State Park = gay trolling place?

emeraldkity4 · August 2, 2010, 1:24pm

If you knew this park was a place where people (men) meet to have sex, would you take your little kids there?

If I knew " how" because I read about it on the internet, or because every single time I went there, I saw sexual activity on the trail?

Those things are not something I look for or worry about.
What I would think about is safety, is it a well made trail, am I likely to have to take a detour where I would get lost, go off a cliff? Is it too steep/long for the kids?
Is my car going to get broken into when it is parked? Am I going to be assaulted/robbed on the trail?
Worrying about seeing somebody’s butt, accidentally, isn’t a concern as long as it isn’t a place that attracts exhibitionists for some weird reason.

Bay · August 2, 2010, 1:30pm

I do because when I was walking down the street at age 10, a man pulled over, rolled down his window and orgasmed in front of me. It was traumatic for me. If I knew that we might encounter something similar at a park known for such activity, I would keep my kids far, far away.

zoosermom · August 2, 2010, 1:32pm

If I knew they met to make arrangements to have sex elsewhere, I’d go. If they were actually having sex in the park where I could encounter them, probably not. I wouldn’t want to encounter anyone having sex in public.

musicamusica · August 2, 2010, 1:33pm

The OP asked whether this activity “should be reported”. “Reported” to who? To do what?

Hunt · August 2, 2010, 1:34pm

If a park becomes dominated, or even significantly impacted, by illegal activity, you may not want to go there. This could be sex, drugs, or even nudity.

But there may be legal activity that might also make you want to avoid certain parks–smoking, or a lot of dogs, or it may become a favorite gathering place for creepy biker gangs, or teenagers.

What the OP is talking about is something that is uncomfortably on the border between the two. If you say you want to avoid a park frequented by gay men, you sound intolerant, while if you say you want to avoid a park frequented by gay men who have sex in the bushes there, it’s a different story.

frazzled1 · August 2, 2010, 1:35pm

Surely you can see that the way you phrased your original post was hardly likely to result in an outpouring of support? Had you asked any of us if we wanted to stumble over people (of any orientation) having sex in public, you’d almost certainly have had a unanimous “no.” You asked if we thought “solo males” should be reported for … being in a state park. One that you learned on the internet (always an unimpeachable source of information :rolleyes:) has been used as a “gay ■■■■■■■■ place.”

If you had phrased your OP more judiciously, perhaps our “self-righteousness” wouldn’t have offended you so.

TatinG · August 2, 2010, 1:37pm

The main reason I go hiking is to relax. To get away from anything stressful.

So I would stay away from a park that had a reputation for gay sex in the bushes, or prostitution, drug exchanges, etc. Seeing that would add that element of stress, embarrassment, or with the drugs and prostitutes even danger, that I just don’t want on a park visit.

And to the guy who goes to Sequoia National Park, there are certain areas there that are dangerous because of marijuana farming operations run by drug cartels.

There are no go areas in parks along the Mexican-California border because of the dangers from human and drug smuggling.

Just seeing men alone on the trail wouldn’t bother me. As long as they were taking their hook-ups elsewhere for the sex.

DougBetsy · August 2, 2010, 1:43pm

Be made aware?? By whom? Posted signs? Gossip? Rumors? And who saw anybody having sex in your park? You didn’t. You saw men hiking alone. And they saw you. What were you up to?

If I KNEW gay men were having sex in a park in broad daylight in places that were viewable from the playground or picnic table or trail then no, I wouldn’t take my kids. But if I had heard unsubstantiated rumors from some homophobes, I still might go.

07DAD · August 2, 2010, 1:47pm

State Park sex made it on the following list of 102 places to have sex on the Romance Struck website. So, I agree with OP that this is not an issue only to the homophobic.

To be extra careful, everyone needs to (1) avoid these places and/or (2) request that the authorities provide additional patrols.

1.On a porch swing.
2.Inside an unknown rocky cave or limestone cave.
3.In the weight room at your gym.
4.In your not-yet-finished new build house.
5.On the hood of your car on a deserted gravel road.
6.On a pool table.
7.On top of the washer… while it’s running.
8.On a soft rug in front of a fireplace.
9.On a secluded island beach.
10.In the backyard under the stars.
11.In the woods after it rains.
12.On a motorcycle.
13.In a public restroom.
14.In an airplane restroom – join the mile high club!
15.On a train in the middle of the night.
16.In bed with silk or satin sheets.
17.In bed with rose petals all over.
18.On the beach at night.
19.In your lover’s childhood room while their parents are home.
20.Outside in the rain.
21.In a hot tub.
22.On the deck of a yacht during a full moon.
23.Under a rainbow.
24.On a trampoline.
25.On top of a hill.
26.In the middle of nowhere.
27.In the car during heavy traffic.
28.In the car on the side of a deserted road.
29.In a hotel.
30.In a state park.
31.On a waterbed.
32.On the loft in a barn full of hay.
33.In a field full of wildflowers.
34.On a rooftop.
35.In an open field at night.
36.By a waterfall with the water misting all around you.
37.Under a waterfall.
38.In your partner’s bed.
39.In the garage.
40.On a jungle gym at night.
41.Outside during sunset.
42.In the car going through an automated car wash.
43.On your patio, balcony, or deck on a starry night.
44.In the mountains.
45.On an abandoned air field.
46.Under the full moon in wet grass.
47.On a porch swing.
48.In the living room during the day with the windows wide open.
49.On a blanket beside a lake.
50.In an elevator.
51.On the bathroom floor.
52.In your partner’s parents room.
53.In a sauna.
54.In a very big bed.
55.On the top bunk of a bunk bed.
56.In a tent.
57.At your office.
58.On your office desk.
59.On a boat deck with the waves gently rocking you.
60.In a tree house.
61.In a department store restroom.
62.In the restroom at a restaurant.
63.In a hot air balloon.
64.In a room filled with lit candles.
65.In a bathtub.
66.In the shower.
67.In a canoe on a river.
68.On a baseball diamond at night.
69.In a swimming pool.
70.At the bottom of the grand canyon.
71.In a beach house with a light breeze gusting outside.
72.Off a beaten trail in the woods.
73.In every room of your house.
74.On a chair.
75.On an air mattress.
76.On your kitchen table.
77.In a screened in porch in the middle of a thunderstorm.
78.On a hotel balcony, covered with a fuzzy blanket.
79.In a sleeping bag under the stars.
80.On a paddle boat on a lake.
81.In the bed of a truck on a hot summer night.
82.In the ocean… ride the waves.
83.In a room filled with balloons.
84.In front of a video camera.
85.In an abandoned barn on the hay wearing nothing but cowboy boots and a cowboy hat.
86.On an old sheet with chocolate body frosting.
87.On a bed surrounded by pillows.
88.At a bed and breakfast.
89.On an amusement park ride… tunnel of love, in the dark?
90.In the back of a limo.
91.Next to a campfire.
92.On a golf course.
93.In the car at a drive-in movie.
94.On really plush carpet.
95.In your house during a thunderstorm, with a window open and rain misting in.
96.On a picnic table.
97.In a hammock.
98.On horseback.
99.While scuba-diving.
100.On a ferris wheel when you’re stuck at the top.
101.At a rest area.
102.In a corn field.

Hanna · August 2, 2010, 1:52pm

“The authorities don’t round up stray guys. At least not yet.”

I would say, not anymore.

07DAD · August 2, 2010, 2:00pm

I think the dog is safe.

Bay · August 2, 2010, 2:03pm

Our family regularly hikes in a beautiful local state park. I occasionally notice men walking the trails alone who give me creeps, so I never hike alone there or allow my kids to. These men are not dressed for hiking on dirt trails - they are wearing sandals or street shoes and non-hiking attire, and seem not to be moving in hiking mode. I know their attire is not necessarily indicative of anything, but nature gave us our intuition for a reason, and my antennae go up when I see them. It actually never occurred to me that they might be gay, I was more fearful for my Ds hiking alone there. Now I won’t let my S go alone, either!

07DAD · August 2, 2010, 2:23pm

What if we just closed all state parks to everybody except married, monogamous, heterosexual couples when both spouses are present? That way perhaps we could be less frightened while hiking.

Or, pass a law that requires all people to tattoo their sexual persuasion on their forehead to assist us in knowing why and for whom to be scared if a person is seen unaccompanied in a state park.

Aside. Have you ever noticed that lots of women hikers have short hair and not a lot, if any, makeup on? Hum.

Bay · August 2, 2010, 2:29pm

It must be fun to make light of the situation when you are a man, 07DAD. Recently here in CA, a teenage girl was assaulted and murdered by a lone man while running on park trails.

07DAD · August 2, 2010, 2:30pm

And what do you think could have made a difference?

morrismm · August 2, 2010, 2:32pm

It was actually my H who first mentioned that he thought something was up (no pun intended.) I didn’t even think anything when we passed the first guy on the path. He was wearing purple satin drawstring pants, no top, had pierced nipples and streaked blond hair. I just thought–“Not something I’d wear to go hiking.”

My H believes he did see sexual activity. I did not.

Obviously you cannot believe everything you read on the internet, (I don’t believe half of what I read here), but one of the sites described the place and pretty much the behavior we witnessed,i.e. which paths to take, etc. This is not a groomed downtown park. It’s a few hundred acres of mostly woods, a few streams, some crude paths in the middle of no where.

Oh and 07DAD–do you give your kids front and center seats when you are doing your thing at each of those 102 places? You sound like a busy man.

So the bottom line is I wrote on here what I saw–which was men. Not all women or all teens. Then I wrote what I found written about the park. With what I saw and read, if my kids were still young, I wouldn’t take them there. I don’t know if I’ll go back. I wouldn’t drop dead if I saw people having sex. But I don’t particularly want to see it. But I don’t view pornography either.

It was my H who said to me, “Lets get out of here.” I do not think he wants to go back. He doesn’t care if someone is gay either. I just don’t think he is into pierced nipples.

I do know people with children who would definitely want to be warned about the place.

Bay · August 2, 2010, 2:42pm

Since the assailant was unarmed, I think being accompanied by a man would have made all the difference.

07DAD · August 2, 2010, 2:53pm

Bay;

Running is pairs with a male has nothing to do some how with warning people that gay or heterosexual ■■■■■■■■ occurs or necessarily with having extra patrols. While not every time, often these attacks are random and rape is a crime of violence (as is murder), not sex.

Pizzagirl · August 2, 2010, 3:08pm

Well, at the very least, you can’t have two brothers, or two male friends, without a female escort. Or “beard.”

cptofthehouse · August 2, 2010, 3:10pm

A few years ago, I took a walk on a trail near our then home with our dog. In the middle of the “park”, I encountered a bunch of kids/young men with pitbulls. They looked like a scruffy lot using bad language and looking threatening (in my opinion). They stopped talking and watched me intently as I went by, very nervously.

Since then, I am careful about walking on trails and anywhere that I don’t research first. If you don’t know, yes, it can be unsafe. And a gay meeting place is not on my list of places to avoid. I’m talking gang meeting places, drug deals spots, etc. where you are truly putting your life at risk going by at the wrong time. This is not limited to parks. You don’t walk in strange neighborhoods alone, either without having some idea where you are going. Not if you have any safety sense.

State Park = gay trolling place?

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