<p>So here its 10:53 at night and I’m feeling sad. i just finished a really good series of books. But its not the end that makes me sad its my first love and the role books have to do with it. So i’ll tell my story so i can stop feeling heartbroken about it.</p>
<p>So it was sixth grade, the boy sat in my honors english class. He loved ■■■■■■ and the lord of the rings and hobbits and dan Brown books. i thought he was amazing because he was smart and interesting (like vibrant/alive). One day , I borrowed a book from him The Hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy. It was funny irreverent humor, and I loved it. A little time passed. I sat next to him in my sixth grade English class, dreamed ,joked with him, read books by him ,looked out the window. I let him borrow a book by Nancy Farmer- the Sea of ■■■■■■ and he wanted toread it. He did. And then I read the book. we talked and laughed about the book. That day at recess I found all of his jokes so funny for some reason ( I didn’t know what was happening,of course, I had no idea I was starting to crush on him). I borrowed another book from him, read most of it any way…not important. When I gave the book back to him and tried to say thank you. I stammered and felt embaressed and didn’t know what to say. For the first time in my life I was speechless ( I am absolutely never speechless), and then I knew what had happened.
And other people in the school were starting to realize it too.
So, in order to protect my academic reputation as a nerd - I ignored him, stopped talking to him, made fun of him and tried to ignore the feeling I felt when he was around like the sun was burning too brightly right next to me. In seventh grade, he went out with someone else. And i moved away in seventh grade.
I never told him I how i felt about him.
And today I finished that Nancy farmer’s series. memories.
Whatever,(brushes tears), he would probably only have made fun of me anyway.
What am i kidding myself ? I’ll never like anyone like that again.</p>
<p>why? is it abnormal Saugus?
No, I never saw him again. I moved . to another state. I mean, obviously my life has moved on- but I’m still sad about it sometimes.</p>
<p>I dnt remember who my first crush was?lol, I’m trying not to focus on guys and stuff, but I have plenty of friends and my band world is rockin so its all good :)</p>
<p>My first “crush” was in 1st grade. Once, we were walking outside to the water fountain and he let me get a drink before him. I thought that was sweet. Then he promptly pushed my face in to the water and then walked away giggling. idk why I even liked him.</p>