My older kid worked full time on a computer programming job the summer before going off to major in CS because that was his idea of fun. He didn’t take any break between graduating from college and starting his permanent job either. Younger son spent the summer before college driving me crazy because he wasn’t busy enough. He did work or do study abroad every other summer. He had a number of breaks looking for work.
As it happens I just took a sabbatical from my job to spend a couple of months in Hong Kong. It was great, I got to do a lot of painting something I had not made time for recently. Not sure it was worth the stress I am under now to make up for all the delayed work! The time off did make me decide to make my job more enjoyable.
A kid can have a summer job or internship that stops a few weeks before college starts.
My daughter worked every summer but as I reflect back I wish she had taken the summer between high school and college off. It’s one summer where they are not worried about building their college application or worried about experience for college level internships. No standardized test prep that one summer.
If I had a do over it would be that we had taken more vacation time, had fun weeks at the beach, let her relax and attend graduations or hang out with her high school friends before everyone goes away to college.
In our area high schools get out end of June and students head to college anytime in August for orientation. He probably has a month of unstructured time that he will probably not get in future summers where he make take a college class or take part in internships. Sometimes the body just needs a break and unstructured time. I would think the summer after high school graduation would be the perfect time to relax and be refreshed for the new college experience. Let them enjoy shopping for their dorm and spending time with longtime friends.
For a time I hosted ESL students of college age who studied here in 8 or so week sessions. The visa rules allow them to not take classes for one of those sessions after a certain number enrolled. These were bright and motivated students from Asia who were used to being busy. I came to dread their time off, as they’d end up bored and grumpy, far less fulfilled than anticipated.
Does your S enjoy unstructured time? Mine were always better off when their schedules included some structure. You know your S, but I also was always aware of the potential for mine to get into less than wholesome activities with friends at that age. Busy worked out better for safety.
Doesn’t he have high school friends he’d like to do something with before they disperse to different colleges? They could go on a road trip together and camping is cheap. Set a destination like the Grand Canyon or Yellowstone that they’ve not been to. Or go backpacking together if he really likes outdoors stuff. I know my kids were keen to spend time with their friends before leaving. They went on an overseas vacation to Europe with a friend (but no parents), which was great for them to be independent.
Jobs can be really hard to come by in that particular summer. For many kids, the summer between high school and college is unusually short because high school ends late and college starts early. Employers may not want to hire a kid who may not even be able to work for 10 weeks.
Both of my kids worked part time the summer between HS and first year of college. One also was gone for 4 weeks at a music festival program. These were employers where they had a good work record…and the employer knew they were HS grads leaving for college. Not an issue.
I think this is a personal decision for each family. For ours, the part time jobs gave the kids ample down time, but also some spending money of their own.
@Twoin18 One limitation is he’s not a very good driver yet, and as far as I know none of his friends are, so while I’m fine with him driving around town, long trips are probably out of the question.
@“great lakes mom” He can usually find what to do with unstructured time, the problem is, he was so busy in HS he didn’t really have a lot, so I’m not sure about big chunks of time. I hope he starts to read books for pleasure again. He also told me he wants to learn to cook. I’m not worried about safety, he’s very mature and careful, and his friends are fairly reasonable too. The problem is, they might be out of town for much of summer.
Any cooking classes near you? I know our local Sur La Table has classes. We also have some culinary schools nearby. What about a CC? Some have culinary classes.
I have to say…my kids both took culinary arts in HS…and both LOVED those classes.
I understand and I have and do feel the same way as you - summers are for relaxing and regrouping. If your son is adamant about an internship, maybe he could work it so that it falls in the middle of his summer; he gets time off at the front and back ends, you get your family vacation, and he has enough free time to decompress on the front end, and ready himself for college on the backend. If, as his summer get underway, he decides to chill the entire summer, he can quit the internship before it starts.
What is that he wants to do? I would let him decide. If internship is something he enjoys, why not let him do it even if you don’t need this financially? You can put his earnings into retirement account and let it grow. As far as structured programs, in my opinion, the only one that worth the money are the highly selective ones. Most of them gear toward rising seniors though, but few are for graduating seniors. My DD attended one of those highly selective summer programs summer of her junior year. Not only she made a life long friends but started to build a great network since all of them ended up in top ten universities and still are very close.
@thumper1 it was unpaid for the first summer and paid for the second, so we’re not sure what it may be this time. I do think earning his own money is a big plus for S. However, last summer he actually told me he didn’t have a chance to rest enough before the new school year. I’m just afraid he’ll dismiss these feelings because he’s “supposed” to do something respectable in summer and wants to earn money.
I think a great family vacation sounds wonderful. And maybe those cooking classes.
Maybe if he gets high school graduation gift money, he will be at ease knowing he has some of his own spending money ?
When does college start for him? One of my kids was on quarters and didn’t start until after mid-September. She was mighty happy to have her summer job since most of her friends left for college mid-August.
Our second kid started right after Labor Day…with his orientation just before.
If your son is one of those leaving for college in mid August, there really won’t be time for a lot of other things…especially if high school ends later in June.