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Cant read this- not a subscriber.
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I love this article.
I just had a milestone birthday and I’m thinking a lot about aging. I have only a finite number of years left – though I don’t know exactly how many – so I’m trying to prioitize what’s important to me and not waste time with nonsense.
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Thanks @oldmom4896.
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I am another year older today, and I can honestly say that I am a much better person now than I was when I was younger. I appreciated reading about possible reasons for this. I am so much more comfortable being me, I am thankful to be alive, and I know that all the years I have spent on this planet have helped me to gain the wisdom I needed in order to stop focusing on things that don’t matter. Thanks for the article!
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I love how the article avoids discussing the approach of The Grim Reaper. Isn’t that what the fear of aging is all about ultimately? Improving your outlook and mood, divesting yourself of the things that don’t matter, becoming more at ease with your body and soul are all well and good, but the end of all this improvement is death. I’d like to see an article that honestly addresses how our improved selves face and embrace mortality. (I’m a person of faith with a belief in eternity, but there is still that big cross-over step to deal with…)
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Agree with you, Choatiemom. That’s the big issue. I’ve been following a “death doula” on Instagram and she has some interesting ideas on dealing directly with that…
Edit to add: here is the website of the death doula (“Going with Grace”).
Arthur Brooks (the author of this article) also has an excellent podcast on the subject , as well as a best-selling book. TL:DR? Don’t look back, look forward, and embrace the chance to hand knowledge down to younger people. And stop eating poorly 
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Gosh, no. Not for me. I’m athiest and believe when we’re dead we’re dead. But my fears about getting older are about becoming incapacitated mentally or physically and not dying. I’d rather be dead. I’d also like to have my affairs in order in the easiest ways for my kids but I’m not afraid of the Grim Reaper. I’m afraid of the Grim Incapacitator. I’ve seen enough of that. I’d like to keep my faculties sharp and my body healthy and just drift off in the night. Nice way to go.
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You can look forward to competing in higher age divisions in sports events.
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A friend’s dad ran a marathon or half marathon (can’t remember which) when he was in his 80s!! I’m lucky if a get a couple miles of walking in myself.
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A couple of miles walking is fine. No one has to run a marathon if they don’t want to. The point of it all is to enjoy where you are, not to fret because you haven’t done this, that, or the other thing.
I’m rereading The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch, the Carnegie Mellon professor who died of pancreatic cancer. He just tries to live his remaining months spending time with people who are important to him, doing what he enjoys, and letting the bad stuff roll off his back.
It’s a lesson I’m now trying to incorporate.
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There is a 78-year-old woman in my run group who still runs a sub-30 5k
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And there will always be people who do more or do better than we do. At this point in my life (I’m 75), I just want to be proud of what I do. Comparisons are a waste of time. All they do is make us feel inadequate, when we are truly quite adequate!
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Way to go for her!!
Someone else’s accomplishment doesn’t have to be a point of comparison to bring you down. When I said my friend’s dad ran a marathon in his 80s and I was doing well if I walked a few miles I didn’t mean to be disparaging myself although I can see how it came across that way. I just meant it as a joke. I have no desire to run a marathon.
I think we can enjoy and cheer on others in their accomplishments without feeling like we are less than if we can’t do the same thing. I know I have long since given up those comparisons on things I’m not interested in (like marathons). I do love to see older folks (and younger folks) out there doing something they love though. My sister ran marathons for awhile (NYC, maybe DC, and others) and it’s just not my kinda thing so yay for her! I’ll cheer from the sidelines!
As they say “you do you” or to put it in 60s/70s parlance, “ do your own thing”. To read about someone else’s accomplishment does not mean you are a lesser human being. I don’t want to be an accountant but if I had a friend who won an accounting award I’d be happy for her. I’ll cheer her on and get on with doing my own thing and being me.
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Amen.
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Happy Birthday @kelsmom
I feel much the same way. I was recently talking with a friend from college and I told her I am a better person. In addition to the reasons you have stated I think knowing more people and hearing their stories has made me more empathetic and realize that there are so many nuances to many things.
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Not just hearing their stories … but listening to them.
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I need to reread that book.
TY for the reminder. It’s good one.