A week and a half ago I had a clean judicial record. Now I have two infractions. I’m terrified.
I’m a sophomore in undergrad. Last semester I had a boyfriend. We broke up like as soon as we got back to school this semester and I was so excited to see him. I can’t even explain what happened, he just all of a sudden wasn’t interested, or thought I wasn’t, I really don’t know.
Then two weeks my roommate and I got into a huge argument and she was chasing me around the room shouting in my face and insulting me and I smacked her wrist and threw my scarf at her. She reported me to the RA and I had to have a hearing about physical assault/violence. I work in daycares. I work with the elderly. I am not a violent person. I legit got evicted from my room because of this. It felt like absolute shit. Not to mention me and my roommate were really really good friends and had been on vacation together. Oh she also reported this three days later, on my birthday.
Then that Friday, my friends wanted to go to this latina festival thing and brought a ton of alcohol to a pregame and were blasting music and the RAs came in and we hid most of it but they confiscated two bottles and some red cups. They said we were only written down for a noise complaint but I kinda doubt that.
My parents don’t know about any of this. I just applied to study abroad. I have so many friends and have lost weight and am making good money (3 jobs) and my social life is better than it has ever been in my life and I was soo happy like a month ago. I don’t know what to do. This week I should find out the sanction for the fight thing (I think that won’t be harsh because I explained what happened and had people vouch for me that my roommate is pretty much a nut job and throws tantrums all the time), and I should find out if I’m being put down for alcohol violation or noise complaint.
I’m so scared. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I feel sick constantly. Please god someone help me. I have three jobs and already had to drop a course (I was overloading) because this was all just too stressful.
You need to reduce your own stress level. Quit a job and cut back a bit on the partying. Needing to drop a class is a sign that your priorities are mixed up. Maybe the stress you are under is affecting your relationships and reactions, too – both your BF and roommate have backed away. Go to the student health center and see a mental health counselor, too. They might help you sort through your priorities.
Talk to your parents. It will be hard, I know. If you have a hard time bringing up the topic, then send them a text and say “I need to talk to you about something that happened at school. Please call.”
Tell them what happened. The last thing you want to happen is you to get worse punishment/whatever because you didn’t most effectively defend yourself/have representation. Let your parents help shoulder the burden.
Also think about the jobs…maybe 3 is too many and you should concentrate at school.
Finally, go to the Counseling Center and talk about all this with them. It will help you get it all out.
Your “Judicial Record” is not a criminal record, it only matters to the school at the time you are attending. Future employers/grad schools are not going to see it or care.
Consider hiring an attorney if necessary, but honestly it’s just a small speed bump that means nothing in the long run.
I agree with the posters above, talk to a school counselor about stress, and definitely talk to your parents ASAP and hopefully they can be helpful. 3 jobs does sound like too much, because it cuts into your sleep/study/class time, and really 1 job is probably the max a full time student should have. There’s no way for us to know the complete picture here but clearly you could probably use a few adjustments.
Please relax. You are a little too freaked out over some incidents that are pretty minor in the grand scheme of things.
Dropping classes in favor of partying and work is a very bad idea. Please visit a counselor who can help you prirotize and put things in perspective.