So, just apologizing upfront. This a a bit long, but thank you in advance to anyone who can make it through and can offer advice.
So two years ago, as a senior in high school I had my heart set on American University in Washington DC. I fell in love with the international studies program, befriended a professor and felt like Washington DC was where I was meant to be. When I got my acceptance letter, I was overjoyed, but my hopes were soon crushed when I read the financial aide package. They gave me nothing. I was later able to obtain a descent amount on a merit appeal, but it did little to lower the $55,000 approximate cost that I would be facing for freshman year. Despite the fact that I knew I couldn’t afford it, I accepted the offer of admission at the very last minute, under the false hope that other outside scholarships would come through. I never received a single one. This was a problem, as my parents refused to cosign on any loans for my college application, and their income was far to high for me to qualify for financial aide.
Therefore, come July, I realized scholarshipping was hopeless and called other colleges I had applied to. My last choice safetey school - University of Northern Colorado, agreed to take me at the last minute, and even offered me the same academic scholarships that they had when I applied. The scholarships plus instate tuition made it an easy choice, so I headed up there in the fall. It went terribly. The location drove me insane (so remote and cut off), and in terms of social life, I definitely was not the type of student that had any sort of fit there. I made a huge effort to get involved with clubs, and meet people, but I only made a couple friends, and none of the clubs were a fit for me. The town was incredibly limited (not even sure if you could call the surounding area a town, so life outside campus to make up for it wasn’t really an option). My depression got significantly worse, and treatment did little to help. However, academically I was doing great - I made the Dean’s List and was even nominated to several honor societies. I didn’t realize this, but the small class sizes led to more essay and discussion based grades, did wonders for my GPA (I am terrible with memorization and multiple choice tests). I lost all interest in classes, but was able to keep a good GPA.
Despite the fact that I was miserable, I stuck it out for 2 semesters at UNC. I went home for summer, and when fall began to approach, I couldn’t go back. So, looking at my financial resources, I decided to transfer to Metropolitan State University of Denver - a school in my hometown that has a low tier reputation. I never would have considered the school in high school, but given the finical conundrum I am in, it would work, and in the sense of battling depression it did. I feel so much better. But everything else is literally a nightmare - I disliked my classes at UNC, but at Metro, I seriously hate every single class. I am studying more than I ever did at UNC but struggling like crazy - the professors won’t help (I’ve been to office hours so many times and can barely get any questions answered), and multiple choice assessments are wrecking havoc on my grades. I am failing one class right now and have a high D in another.
I don’t know what to do. I don’t really want to transfer back to UNC, but a good GPA is important, and I might fail at Metro. So what I want to know is which is worse:
A) waiting until I am old enough to not have to factor my parents income in for financial aid and then go back to school? In the mean time, just work jobs like serving, hosting, etc. Then apply to a school that has smaller classes, but isn’t in Greeley where UNC is
B) never go back to school (i am scared of this option, but I just hate college so much)
C) stick it out at Metro, and graduate with the bare minimum GPA. My question with this is will terrible grades from a low tier institution end up with the same results as not going to school at all?