Student on Student Lacrosse Murder at UVa

<p>The lacrosse forums are burning up right now with concern that this is a lacrosse story. The East Coast lacrosse world is very tight knit. The top athletes come from the private schools and public schools with very well organized club teams. I have a very good friend whose daughter was a recruited lacrosse player and the mom can tell you where every girl in the state went for college lacrosse. They live and breathe it like no other sport in this area. </p>

<p>I had read that Huguely hadn’t played much this season so I looked at the UVA lacrosse webpage but his name has already been taken off the roster - for all the seasons. There are 5 other men on that team who graduated from private schools within a few miles of Yeardley’s school. </p>

<p>Yeardley is listed on the Women’s roster. There are 5 other women on that team who went to private schools within a few miles of hers. 12 of the 24 players are from her home state of Maryland. </p>

<p>There was talk that UVA might withdraw from the tournament but there was never any real chance that they would.</p>

<p>I’m skinny like a stick but I don’t dread physical contact.</p>

<p>Luckily the REAL football (the one you actually play with your foot) is contact-prone…I love to tackle and sabotage as a 155lb stick. I think the girls almost have an equal playing field on this one.</p>

<p>Both of these young people were originally from Maryland. The Sun article fills in some details that have been speculated on by other posters. It is indeed a tragedy for both families.</p>

<p>[Va</a>. lacrosse player told police he shook ex-girlfriend and her head hit wall - Baltimore Sun](<a href=“Va. lacrosse player told police he shook ex-girlfriend and her head hit wall”>Va. lacrosse player told police he shook ex-girlfriend and her head hit wall)</p>

<p>Here’s an article posted in the UVA forum about the culture at Landon:</p>

<p>[“Our</a> Sons Have Something To Say” - News & Features (washingtonian.com)](<a href=“From the Archives: “Our Sons Have Something To Say” - Washingtonian”>From the Archives: “Our Sons Have Something To Say” - Washingtonian)</p>

<p>Truly hard to read that article and think it was a tragic accident.</p>

<p>She wouldn’t need her computer to access her emails. We don’t know how long he stayed there after he beat her up. He may have sat for a minute and then thought to take her computer. I think if she had threatened him she would have made sure the apt was locked.</p>

<p>What does a diffferent group of children having cheated on SATs have to do with the tragic death of a student at UVA, and the arrest of another UVA student? </p>

<p>If one attends a public high school, cheats on the SAT or is suspected of cheating on it, isn’t the score just normally cancelled and then life goes on without trials, suspensions, expulsions, etc.? If this group of students referred to in the article had attended a public high school, wouldn’t their scores have just been cancelled, and the public and perhaps the high school would not even be aware about the suspected cheating? Just wondering.</p>

<p>MD mom’s link is very disturbing. The prior incident in which he was so enraged he had to be tasered, the description of her face, the pool of blood, the fact his statement was that he shook her and in doing so her face “repeatedly” hit the wall. And the final kicking a hole in the wall in her bedroom. This was NO accident. He was out of control,</p>

<p>I agree sunnyforida. I don’t see what CTTC’s link about cheating on SATs has to do with this though.</p>

<p>Me either, just that it is the same school. Maybe a culture of entitlement?</p>

<p>I posted the link in response to Post #132 by 3bysmom. I thought the article had interesting information about the atmosphere at that school. </p>

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<p>Northeastmom–Though not exactly related, the prep school story link points out a trend for lack of ethics/morality. Our kids both went to public school through middle school (one even finished ninth grade) and then went to private school. In our opinion, one of the biggest problems (especially with our first child’s school) was that the privileged kids did not have to follow the rules. And if one of the kids was a great athlete, it was like a free ticket to misbehave. Our society has different rules for the rich and the athletically talented.</p>

<p>cross post with above</p>

<p>Ahh, okay. I just don’t think that this is the only high school that has seen their students and graduates do some awful things. What I did find interesting is that even though students cheated on their SATs they were able to gain admission to top schools anyway. I found that to be very surprising.</p>

<p>MDmom, I just cross posted with you. I see your point. Our society does have different rules. I don’t see too many students from our public high school (very competitive for a public) getting into Duke, Georgetown, etc. all in the same year. This school seems to send many of their graduates to such schools (even if they have been caught cheating). I guess this school is a feeder school to highly ranked private colleges, but I don’t know.</p>

<p>^^Different rules for the rich and athletically talented.</p>

<p>One of the executives I work with knows the players well on the UVa team, and knows all of the top players in the DC Baltimore area. This is not surprising - her sons are among the best players in the area - with two playing in college already. She knows the accused and his family reasonably well. </p>

<p>Her concern is with the “junkyard dog” mentality that she believes, if left uncontrolled, can and does cause significant problems in the lacrosse culture. Her sons are excellent students, and she has fought it in their development. </p>

<p>In light of this tragedy, I think it is fair to inquiry whether that mentality, if encouraged (and in some quarters it is), leads to a dissolution of boundaries which are frankly so important to young people. </p>

<p>Having said this, I do want to make clear that this young man’s actions are his own, and his teammates and coaches are not in the end responsible. But in my own Div. 1 athletic experience, I can assure you if I attempted to assault a police officer while drunk and got tasered for it to boot, it would have been a heckuva a long road back to the fields of competition - and my teammates would have expected far more from me. This is of course one reason and I others stayed within boundaries - the positive peer pressure worked.</p>

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<p>I have to agree with this and the statement that privileged kids had a different set of rules. Money does talk, and a parent will often intervene with a check. Talent also talks. Especially on the field.</p>

<p>This is not across the board, but it hold true in my area. And for reasons like this my kids went to public schools starting about 2nd grade (Montessori before that). We could have gone the private route. And many in my professional circle wondered why we did not. But I had my reasons. And my kids turned out just fine.</p>

<p>sunnyflorida - The hole was in the door he kicked down to get into her bedroom. The door to the apartment was unlocked. </p>

<p>It sounds to me as though he put her into the bed - perhaps hoping or pretending (in perhaps an alcohol saturated brain) that she was still alive.</p>

<p>The Sun article mentions a lengthy divorce. Court records indicate that they fought it out for 7 years.</p>

<p>The Kennedy boys and relatives are prime examples of a sense being able to do as they please without consequences. And W Bush too.</p>

<p>NEmom - lots of kids attend independent schools, but it appears that this particular independent school seems to have a disproportionate number of incidents relating to questionable morals/ethics/behaviors. I am not aware of any other independent school in the area that has had this many scandals. Of course, every school has skeletons, but not this type nor this many. The SAT incident reinforces the point that MDmom made:</p>

<p>“one of the biggest problems (especially with our first child’s school) was that the privileged kids did not have to follow the rules. And if one of the kids was a great athlete, it was like a free ticket to misbehave. Our society has different rules for the rich and the athletically talented.”</p>

<p>What I am saying though, is that a typical public hs, kids go into a testing center and take the SATs. If there was suspected cheating discovered in that room the CB would probably cancel the scores. That would be the end of it. You would not read about XYZ Public High School in Chicago, Boston, or Jacksonville having expelled, suspended, etc. 10 students for cheating on the SATs. Nobody would know about the incident other than the students involved. Am I incorrect about that? I suspect this made it into the papers because of hearings, and the prominence and wealth of the school and probably the families.</p>