<p>Like me, my S has very thick hair. Based on the shape of his head and face he really needs to keep it short. When it is short he’s a really good looking guy. Instead he goes months without cutting it and it ends up looking like he’s wearing a gigantic, very ridiculous helmet!! Many people comment on it and my husband and I hate it. But if we say anything S just digs in heals in and refuses to cut it.</p>
<p>Worst part of all right now is that he’s trying to apply for jobs – many of which are in the restaurant industry. Should I just try and let it go? Have any of you run into this?</p>
<p>Yes, my son was the wild man of Borneo for years with wild hair and a wild beard. I swear he could have played the caveman in those ads for something (?) without a stitch of makeup. His job requires him to be clean shaven so he can wear a respirator if an emergency situation so once he started applying for jobs he cut the hair and beard of. </p>
<p>It was nice to see his lovely face again. Now he looks back on the old pictures and can’t believe how awful he looked. But it wasn’t till he felt he needed to do something about it that he acted. So I would say leave it up to our son.</p>
<p>We had the same here; the more we pushed for a haircut, the longer he let it grow. Once he was required in medical school to be clean shaven, he took care of it. Now he only goes without shaving during vacations!</p>
<p>I went through this with D2 in HS. It was bad. I have to be honest. There was a time I DID NOT WANT TO BE SEEN WITH HER IN PUBLIC. But I had to let go of my notions of what was appropriate. </p>
<p>One day I said to myself, who cares? I remember the day we walked arm and arm through the mall. Her hair not only had a funky color but a funky cut. Funky as in HORRIBLE. Her outfit was outlandish. I just decided that I had to accept this gifted child who needed to express herself in unusual ways. </p>
<p>She has grown up quite a bit now. Her hair is back to her own color for the first time in years. The cut is once again cute. The outfits are now more fashionable. I think the fact that I accepted her “style” helped her to realize she did not need to stand out quite that much.</p>
<p>I know this is a different situation. But I would just be quiet and wait. IT WILL HAPPEN.</p>
<p>D1 is dating a PhD student in Chemistry and he has shoulder length hair. When his look included facial hair, his mom came into town and took one look at him and exclaimed “OMG my son is Jesus.” It was priceless. She had not seen him since his hair was about at his collar. He is now clean shaven, but has kept the hair.</p>
<p>No haircut for 2 years in HS. Luckily he has great hair, so it was never stringy, and he donated his hair when it was finally cut.<br>
But I decided if hair was the worst thing I had to deal with I’d consider myself lucky. He’ll cut it when it prevents him from getting something he wants (in son’s case it was a girl).</p>
When my son had his bushy hair and beard he had a part time job in Walmart. An old coot, er customer, got very aggressive with him asking if he was a Muslim and berating him for having a beard. It was surreal. My son was very polite in the way he handled it (probably more than I would have been). On the other hand his then girlfriend’s grandmother thought he looked like Jesus.</p>
<p>Lots of threads on the parent cafe are ridiculous. Some are helpful. Some are sad. Some are funny. That is what the parent cafe was set up for. If you don’t like it, don’t read it.</p>
<p>My nephew went for the dreadlocks look when he was in high school. It was not an attractive look (there should be some law about goofy looking white boys with dreadlocks…) For a while it was purple… My sister-in-law and brother-in-law took the “it’s just hair” approach. I’m sure I wouldn’t have been quite as laid back about it. He shaved it all off hours before he graduated from high school, and I don’t believe he’s cut it since…4 years later. At least it’s pretty and blonde now… ;)</p>
<p>A friend just told me that his son hasn’t cut his hair or shaved since leaving for college (he is a freshman). He says he looks like a cross between Jerimiah Johnson and Charles Manson. I think it is funny, but I would imagine if it were my son it would bother me.</p>
<p>My brother had long hair pulled back in a ponytail for years. My mom hated it, but he refused to cut it (he was in his 30’s and single). </p>
<p>Then one day he cut it all off - really short. Why?
My D, his favorite niece, who was 12 at the time, told him she thought he would look younger if he cut it.
A nurse at the hospital where my mother was an inpatient told him he looked like Steven Segall. And brother thought Steven Segall looked OLD.
Mom was diagnosed with Cancer. Brother decided to make her happy.</p>
<p>A couple months after cutting it off, he met the woman who eventually became his wife. After they were married she came across pictures of him with his long hair and informed him that if she had met him with that ponytail, she wouldn’t have given him the time of day.</p>
<p>Moral of the story for the OP: Get a GIRL to tell him he has helmet head. Preferably a cute girl. It will have a lot more impact than coming from Mom.</p>
<p>(Edit - I am not a fan of fighting over hair. It’s not permanent, like a tattoo. But the OP is concerned that her S’s hair may keep him from getting a job, so that’s a different story.)</p>
<p>My son’s girlfriend liked his wild hair and beard. She didn’t like it when he cut the hair and shaved the beard. I think it’s because all the girls thought he was hot (they kept saying so - even the receptionist at our insurance company commented on it to my husband). Also he was a couple of years younger and the beard/hair made him look older.</p>
<p>I was good, I bit my tongue the whole time and didn’t say a word.</p>
<p>I guess I must be the only one who thinks the hair both on S1 and S2 is too short! I do admit I prefer clean-cut looking young men, so I am happy it is too short rather than too long. But…a little longer would be nice.</p>
<p>I don’t really have a problem with long hair at all. My son’s problem is that he has really thick hair. Looks really nice when not too long but as it gets longer, instead of growing downward it grows outward and outward and outward…</p>