Hello. I have submitted my applications to lots of boarding schools like:
I was on the phone with my cousin who goes to boarding school and I asked" Do ppl do the deed there" and she replied yes. I am low-key scared. So, I was wondering if the following schools that I applied to do the same things they do at other lowkey
boarding schools. Also, is there a hookup culture and drinking problems there?
At every high school, public or private, boarding or day, some portion of the population will be sexually active, vaping, and drinking. The majority will not.
If you are worried about this, start learning about how to set boundaries, resist peer pressure, and advocate for yourself/say no. One of the easiest ways to minimize these pressures is to get involved in the things you want to be doing. If your time is filled with the activities you choose, this is less of a problem than if you are faced with time to kill.
Itâs good that you are thinking about how you want to conduct yourself at BS. Itâs easier to make good choices when youâre intentional about it.
In addition the the excellent advice offered by @gardenstategal , you may want to review this survey from Andover. The results are likely not unique to that school.
If you take a look at that survey, youâll see that almost 59% of the student body has never done it. If you donât want to do it, you donât have to. And, by the way, that percentage is probably the same or lower at nearly every high school (there might be less at boarding school, because students are swamped with work [but also, there is more freedom from parents, so 
.]).
I donât feel like there is more freedom from parents. I feel like kids are watched more and are supposed to be in certain places most of the day. I feel like it would be harder at BS.
Funny story. Every time we walk through the woods to get to the athletic fields at S23 boarding school, Iâd ask DH how many people he thinks have gotten down and dirty there. When S23 wanted to set up trail cams for a research project he had to meet with admin. The deal was that as soon as a human came into frame, he had to erase everything. They brought up an âexampleâ of staff members walking dogs. We now call it 'walking the dog".
All kind of kids will be there in every school. It depend on you choosing the right company and setting the boundaries to not getting influenced by those things. The kids who get caught has to pay the bigger price. You will be very busy with your academics and other activities that no time for all the bad things and choosing to stay away from those is the key to show strong character.
The general feeling I got was that certain kids were going to break the rules. They knew it, the admin knew it and the other students knew it. Yes, they were often the âinâ crowd. But, the larger percentage of kids were there to work hard, have a great experience, and try to avoid breaking the rules. In the end, the rule followers walked away with their heads held high. As a family that sacrificed to send our kid to BS, DS told me âI have too much to lose to do anything stupidâ. He had a great time and made good friends (he has a girlfriend of 3+ years that we absolutely love), but also avoided the group that was making bad choices. While his social group was smaller than it would have been if he hadnât made that choice, the opportunities that came his way were better as admin trusted him and knew he would make good decisions. And, as a parent, Iâm really proud of him and am so happy that his friends are people that are honest, hardworking and genuine.
If you want to avoid hook-ups, drinking, etc. you will find your crowd. And it will be a good one. Just stay away from social media FOMO (which hits hard no matter what crowd youâre in) and develop true, meaningful friendships with quality people.
I graduated from one of the schools on your list last spring. Drinking and hook-up culture exists everywhere; boarding schools arenât unique in that sense. I personally never had any problems with either, or felt any peer pressure to participate, even though some of my friends were actively involved in those âscenes.â
We also ran a survey similar to the one skieurope linked when I was a junior, and the results were pretty much the same.
Thank you! By the way, what school did you graduate from?
Lawrenceville.
Oh yay! Thatâs my number 2 on my list!! Please, tell me your experience as a Lawrentian, and if you remember, your stats from middle school.
Thereâs no point in being scared; just avoid that crowd and stick with the people you trust. PLUS, the âdeedâ isnât done just in BS alone; itâs everywhere, from private schools to LPS.
I enjoyed it a lot! The 4 years I was there were very tumultuous, but I still absolutely loved being there and look upon my time fondly. One thing I will say is that I believe that you have to be really driven to thrive at Lawrenceville; itâs an incredibly intense lifestyle that itâs easy to fall behind in. I personally really enjoyed it, but it doesnât work for everyone. If you have any specific questions, feel free to DM me (although I am in school so I might take a while).
4.0 GPA, 99th percentile SSAT, attended a âfeederâ private K-8. Went to states for the Geography Bee one year. I canât really remember much else, but it probably wasnât relevant either way. Also, standards are so much higher nowadays 
May or may not be following this thread to find out what schools i want to go to 
/s (maybe)
depends on boarding school and parents 
GAHHH DAYUM. i mean in my case, ssat doesnât rlly matter for most schools, but i got a 55th percentile, but, I have great extracurriculars, like dancing for 9 years, multiple clubs (not too much) and a story to tell. my dad died when I was nine, I barely have diversity in my town, and etc. my essays were great, writing about my grandpa who was raised in a fishing village in Nigeria and became a UN Diplomat, and for my grades, I have mostly A- and B+ (sorry if the grammar is like wonky Iâm being so informal rn).
LOL SAME IM ON THIS TOO MUCH. what schools are you looking at
I wouldnât choose the school you attend based on this thread. EVERY BS and school, in general, have a similar percentage of kids who do the âdeed.â Just avoid that crowd, and youâll be fine.
This reply isnât really a reply to this thread, but the SSAT does matter for most schools (Or at least from what Iâve seen).
Donât think youâre fully getting what I mean, but Iâm applying to:
Concord
St. Marks
SPS
Hotchkiss
Dfield
Groton
Taft