I am posting this, after a very long and difficult journey, to give hope to other parents who find themselves desperate for alternatives to the current public education system for high ability kids.
Here is our story:
My daughter started out (k-7) in what is considered one of the top public school systems in the country. One of the things that set our district apart was its extensive offerings for high ability/outlier students. In 3rd grade, my daughter was placed in an extended self-contained classroom with other high ability kids as part of this program that ran approximately 2-3 grades ahead. Everything was great, as this program was a life-line for kids like my daughter⊠until it wasnât. A group of parents started showing up at school board meetings and complaining that the kids in the self-contained class were getting special consideration and that it wasnât fair that they had to explain to their precious little munchkins that they didnât qualify for the program. They didnât want their tax dollars going to support a select group of kids. They thought athletes are okay to fund⊠but intellectual outliersâŠNO WAY! Apparently the district agreed with them because they paid $$,$$$ to a âprofessionalâ to write a report about how the program wasnât inclusive enough and lacking diversity and LGBTQ+ representation. They used the report as a justification for ârestructuring/dismantlingâ. For context, the kids in the program that they surveyed as not being LGBTQ+ representative enough were 10 - 11 years old. Yes, this actually happened. (Ironically, a number of the kids formerly in the program now identify as LGBTQ+, they just didnât recognize it at 10 years oldâŠGo figure.)
So by 6th grade they rolled my daughter and the other outliers into the general classrooms. How did they handle the delta between them and the other kids?⊠they just sat the advanced kids off to the side. Basically said, âwhatever, theyâre already meeting standards so who caresâ. My daughter became despondent and bored out of her mind. I kept having meetings with the school, begging them to grade advance her, but they refused because it âwas against policyâ. The more I complained, the more they pushed back. Then they began gaslighting me, suggesting that my daughterâs attitude towards school was because she couldnât keep up with the work, not because she was bored. Then they suggested we remove her from advanced mathematics because she couldnât write fast enough to finish the exams with the other kids. (She has a 504 for a fine motor issue in her hand that was supposed to include extended time. Yep - They were withholding her accommodations in order to prove a point.)
Ultimately (by 7th grade), the situation became untenable. My daughter couldnât do it anymore. She had missed 26 days of school due to her despondency and was still up to standards. So we made a bold move; we removed her from the public school system and declared her home schooled. She literally just signed up for the ACT - took the test- declared herself âhomeschooledâ- went to the local community college and presented them with her qualifying test scores. The first class she took was Gen Chem 1. Was it a scary jump and did we worry about how she would adjust socially being so young? Yeah, you betcha! But it was the happiest Iâd seen her in years and she adapted beautifully. She just kept going in college courses, eventually transferring into a LAC, completely skipping high school all together. And for everyone who thinks these kids canât get into good college/universitiesâŠ. She was accepted to every school she applied to. Including top tier. Apparently they were impressed by her adaptability and gumption.
Where is she now? My daughter (19yo) is graduating from college summa cum laude with an BS in astrophysics, CS and mathematics and was just accepted to a Top Tier (T10) PhD program in theoretical astrophysics. And, yes, she is happy, healthy, and more well-adjusted than many of her peers who remained in the public school system. Guess she really was bored and pretty good at math after all, huh?
So if you are a parent of a high-ability kid in the public system, there are other alternatives! My daughter is proof. Donât be afraid to forge your own path. We did. Zero regrets.