What’s the difference between Preference Dinner and Bid Day and what to expect? Thank you.
You need to specify what campus you are talking about.
Preference is where you visit your final two or three sororities. I’m guessing that “preference dinner” means that they’ll serve you dinner. Bid Day is where you actually get your invitation (bid) to join a sorority. You will only get one bid.
As southlander said,the Preference is the final party, usually pretty dressy. After that Bid day is the celebration of the girl picking the house and the house picking the girl. Bid day is usually informal with the new pledges changing into tshirts (or stacking it on top of what she’s wearing).
Do all girls get a bid, even if it’s not from her first choice?
If you attend all the preference parties and list all your choices, it would be very rare for you not to receive a bid. Most folks recommend against suiciding or choosing only 1 sorority at preference as you could be left out if not on that sorority’s A list.
The majority of large schools have adopted a program that almost guarantees that if the girl has accepted the maximum number of parties from the different houses, and still has 3 (or the max) number of invitations to Preference, she will get a bid. I’m sure there are some schools where this doesn’t work out, but they really are trying to maximize the number of girls who get bids. Sometimes, there are just so many girls that there aren’t enough houses to accommodate them all, and then they will try to add another house. Adding houses takes time, sometimes 3+ years.
When I was a freshman, many years go, there was a girl in my dorm who didn’t get a bid, and she dropped out of school. So bizarre. It sounds like things are changing for the better.
I’m glad to hear that, twoinanddone. That must have been so awful for that young woman, MaineLonghorn. I never thought about joining a sorority, but it would be nice if there was a place for all the girls who are interested in joining one.
@mainelonghorn, same here. My college roommate (20+ years ago now) also ended up dropping out because she didn’t get a bid. I thought it was crazy at the time and still do now. I was a GDI…
On the other hand, my niece rushed at UVA and didn’t get a bid. Yes, she was disappointed. But it took her only a semester or two to put it completely behind her. She developed a fantastic group of friends (many of whom were Jeff scholars), played in the pit orchestra, organized trips abroad for a philanthropic group during breaks, tutored gradeschool kids, and graduated with high honors. By the time she was done with Charlottesville, I’m pretty sure she would not have changed a thing about her four years there.
Hi All - Thanks so much for your feedback - I really appreciate it! I neglected to post that this was for a fraternity for my son, but guessing it’s the same deal. Good news is that he did get into the fraternity which fits his needs (not the rager, partiers, but a moderation of social/academic) and he is happy with it. Preference dinner was jacket/tie apparel, bid day was casual - anything one would wear to a party.
One question though - how can one possibly visit more than one house on Preference Day (as suggested above)? They are dinners and all during the same time. I guess that’s when the student has to chose one.
In the sorority system I was in, you were slated to visit up to three houses on preference day; I can’t recall if it was for 1 hour apiece or 2 hours apiece, but you get the concept. But dinner wasn’t served. Then that night you put your picks in order and the houses did the same.
I don’t mean this snarkily, but the details on how the fraternities do it - that’s the kind of detail that your son would need to figure out (or presumably already has, if he got in) and much as it’s tempting for us parents to want to work through all the details, they really do need to figure it out.
Interesting, Pizzagirl. Why are we all on the Parents forum if we all think our children should figure it out on their own? Digressing into parenting styles is not necessary or proper.
Otherwise, helpful answers here. Spring Rush at my son’s college only had two days of meet/greet, then invitation only events for three days.
My perception is that the fraternities have a much more relaxed and informal style for this process than the sororities do.