DS thrived at a Quaker school. We live in a very homogeneous community, so it’s been fun to watch his closest group of friends evolve into an assembly of kids who are like none he knew when he started. I wish that I had his skills in managing confrontational/difficult discussions! He’s been nurtured but most definitely not coddled. I feel like he’s had more opportunities to be reflective than I did at that age. Mostly, though, he seems really comfortable in his own skin now, and I couldn’t say that about the kid who matriculated there.
I totally agree with everyone else here. It’s a good idea to look at the websites and get a sense of the places from the materials that are available there, but ultimately, you need to visit and see if the vibe is right for you.