<p>I don’t know if the idea that college students would ridicule other students for not having a driver’s license is something that I’d worry about. I’m not sure that that would even happen. But I see not getting a license as a “red flag”–and makes me wonder about issues of independence and competency.</p>
<p>We live in the midwest and out in the country, ten miles from our high school. In our community, virtually all students get their licenses the minute they are eligible. My three kids got their licenses on their 16th birthdays. I was glad when they did. They were able to get to and from their jobs and activities and help move their younger siblings around.</p>
<p>Maybe I’m unfairly jumping to conclusions, but it seems to me that some of the young people I know who have postponed getting their licenses also have other issues with independence and anxiety.</p>
<p>This past year, my 18 year old high school senior has driven herself and friends to the large metro area an hour away from us to attend concerts etc. I think that learning to do this–reading maps, getting unlost, navigating in crowded areas, parking in ramps, and learning a bit of “street smarts” is part of becoming a competent human being. Driving is another skill in her tool kit.</p>
<p>I do know that in urban areas with good public transportation, my observations about getting a driver’s license may be off the mark.</p>
<p>DS is 18 and also uninterested in getting license! We pushed him to get permit and he spent some weekends practicing with his dad, but that’s been it. Partly he has no need right now - he is either home or school. Partly he knows he would not have a car of his own anyway. Mostly - he’s a very cautious kiddo who needs time/space to take major steps. Our plan is to for him to get license this summer, but he doesn’t know that yet!</p>
<p>I’d say there a few assumptions in this post. At my kids HS I’d bet over 25% of the kids do not get their license before they graduate HS … then again they live 3 miles from a major city directly on public transportation … it’s quicker, easier, and cheaper to NOT drive. On the other hand I went to a classic suburban HS where virtually everyone got a drivers license as son as they could since it was the only way to get anywhere. To the OP, I won’t worry about this with my kids unless they get out of college and then resist getting a license (and even then I have a nephew who moved to Manhattan upon graduation and did not get a license until about 25 … and it was perfectly rational)</p>
<p>What’s sad to me here (both of my kids so far also have “waited” to get their license - one just before senior year, one half way through senior year) is that so many kids ARE AFRAID to get their license because there are truly so many crazy people on the roads these days. Really, it’s ridiculous! Even my 13 year old has noticed how people seem to be doing whatever they want on the road. How sad, that something that was once scooped up right at 16 is now not so desirable.</p>
<p>I was fine with them waiting - didn’t mind taking them places if I needed to. But I did want them to be driving often and well by the time they were heading off to college - especially since at some point, they would both have cars to drive back and forth from their colleges to home.</p>
<p>We lived in the standard suburban town too where you had to drive to get anywhere, but both my parents needed their cars to get to work and couldn’t afford another one, so if I didn’t feel ready there was absolutely no motivation to rush. If I had to go anywhere and friends couldn’t take me, IF my parents were willing to drive me that is the only way I could have gone license or not because they didn’t feel comfortable sitting at home with no car. In my circle, delaying the license isn’t hugely uncommon because so many are not going to have cars to drive anyway, their parents end up driving them anyway. A lot of people still get the license and just don’t use it, but it’s not seen as a huge deal if you don’t get it until college, either. </p>
<p>I have known a few parents who purposefully delay getting the license too, because their kids have proven themselves not to be ready. My mom delayed my sister’s drivers ed a year for that reason. When she was of age to take her permit her behavior was crazy out of control and she couldn’t even be trusted with a bike, much less a car. The idea that all kids are ready for the responsibility at 16 is scarily naive. Even if you let them get the license and say they can’t drive, once they have it nothing is stopping them from getting behind the wheel of someone elses car hoping you won’t find out.</p>
<p>We live in an urban area and D was taught to be comfortable with public transportation from an early age. In middle school and HS, she was in fact much more independent than many of her suburban friends, who had to rely on their Mom to drive them to the Mall (And she learned to be MUCH more comfortable with and tolerant of the diversity of populations that one encounters on the city bus)</p>
<p>I was always amazed at the parents who had no fear letting their kids drive a two-ton vehicle, but who were afraid to let the ride the subway to the Smithsonian. ???</p>
<p>The joke among S1’s friends was that the kids learned so much physics from a much-beloved HS teacher that they were all too aware of the things that could go wrong behind the wheel.</p>
<p>My kids – early talkers, early readers, early adders, late walkers, late potty trainers, late drivers.</p>
<p>Both kids went to college at 17. Neither had licenses. Kid one: Girl. Got permit at 16. Failed road test at 17. Refused to try again. Graduated college with no license but lived in NYC and never felt the need of one. It did become an issue, but I couldn’t motivate her summers. I did not want her living at home in our semi suburban-semi rural neighborhood. She could walk to our teeny town but walking up a big hill to get back home was less attractive. She went to GA for a year to live with BF and acquired a car and a license and came back to NYC and never drives. Still, she can and does when she comes home for an occasional weekend.</p>
<p>Kid 2. Boy. Refused to even try before he left for college. Acquired license summer of sophomore year. Acquired car (my old car.) Is a real driver. Moves himself back and forth to school.</p>
<p>Moral: They’re not going to do anything until they’re ready. Kid 2 was almost 4 when he was toilet trained – one week short.</p>
<p>Both were taken for swimming lessons as tots – 3 and 1. The three year old learned easily. The one year old screamed in such terror I took him out of the water. The swimming instructor felt I was a real wimp. But after discovering that the really little ones couldn’t save themselves from drowning anyway but their cognitive skills won’t allow them, I saw no reason to terrorize him. He learned at 4. Swims well.</p>
<p>A friend’s son didn’t walk or talk at 18 mos. He seemed a real lump. Later on he excelled on Pomona’s swim team and is a grad student at MIT.</p>
<p>Growth is unpredictable and can not be legislated.</p>
(And she learned to be MUCH more comfortable with and tolerant of the diversity of populations that one encounters on the city bus)</p>