<p>I’m still waiting, myself - S doesn’t return until Dec 10 - but I would be very interested in hearing what you noticed, if anything, that is different about your student since the start of college.</p>
<p>More mature! More, I don’t know, thoughtful, or measured, somehow. More tolerant, more independent. He patiently answered everyone’s questions - which I felt good about. Things that are unchanged - still messy, still thinks a servant lives here, still playing computer games, still puts way too many clothes in the washing machine, still broke with no apparent plans for getting money!</p>
<p>hmmm… weenie’s and my S must be closely related species, but not exact matches. DS seems more mature in the way he communicates. Just a beginning, really, but a subtle shift away from the need to distance himself through reticence and silence. Room left as messy as when he lived there full time. But the two things that amazed me: (1) he put things away in the kitchen after preparing himself a snack! (2) he is WAY less dependent on the computer - his laptop is stranded at Tulane, his desktop at Bates, he used my iBook a bit but when it crashed he just shrugged. Amazing x2!</p>
<p>How is the fact that he plays computer games a negative attribute? Do you spend 24/7 engaging in activities that broaden your mind, or are you like everyone else, and spend some time in leisure activity?</p>
<p>i dont think that that was the point…</p>
<p>Vyse: Do you have something to add to this conversation…as a parent?</p>
<p>My S now enjoys watching football! This was a shock to both me and H. Growing up, she never once showed an interest in any sport, but yesterday he watched a game with H and was conversant about it. He’s been going to games at college and become interested, I guess. Also, he offered to help me clean the kitchen!!!</p>
<p>I went into S’s just vacated room and could hardly believed how neat it was, though he spent nearly a week at home. The bed was made (!) and he even took his dirty laundry back to his dorm (!!!). I’m still slightly stunned.</p>
<p>Well, my son doesn’t seem to have changed much. He was already pretty mature for his age when he left, so that hasn’t changed. He didn’t make his bed or keep his room any neater. (although he says he does both at school, now that he has a girl friend…) He just loved being home, eating home cooking, and hanging out with his old friends. I guess he might have been a little more appreciative of what we do for him…</p>
<p>Yeah, Marite, mine is neater too! I think it is because her roommate is messy and the room is tiny and it is a new survival skill. She seemed a bit more mature and confident, though she was both before leaving home. She seemed very happy!</p>
<p>His hair was longer and he stayed out later. Very happy to see all his old friends. At several family events over the weekend he was asked “How’s school?” The answer was “It’s awesome”, said with a big grin.</p>
<p>where are they all at school?</p>
<p>D was home from Rice. Much happier kid overall. Loves everything about school. Has made LOTS of new friends, has her first real boyfriend. Talked a bit about things when asked but seems to want to keep some things to herself. Could not wait to go back… did I say that loud enough? Could not WAIT to go back. Enjoyed seeing her old friends, visiting with family but she said she didn’t know how she would make it for a month over Christmas break. Still loves to sleep, still messy. Wants to learn how to play Texas Hold Em. Told me not to expect her to ever return “that close to home again”… Happy, happy, happy.</p>
<p>My DS has much longer hair (even after a trim) and a beard, but underneath all the hair, he is the same kid. It was fun having him home and all of his friends over. He knew that they were welcome at our home and took advantage of that, which was nice, but exhausting. My H and I are not used to the late nights. Still together with his gf, she is one of the Tulane refugees at Rice and is heading back to NO this January. He is at UF and loves Gainesville. Interesting thing, of his hs friends, the ones that are on the coasts (ie. Florida or California) all have long shaggy hair and beards. The ones that stayed in Texas all have shorter, neater hair. It must have something to do with sea air?!?</p>
<p>My son did his own laundry.</p>
<p>My daughter learned how to put chains on her car.</p>
<p>D stayed out on the West Coast to celebrate Thanksgiving with big bro (who’s living and working there post-graduation), aunt (who lives in LA), and grandparents who flew out there from the Midwest, plus one college friend and a HS friend. From all accounts, she enjoyed the respite away from campus but is looking forward to coming home mid-December for winter break.</p>
<p>H and I had a small (8.9#) turkey–more like a chicken on steroids. It was quiet with phone calls to family to break up the solitude. Friday we drove down for an overnight trip to NYC (had a free night at a Secaucus hotel) to take in the sights and sounds of the holiday–one of the benefits of having an empty nest.</p>
<p>dmd!! OMG!! functional children!!! KUDOS.</p>
<p>One thing I am thinking is that we need to plan some STUFF for Xmas break. D was happy just chilling for 4 days (when I suggested stuff she told me she just wanted to rest) but I suspect home is going to get really boring when it is several weeks… However, if I sprinkle in a facial, some theatre, a little mini-trip to Palm Springs for some sun, a dinner party for her friends, etc-- I think I can make it more entertaining for her to be home.</p>
<p>SBmom - I, too, have been thinking that 4 weeks home starting mid-December could get a little monotonous for DS. However, I don’t think a facial will perk him up. What in the heck to do for a DS? Let him figure it out, I guess. But maybe a couple of movies… With Mom?! :eek:</p>
<p>jmmom, you mean he is not a metrosexual?</p>
<p>LOL ag54, my native NY’er came home from TEXAS with long hair and a beard and mustache. He cut his hair immediatley (hated it that long) but the facial hair remains. So nothing in the water! He said he couldn’t find a barber in Texas! He goes to Rice and also couldn’t wait to go back “home”. He said it was the best 3 months of his life. I know we’ll see him again, because we’re ending the holiday break with a vacation in the islands…and that he won’t miss!
He was very glad to see us and his friends. He also said that he welcomed the fact that “our relationship has changed” and we no longer have to yell or bug him, nor do we need to take control. Yikes, I think he did mature!..but he still likes video games…but that’s why he’s majoring in Computer Science.
AH Vyse, video games are addicting and can take you away from studies and making real friends…parents understand that! TV is too boring to watch for hours and hours. With Video games you get rewarded for playing longer and longer and longer. It’s the curse of the younger generation.<br>
Luckily my son seems to have it under control and has made lots of friends. He loves the residential college life, it’s like being in a fraternity/sorority and making instant friends, without having to be “chosen” or left out.
Not long until the next break :-)</p>