I totally agree w/you on this topic. My DH & I were married for several years before we had kids, so I lived through LOTS of questions about “When are you going to have children?” My mom one time said to me flat out that she thought it was SELFISH for people to NOT have children.
I told her that a person who chose NOT to have children probably had a good reason for making that decision. And that decision is FAR better than the SELFISH people who know that they don’t want children, but they have kids anyway.
You don’t owe those people ANY explanation. You do not need to JADE.
JADE = Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain.
If you feel that you MUST give some sort of answer, here are a couple of responses to consider:
- "I have a good reason."
- "Having children is a really big responsibility. I've thought a lot about it and I take a responsibility that I take very seriously. I've decided that it's not something I am ready for."
- "Did you really just ask me about my sex life? How's yours? How come YOU aren't having more kids?"
- "Don't ask a question like that unless you are prepared to hear the answer." :-)