<p>Ok, so Zoosergirl got her license about 3 1/2 weeks ago. She seems to be quite a good driver and is a very responsible person generally, but I’m having a hard time figuring out what she’s ready for and what she’s not. She works about 5-10 minutes from the house and wants to drive there alone and then drive to school soon, which is about 25 minutes away through an area of heavy traffic. How did you guys figure out when your teen drivers were ready? Did you take a leap of faith at some point?</p>
<p>How many times has she driven to these places with you in the passenger seat? If she knows the way, usual hazards and lane changes, stop signs etc. I would let her go. No friends in the car for a least 3 months was our rule (also no riding with newly licensed friends for 3 mo). At some point there is a leap of faith which turns out to be more gut instinct and last minute decision making than anything else. Oh, the joys…</p>
<p>Thanks Sax. She’s driven to work countless times with either hubby or me in the car and past the school, as well, but she’s never parked at school, which might be complicated. Maybe we should practice that.</p>
<p>We were very similar to sax: Lots of the learner’s permit driving was specifically doing the things our kids would do once they started to drive themselves, so that by the time they drove themselves to school we (and they) were really confident they could handle it. Plus, limits on giving rides to other kids and using the radio/cd player for several months.</p>
<p>The freaky thing about New York is that during the learner’s permit period they are only allowed to drive in vehicles with dual brakes, so that’s driver’s ed and whatever private lessons are purchased. I think this is actually a terrible law because they are taught at driver’s ed how to pass the road test, but don’t receive as much actual driving experience as I would like. We did get her several lessons and hubby has been driving with her almost constantly for the last 3 1/2 weeks, but we have to make a judgment call here. I’ve actually been concerned about some of her classmates. The director of driver’s ed made it was adamant that even though licensed, these kids have a lot of learning left to do, but many of her classmates have been driving on their own since day one. Her best friend’s parents have her driving in a 20-year old pickup truck. It’s been snowy here and there have been no end to problems. I could be wrong, but I’m thinking that vehicle doesn’t have airbags. I hope she will be safe.</p>
<p>The school parking lot is one of my biggest concerns. At dismissal time, everyone is in a rush to get out of school and get home. The kids drive out of that lot at incredible speeds. There have been numerous accidents in the parking lot alone. And this is a relatively small school My daughter has had her license for 5 months and we have let her take the car alone maybe 10-15 times. Since we share a car, I pick my daughter up every day and then let her drive home, so she is getting a lot of experience with me in the car. We have let her take the car to school twice on days when she can leave early and the weather has been good. One girl who received her license the same day as my daughter has her own car and has been driving alone since she received her license. I have witnessed some incredibly dumb driving mistakes from that child. Apparently her parents have incredible confidence in her abilities, including letting her drive in the first snow storm of the season.</p>
<p>Being a fellow NY’er, zoosermom, I can tell you what I have heard some parents do locally. They do as you have done and drive repeatedly with their kids to the same destination, work/school, over and over. I know one mom who drove for weeks with her child to the high school which was almost 1/2 hour away. Child would drive there, and mom would take the car home. At some point (weeks? months?) you just have to let them try by themselves. Personally, I wouldn’t allow my child to drive that kind of distance yet in lousy weather. I realize they have to learn to drive in winter weather eventually, but not after 1 month of being licensed. The short distance to work would naturally come more quickly than the longer distance to school. I will be confronting this issue within the next year and already have gone through this once. You have my sympathy. ;)</p>
<p>Growing up in NY I got my permit on my 16th Jan. birthday and had my license within the week. Grabbed the car keys and I was off in my dad’s chevy impala with a huge engine, no air bags and no seat belts. Good grief, it scares me to even type that! My first 360 was on Turk Hill Road leaving the high school in a snowstorm. What were they thinking?</p>
<p>35 yrs. later NY has not kept up with the rest of the nation in demanding that their new drivers are eased into driving in as safe a manner as possible. It is a shame they force the responsibility on the parent instead of enacting laws to make it the same learning curve for all.</p>
<p>Stick to your guns, Zoosermom, keep her safe and let her build her and your confidence at a slow and steady pace.</p>
<p>Thank you all very much. My gut is telling me that work is ok because it’s right on one road that isn’t too busy, whereas school can be tricky. I think she’ll take the bus to school for a while yet.</p>
<p>Does your D’s school have assigned parking spaces or is it an “every man for himself” situation. Our h.s kids get a sticker with a number on it and that is the only spot they can park in. This makes a less chaotic in the mornings, nobody jockeying for a spot. Afternoons in every high school are probably crazy. I know ours is. My S says he just waits until the majority of the kids get out and then he gets out with no trouble.</p>
<p>In our state, kids can get permit anytime after age 15 but must keep it and drive with parents for a full year before they can get their license. Both S’s chauferred me everywhere we went for a full year each. S1 was still not the best driver and had a few bump-ups (nothing too serious) in the first year of driving alone, none since. S2 seems to be a better driver, has had his license for a year and no problems yet…knock on wood. I think it gets to a point where you just have to let them go and say a prayer. Each drove with me for a full year. How do you determine when there has been enough practice? It’s a leap of faith.</p>
<p>“Does your D’s school have assigned parking spaces or is it an “every man for himself” situation.”</p>
<p>They don’t have any on-campus parking. They share a block with a middle and an elementary school, neither of which has parking. The neighborhood is all single-family homes with driveways, so only one vehicle can fit between each two driveways. The actual street is known to be a madhouse, but if she were to park a block or so away, she could park on a quiet residential street and then drive away from the school. The question is will she do that.</p>
<p>My son was almost 18 when he got his license. He was the only one of his friends who didn’t have any tickets or huge traffic accidents. One kid went through a windshield. Try to keep them from driving a car as long as possible.</p>
<p>We put limits on our son’s driving after he got his license and we got major grief about it (seems like we were the only ones doing it). We restricted how many kids were in the car (only one other until he had a year under his belt). We also nixed driving in bad weather in the first year and long trips on roads he wasn’t familiar with. IMO, kids are over-confident about driving and need to be eased into it. Things turned out well…I wonder if he’ll end up doing the same for his kids (right now he says no way!).</p>
<p>Wow, that is bizarre that NY does not allow you to drive with your kids before the license is issued. We have our kids drive with us for an entire year before getting their licenses. The oldest was mad to drive and she got her permit day one and her license a year later, as soon as she could. She drove tons that year, including cross country with a fully loaded SUV, even stuff on roof- unable to use her review mirror. All our kids are expected to not only drive to & from school and activities with us, but also to the mall, across international borders (nearby); on and off ferries, through snow and ice, over moutain passes. Anything about which I would worry, I want them to do with ME the first time, not with a car load of kids.</p>
<p>TR: we, too, we the only ones who enforced these kinds of rules and are the only ones who enforce the time limit after license not allowing friends, and, thus far (knock wood) our kids are some of the only ones who have not had tickets and totaled cars. Also, when/if our kids whine about the restrictions, we point out that it is our car & our insurance, they are welcome to provide their own if they don’t like our rules :)</p>
<p>Arriving early and leaving late is a good solution to the problems with the school parking lot. At my daughter’s school, parking is a free-for-all situation (due to construction, there is no parking lot; the kids have to park on the street, competing for spaces with the construction workers). The safest approach is to show up at least a half-hour before classes start and to wait until the crowd has died down before attempting to leave in the afternoon.</p>
<p>I suggest letting her solo to the closer locations you’re most comfortable with first and gradually letting her do more. This eases you both into it and gives her the solo experience where she doesn’t have a co-pilot she can rely on.</p>
<p>A lot of dents, dings, and scratches occur during parking and leaving parking areas. I suggest practicing parking including backing into spots and parallel parking. Sometimes a couple of cones (hardware stores have them) can be helpful for practicing.</p>
<p>You might want to check out alternate routes to school that might be a bit longer but less hectic for her to take until she gains more experience.</p>
<p>Boy, I’m glad I live in PA and I will be more careful driving in NY! Our kids get their permits at 16 after having passed a written test but have to drive 50 hours with an adult over 21 and minimum of 6 months after getting the permit and then take the driving test. Our HS has assigned spots but at dismissal, it seems to be every man for themselves and the kids drive out at record speeds. Zoosermom, can your daughter drive the car to the school with you or your husband riding shotgun for a few times just so you can assure her (and yourself) that it’s a safe ride? After school you could meet her there and she could drive home. I may be being overly cautious but since you mentioned heavily traveled roads, that’s what I would do. </p>
<p>Excellent idea about alternate routes too. For the new drivers that don’t have much of a navigation sense, it’s really good to know how roads connect so if there’s an accident or heavy traffic, they can still get to where they’re going.</p>
<p>My major concerns when my son started to drive were pedestrians and kids on bikes or skateboards. We have several busy intersections in our town with lots of pedestrians and turning cars. I also was concerned about parking lots and backing up. I don’t think I’d be very comfortable with a new driver around an elementary school or busy streets – even though accidents can happen anywhere. </p>
<p>We took signals from my son. Although he wanted to drive as soon as he got his license, of course, we could see how much he concentrated on the driving and steering at first and didn’t take in all of the things going on outside the car – such as pedestrians, cars pulling out of parked spaces, etc. So we spent a lot of time having him drive with us in the car after he got his license and we slowly, as we felt comfortable, lifted our restrictions.</p>
<p>In MA, kids get their permit at 16 if they’ve taken driver’s ed, following the written test. They must drive with a driver over 21 in the passenger seat. The amount of driving hours with a parent or driver over 21 has been significantly increased, I think to 30 hours or so (my d got her license when it was only 12 hours required). Once they get their license, for the first 6 months, they cannot drive with anyone under 18 in the car unless there is a 21 year old or older in the passenger seat (except siblings). We strictly enforced this regulation with my d, although it is respected more in the breach around here. At least she knew that if we ever heard about it, she’d lose her driving privileges.</p>
<p>We also made sure that her first few times on a highway were with us; I can’t tell you the number of kids who tackled major highways for the first time on their own. Her dance studio is about 35-40 minutes away, up that highway, so she drove to and from dance a lot. That really helped.</p>
<p>After 3 1/2 weeks licensed, though, I wouldn’t let her do that alone, particularly with the permitting process as you describe.</p>
<p>I also would have a serious problem with her driving to school without a parking space. What you’re describing is a recipe for disaster, particularly on tough travel days. Kids will naturally attempt not to be late for school. So she may be tempted to try to park illegally or unsafely, speed, etc. And parallel parking is not the easiest technique to master. I still don’t like to do it!</p>
<p>Sounds like driving to work may be OK, though.</p>
<p>Oh, d has been driving for a year now. I still worry.</p>
<p>Question about license examiners–how many are actually policemen? (I’m from PA).</p>
<p>I’m wondering for two reasons:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>I saw a job offering for a drivers license examiner, always thought it was a policeman’s duty, and then the guy I took my test from four years ago was in a PennDOT uniform and not a police uniform, plus he hated that I referred to him as “sir” (I had thought policemen gave the tests).</p></li>
<li><p>Can a PennDOT worker (or any DOT) who gives tests issue traffic citations?</p></li>
</ol>