Teen- how to deal with depressive feelings

Parent Cafe
1

<p>I have an account on here proper but I don’t want to divulge my identity, so I made this one.
I am by all accounts high achieving, respectful, thoughtful and reasonably hardworking, if quiet. I have scores, grades, awards, excellent ECs, impact on the community etc. I am extremely unhappy and although my parents are great, they’re kind of…stoic and don’t think a therapist will help. Instead, they think I should ‘power through’ and not worry about my feelings but they are too much for me. </p>

<p>I moved really far away after my frosh year, struggled to make friends at a small school, had many anxiety issues with doing ‘well’ on my stuff, got dealt (what was to me) a crushing blow when something I put basically my life into got rejected and there were some family issues as well. So, my last 3ish years have been really rough. </p>

<p>As a result, I have no desire to do anything. I have no interest in things I used to enjoy - reading, or even watching television. I have anxiety on minor things (think minor tests) and I can’t bring myself to truly enjoy anything at all, even though I sometimes question the teacher a lot because it’s interesting. I am paranoid at night that someone will come and kill my family and can’t sleep. </p>

<p>I have body image problems. I think I’m hideously obese and if I eat any fatty food, I eat very little the rest of the day or obsessively work out (even if it’s late). I got sick and then when I went to the doctor, complained of being overweight. I weighed 121/5’6 but I still consider myself more - eg, when I go on cardio, I write it as 15 pounds more than that. I try to burn 600 calories per hour and sometimes hurt myself in the process. </p>

<p>I squabble significantly with my parents, who often yell/chastise me for my faults. I think this is hurtful for me. I struggle to connect religiously as well which further distances me a bit. I feel guilty for not being better, but I have no energy at all for anything. If I had the choice, I’d lie in bed and sleep all the time. </p>

<p>I’m concerned because I don’t know how to fix myself and I have really high goals for myself. I prepared for 3 years to apply to top schools and now, I don’t even care. I went and talked to a counselor a few times but I hate feeling weak and asking help for this stuff. So, if you have any advice as to deal with this without medication, I would really appreciate it. (Idk if it is really depression, but I certainly feel down a lot. I have a hard time dealing/understanding myself. )</p>

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<p>If I felt as bad as you do I’d be inclined to try anything, including medication. You need to tell an adult how you’re feeling (someone other than your parents) so you can get the help you need. Depression can make you feel that nothing can possibly make you feel better but that is not true. In a perfect world your parents would be finding you the help you need. I’m sorry you’re going through this.</p>

3

<p>Talk to a teacher you respect ASAP. They are mandated by law to intervene if they think you have a serious issue, and it appears that you may very well be depressed. Maybe if this teacher talks with your parents they will see just how serious this situation is, and that it is something that needs immediate attention. Please don’t let your parents apathy stop you from reaching out. Your feelings are legitimate, and no one should tell you how you feel…you are the only one qualified to do so.</p>

<p>You sound like a great kid. Get help, and remember life gets better! High school can be a tough time for many. You are not alone.</p>