<p>Have any of your kids stayed at school over the Thanksgiving break? How was it for them? We live on the West Coast and our daughter will be a freshman at an East Coast school next fall. The fall break is so short – Wednesday through Sunday – and airfares are so expensive that week, that we are thinking of having her stay at school over the break. What do you think? We don’t want her lonely and traumatized, but also aren’t sure we want to spend $500 to bring her home for four days when Christmas break is just three weeks later. Obviously, we’re on a budget. If money were no object, we’d love to fly her home for a few days.</p>
<p>I stayed at school most Thanksgivings and we had a grand feast/party at our house. In a dorm it might be tougher but there probably be a few friends she could get together with and cook or go out together.</p>
<p>Our D did not fly home for Thanksgiving first or second year. Friends thought we were mean, but she was fine with it. She too came home for Christmas on Dec.9, so definitely not worth it. Plus they had finals right after TG. </p>
<p>Tons of kids stayed on campus. They had TG-type food on campus. But both years she and her friends had many invitations from near-by students to come over for dinner, and that was a wonderful experience for all.</p>
<p>Besides the cost of TG flights, even worse is the aggravation. It is one of the worst times to be flying. Airports are congested, flights are backed up, and weather is starting to get unpredictable by then. Our D did not want the possibility of spending hours and hours at airports.</p>
<p>In fact my S is going to school a mere 2 hour drive from home. I am hoping to fill the house with lots of his new friends who could not fly home for Thanksgiving.</p>
<p>Have your D make friends with local/east coast kids. She may get lucky and get invited for Thanksgiving dinner. Our D is in boston and we are in So Cal. That’s what D did and she took the bus to NYC to dinner with friend and friend’s family.</p>
<p>No worries fiskelove, your D will have so many thanksgiving invites from her friends’ and roomates’ families, she won’t know which to accept! We flew my D from Boston to Denver last year, her freshman year. But I think next year she’ll stay in Boston in view of the high cost of airfare. She already has 3 invitations from kind northeasterns happy to have her over for the holiday.</p>
<p>My East Coast son was at his West Coast school for three of four Thanksgivings. (During his junior year, he spend the fall quarter in Washington, DC and came home. When he was a freshman, he had Thanksgiving dinner at a huge and very fancy feast put on by the school’s dining service. The other two years he was invited to the homes of friends who lived nearby. I am sure it will also work out well for your daughter.</p>
<p>S (at west coast school) was invited–along with a group of stray students–to a professor’s home for Thanksgiving. I’m sure he had more fun there and avoided the stress and expense of traveling. There will probably be a lot of other students staying around. I’m sure your daughter won’t be alone or go hungry.</p>
<p>fiske
S who is at school 900 miles from home did make arrangements to come home for the first Thanksgiving,but had many invites he could have taken advantage of.All completely new friends.I’ll bet next time he doesnt bother to fly home,as you say its such a short time.
Don’t worry!</p>
<p>The experience depends on how social your child is. Our daughter spent her freshman Thanksgiving at school and we okayed it, thinking that lots of other kids would be around. Well, there were a few international students, but they were scattered among the dorms. The school cafeteria was closed, the library and student union had very limited hours, so our daughter spent her time surfing the net, playing video games with a couple of kids, and surviving on EasyMac. She did have Thanksgiving dinner at an off campus house, but otherwise it was an awfully quiet week and she was lonely. This from a kid who prizes solitude.</p>
<p>We’ll let her fly home this year if she wishes.</p>
<p>My D has stayed both years over T’giving. Last year, soph year, was a little tough. She went home with a friend for T’giving dinner which was great, but then spent the rest of the weekend being very lonely (The year before she went home with the same friend for the whole weekend, which was quite gracious, but a little long). She had saved up a lot of work, they have finals almost immediately after T’giving, that’s why she doesn’t come home. She was in an old dorm, though, and it was the first REALLY cold weekend, and she couldn’t figure out how to get the heat on, she though she was going to freeze by Sat ight.</p>
<p>If the school has a lot of students from all around the country, she should be fine. A lot of students stay over Thanksgiving, especially with such a short break, and usually dining halls or somewhere else serve a Thanksgiving-like meal. My sister has brought classmates to our house for Thanksgiving dinner before. I ended up going home this year; I’m not sure about next.</p>
<p>At some colleges, the dorms do NOT stay open over Thanksgiving break. This seems to be the case mostly at state universities that draw mainly from a relatively nearby population, but it’s important to check. If the dorms close, your daughter would either have to find a friend to stay with or check into a hotel – and some hotels are reluctant to rent rooms to college-age kids.</p>
<p>Your daughter will probably also need extra food money since the meal plan may not be operating during the break. She may have to pay cash for food either on campus or in the community.</p>
<p>At Thanksgiving, D. flies only half-way home. Her paternal grandmother is a much cheaper and shorter flight away, so she goes there and they enjoy a nice long visit with a lot of 1:1 time that they wouldn’t otherwise get.</p>
<p>At some schools, professors open up their homes to students who need somewhere to go for dinner. At my school, an email was sent out with a list of profs who were doing it that year. You didn’t even have to know the prof; you could just RSVP. I knew a couple people who did it, but usually they went in pairs and/or already knew the prof. It’s not for everyone, but it is a nice chance to get a home-cooked meal, and a very generous way for profs to interact with students. I’m guessing it only happens at small LACs though.</p>
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<li><p>Look on the college website and see if there’s a parent’s association attached to the college. Some colleges have them. Some of the parents who involve themselves this way live within reasonable distnace of the college, and they can be on hand to volunteer at big events. If you were to email that association now and pose the question, you might get good guidance for what to do…or, with luck, an actual invitation.</p></li>
<li><p>Getting to know friends who live within a 2-hour drive is very helpful. And she doesn’t have to just “mooch” off their good hospitatity. If she offers up your home sometime, and they want to fly out and visit on Spring Break, or during the summer, they can see a whole different part of the country some day. So it’s a barter. Lots of kids can scrape up money for airfare across the country, but they can’t afford a hotel for a week. This way, they get to explore a new region.</p></li>
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