I am - I feel a tiny bit guilty but I KNOW I have to be ruthless to get it out of the house unhindered and unsearched.
@swimcatsmom when I feel guilty about tossing stuff that could be donated I tell myself that I am donating to the homeless people that dumpster dive. That helps me get past the guilt.
My sister lives in a large city and she says that when she wants to dispose of potentially useful items, she puts them in tihe alley behind her house and they disappear, even without a Craigslist âfree at curbâ posting.
Unfortunately I live outside of city limits (of a very small City). We have to pay a private contractor to pick up our trash and anything that doesnât fit in the bin is charged extra. We donât get the benefit of the city picking up large items. And no one picks up stuff we leave outside. If Iâd known what a junk collector my H is when we moved here Iâd have bought in the city where they wouldnât allow all the outside junk yard or in a place with a strict HOA!
The waste hauling company for my city will pick up large items, but they charge at least $20 per item. When I wanted to get rid of a moldy futon several years ago, my then-husband suggested that instead of having the waste hauler take it for $20, I should CUT IT UP and put it into the garbage can. Yeah, that would have been fun.
I think a better idea would have been for your husband to cut it up. 
By that point, he was spending most of his time at his parentsâ house and he was not contributing much to the decluttering. I was grateful that he hauled the futon out of the basement and out of the house to the curb. Dismemberment would definitely have to have been on my time.
Of the futon or the ex?
Iâm sure I considered both at least subconsciously!
swimcatsmom, I did do just that. When I decided to build I made sure there was an HOA.
I do not love everything about them but I do appreciate that H cannot make a stockpile of extra wood
from projects that our lovely neighbors had to look about of their living room window for a few years until I discovered it. Yet! He has had a fit about our upper neighbors and their mess only seen if your go to the lower level and out a side door. H called him out through our HOA. No Way does he see that he did the same thing but even worse.
H is a hoarder. We finished a major house addition/remodel 16 years ago. We still had about 10 2x4s, old paneling, etc stacked up in the garage that he âsavedâ in case we needed these items in the future. Well, the drywall rotted around our garage door (lots of ice and snow every year) so this past summer I contracted to have that replaced. He had not used ONE item he had saved, so out it went to the dumpster at my office. I also got rid on 3 bags of old sports equipment left from the âboysâ who are 30 and 32. He didnât realize it was gone until I put back what I keptâŠ
@dentmom4, my ex-husband saved stuff like that, too. The large boards and similar items have been very difficult for me to dispose of, because theyâre so big!
Could you pay someone to dispose of it for you? Eventually Iâm going to have to pay someone to clear the bigger junk items. I canât physically do it and H couldnât even if he was willing (which heâs not,). Part of our front yard is littered with old boilers, broken ride on mowers, batteries (no idea where most if them come from - we certainly havenât gone through that many), not to mention several old junk cars. Ugh. No way I can even conceive of doing it myself. One if my firms partners wife will probably help me find someone trustworthy to do it when the time comes. She us in insurance and knows everyone.
Our long time neighbors are selling to move to his late grandparents farm. I was hoping he might ask if he could help us get rid if the outside junk so his house would show better but they already have a potential buyer before it went on the market. (Each house has an acre so our mess isnât right in their face). Theyâve been great neighbors. We even share a vegetable garden half on their property half on ours. H will miss him. One of his few social contacts nowadays.
I thought of you on this thread yesterday listening to one of my podcasts. They had a guest and were talking about âFinding More Life In Less Stuffâ - with Joshua Becker a writer of some books on minimalism - but not to extreme!
https://www.becomingminimalist.com/
Anyway, this maybe 15 minute or so interview was VERY VERY good. Talking about making choices of âstuffâ to live better - like actually have more life time. Some of his points really hit home. As the podcasters say, " He shares how to stop the slow creep of household clutter, what minimizing can teach our kids, and how it might even help you achieve some of your biggest life goals that have nothing to do with organizing or paring down."
If you want an easy listen (while youâre cleaning out a drawerâŠ) go to this link look for the podcast to click listen. His interview starts about 6:30 minutes in - you can move the audio forward to start there (though I love this podcast - itâs called Young House Love and is about home renovation, decorating, organization, DIY, etc. - a CC member got me hooked on it!!)
https://www.younghouselove.com/podcast-128/
I definitely will be hiring someone to clear away the big stuff. I took a first step late last year. I hired a person to pick up and take away lumber from a treehouse that my ex had disassembled but not cleared away several years ago. (Based on the evidence and the âcrime scene,â my belief is that my ex climbed into the tree, took out screws and nails, pushed the boards onto the ground, and left them where they fell.) This individual then offered to clear leaves from the roof and clean the gutters. I very happily agreed.
The folks on this thread continue to motivate me. Thank you!
Tiny progress in the basement today. Iâd let a bunch of corrugated boxes pile up for reuse, and I swear they had cardboard babies behind our backs. I started breaking them down and sorting them this afternoon. Many will go to the transfer station, and the remaining ones will be organized and useful.
@swimcatsmom if you know of a trustworthy nursing home/CCRC/assisted living community nearby, maybe ask them for recommendations? The facility my late MIL had applied to used a pair of go-to downsizing professionals. They wouldnât do the actual disposal, but would definitely have steered MIL to someone reliable who could. Your insurance contact will probably be able to hook you right up. Best of luck!
Also, @swimcatsmom: There are services that advertise in my area â JunkLuggers.com and 1800GotJunk.com. They take anything away â for a price, of course.
@HouseChatte lol, box babies.
I took another load to Goodwill. Then 2 hours later, found out that DH and I both like one of the glass tables I just donated. Iâm having donation remorse!
I suggested going to buy it back but he thought that was silly. Maybe Iâll console myself that the leaf design frame was dated and a dust catcher. Plus if the glass broke in transit, it would be pointless.
We bought the set when we first got married so Iâm a little sentimental.
No remorse! Onward and upward!!