<p>Have you ever snooped and looked at your teen’s cell phone? What would you do if you found items of concern? (not a college age teen—a few years younger) Had this conversation at a weekend gathering and the opinions were all over. Curious what others think.</p>
<p>I haven’t. My kids share one phone, and I think that helps eliminate some of the stuff that could go on. Also, texting is not enabled, so that’s not a concern.</p>
<p>To answer the second question, I’d certainly talk to them if I found something that concerned me.</p>
<p>No…I make a point not to snoop and look at cell phones or snoop around room, facebook etc… My philosophy is that if the kids don’t give me reason to snoop…ie…lying…obvious signs of drinking, drugs…etc I will give them the benefit of the doubt. Am I naive? If they get caught…that changes everything …after all it is my house…and my rules. So far its worked out good…the worse thing is D missing curfew by 10 or 15 minutes almost every time…annoying but really not the worst…lol…</p>
<p>Mine are college age. I never checked messages on phones when they were in h.s. I have a friend who reads texts on her h.s kids’ phones. She reads their emails too.</p>
<p>My youngest is nearly 19 so NO, I don’t touch their cell phones, email, facebook etc.; and I never have.<br>
However, if I had a younger teen who had texting and a camera phone, I might.</p>
<p>GQ ran a tragic and compelling article this month about a “sextortion” case in a Milwaukee WI high school.
[SEXTORTION</a> AT EISENHOWER HIGH: GQ Features on men.style.com](<a href=“http://men.style.com/gq/features/landing?id=content_10178]SEXTORTION”>http://men.style.com/gq/features/landing?id=content_10178)</p>
<p>Parents of younger teens 13/14 REALLY should snoop facebook. My 14 y/o D and her friends recently have been horrified at what some of the girls in their grade are posting about themselves and posting pics of the activities.
This new form of media is new territory, not seen or experienced by adults let alone children. They “think” showing pics of themsevles is gaining them some perverse sense of popularity, I don;t know if they truly realize what they are getting themselves into, and it is a form of voyeurism and they don’t understand what they are doing to their futures and reputations. It seems to me it they keep wanting to outdo the last most outrageous photo with another. Do they not know who is able to view this garbage?</p>
<p>GQ story is amazing. I can’t believe all those boys went along with the extortion.</p>
<p>I read the GQ story with a sense of disbelief…It’s a scary world. Your comments on this topic mirror much of what I heard this weekend, but one parent was extremely vocal on honoring a teen’s sense of privacy. Another parent felt strongly that “he who pays for the cell phone bill has a right to oversee its use”. I think when concerning behavior appears, it’s perhaps important to “snoop” and investigate. I guess I’d rather invade my kid’s privacy and have them strongly dislike me for awhile than see them get into a situation that has lifelong consequences. ???</p>
<p>My D already says she hates me at least once a week. I view that as I am doing at least an OK job as a parent. The last time I looked at her IM thread, it was so boring I gave up. Most messages were a long the lines of what are you doing - nothing.</p>
<p>^
you could have been me a few years ago!</p>
<p>My kids grew up on the internet - I got my first computer in 1996 when my now 19 and 20 year old were we ones. They learned to use it right away and got their own email addresses when they were 9 and 10.
No way would I let a 9 year old have an email address but they never use email any way.
Before there was facebook there was Xanga and My Space. I could see those and we had many long discussions about internet safely and I made every opportunity to find and use “teachable” moments.</p>
<p>I think a child’s privacy should be a function of age and maturity. There is a huge difference between a 14 year old and a 17 year old. </p>
<p>As far as the GQ article - it boggles my mind.</p>