<p>I am getting recruited for XC at a few DIII schools and McGill up in canada. I live in Philadelphia and have been invited for a visit over thanksgiving weekend. I was planning on going up to Montreal and spending one night with the guys on the team and one night with a friend of mine who attends McGill. The coach understands that it is an 8 hour drive for me so he knows that I would probably be spending the 2 nights in montreal. Would it reflect poorly in terms of blending in with team dynamics if I told him I wanted to stay with the team for one night instead of the two? He has said in his email already that I could stay both nights. I’m fine either way, but I wanted to spend a night with a good friend of mine as well.</p>
<p>I don’t think it will be a problem. It’s actually a bit of a burden on the guys to host, so they’d probably be grateful to have you hang with a friend one night. You can still do any team stuff during the day.</p>
<p>PA,
You should be able to stay with a friend, but remember that your behavior at all times should be accountable to your coach/team. It’s one thing to visit a friend at college for the weekend and behave…well, you can fill in the blank. But in your circumstance, I wouldn’t advise letting you guard down.</p>
<p>I think it would look better recruiting-wise to stay both nights with the team. Looks a bit odd if you’re still on a visit but not staying with the team and hanging with them for the nights out. If you’re really invested in this school and think it is your top choice, I would stay both nights with the guys and see your friend during the day or stop by their dorm for only a little while at night.</p>
<p>Absolutely fine to split the time between team and friend. As classicalmama said, and as my own son sees now that he’s the one hosting recruits, the coach will probably be a little relieved that he (and his players) only have to be responsible for you for one day/night.</p>
<p>I would stay with the team. The coach is looking for feed back about you directly from team mates that he or she already knows and trusts. The overnight is for you to get a feel for the school from the athlete’s perspective. After the overnight stay, go hang out with your friend.</p>
<p>A typical unofficial visit–which is what I’m assuming this is–is one night, not two. The OP is staying two nights because of distance, not because that’s what’s typical for the team. One night with the team is thus fine–ask the coach which would be more convenient.</p>