<p>My DD will turn 13 on Sunday, making me the parent of two teenagers (DS is 17).</p>
<p>I’ve been thinking about it, and I have to say that I am really enjoying this age more than I did when they were little. I would much rather be able to argue with teens than have to wake up every few hours with infants or chase toddlers around. Early school age kids are pretty good, but there were always issues with bedtime and making sure homework was done, etc.</p>
<p>Now, as teenagers they get themselves to bed on time or they suffer the consequences the next day. They’re much more self directed about school work, too. Most of all, I really like having a couple of intelligent people around with whom to have conversations. They follow current events, read books and have their own unique perspectives on the world.</p>
<p>I realize there will inevitably be some teenage angst and conflict, but so far, I’m liking it. I’m starting to think the idea that teenagers are difficult is a myth.</p>
<p>(On the other hand, the gods may see this post and make my kids turn into unrecognizable monsters tomorrow!)</p>
<p>Go girl! Enjoy it! A recent perspective: it’s all temporary, so don’t fixate on the bad because it will pass…and appreciate the good while you have it as that will eventually pass too.</p>
<p>I feel the same way Megmno! And I feel super lucky that we really haven’t faced the ‘teen years’ with ours, as we’d heard about, despite it being quite a lot of years now. We sooo enjoy our kids…it’s really cool having them around. For the most part, I feel like there isn’t much to parent anymore, yet they are a delight to watch and interact with. But yeah…knock on wood …</p>
<p>I hope things continue to go so well for you. Check back with us when the youngest is 20.
I found many of the teen years with our kids to be beyond horrible.</p>
<p>At the time, I thought some of the teen years were bad, although mine was generally mouthiness and attitude. What I really wasn’t prepared for though, was the ages 18-21 thing. Wow–I think this is MUCH worse than ages 13-17. Legally, they are adults. They make stupid, short-term decisions. They still think mom/dad are morons. You get phone calls <em>help</em> to fix things that were of their own-making. You have no control, but still a lot of responsibility. Yuck. They should go to another planet at age 17 and come back at 25…although my 21 has made great strides. 19 yo–not so much. The 13 yo is still generally nice and pleasant, so agree with the OP. I’m ready this time, though!</p>
<p>I think it depends on the parents. Generally, things will go better if you treat your teens as though they were independent and adults… as long as they follow certain rules and do their chores, etc.</p>
<p>My parents allowed us to have free run of our lives. We had a ten o clock curfew on weekday nights, and we had to call them when we were going somewhere and do our chores. But when we wanted a car, we had to get jobs to pay for insurance and upkeep, etc.</p>
<p>I think my parents did a great job in raising me and my sisters (I have a twin and we are both 17, and an older sister, 20, all girls). My twin and I have been accepted to good colleges with good programs, and tons of scholarships (we are talking only $1500 to pay a year for each of us). We had free choice of the classes we wanted to take, able to have a social life, and get our homework done when we chose.</p>
<p>It’s not always great, but we have earned our parents’ trust, and we make sure to keep it. I know I wouldn’t be the way that I am without them.</p>
<p>My daughter was a good teenager, followed our rules, but we gave her a lot of freedom and she respected us. Our issues mainly stemmed from mouthiness and attitude as another poster mentioned and clashing hormones. She is now 19, and I have to agree it is getting harder because she is an independent person, we have less control and have to accept the fact that we can’t fix all the problems nor does she always listen to our advice or even seek it. Its hard letting go and letting some of the chips fall where they may. But there is still a lot of responsiblilty.</p>
<p>Every age has been the best. Loved the little kid years, got a big kick out of the middle school years, really enjoyed seeing my high schoolers grow up. Now having them out of the house and on their own is awesome! I’ve selectively forgotten all the bad and only remember the good. It’s the silver lining of incipient Alzheimers, or whatever this is that makes me forget people’s names all the time now.</p>
<p>I have 2 who are in the teenage years and 1 who is past them, and I would agree with the OP that I’ve enjoyed the teenage years. Maybe it’s because my kids were difficult when they were young. It seems like they got it out of their system then, and have been pretty good as teens.</p>
<p>The teen years passed in our home with little fuss other than the typical, “When can I get a car” and “I don’t like that chore,” kind of thing…LOL. Neither kids ever got into any kind of trouble (thank God!!! )</p>
<p>When they were growing up, I practiced the following, (even when they were young): I take each child out for a long lunch (just mom and child) about every month or so. Now that they are in college, that can only be done on breaks. It’s amazing what a child will tell you when no siblings and no other parent is around.</p>
<p>I am with Marinmom: every stage was the best. (adding: every stage had its challenges, too.) I have loved being my boy’s mother, even when he wasn’t so thrilled with the arrangement! Now he seems to wear the “burden” pretty graciously and, often, gratefully.</p>