<p>For the past seven years I have spent every weekend at the barn with DD and her horse. In addition, we feed at a therapeutic riding program early every Sat. morning. </p>
<p>She is going to college in the Fall and two weeks ago I began my search for a new owner for the horse. I just felt I couldn’t afford it and two college tuitions, plus I am not an experienced rider and didn’t want the horse to just sit. </p>
<p>Long story short, we found a wonderful Mom and 21 year old daughter. They love the mare already and are trying to push my April 1st transfer date to March. I am holding firm because DD and I need those three weeks to say our goodbyes.<br>
It’s hard to describe but it’s really the end of an era for me. </p>
<p>I’m going to have to figure out what to do with all my time…I have lots of ideas and lots of good friends but it is a bit bittersweet already and she isn’t leaving till August!</p>
<p>Wow, so poignant, but how wonderful in this time of people abandoning horses that you found a great new home.</p>
<p>I had a lovely horse which I got off the track in the 80s, when I sold him a few years later, I just did not have the time to ride with little kids & working. About 10 years later a teenage girl on the other side of the country tracked me down some how through his history and sent me photos. I cried. It was so sweet of her to do that and without great internet connections in the 90s I have no idea how she accomplished that</p>
<p>ebeeeee - big hugs to you. I know how hard this is! Both of my Ds have ridden for many years and show hunters/jumpers. Until last November I had either owned or leased two horses for the past 5 years! Older D (hs junior) decided to stop riding as she did not have time to devote the way she did when she was younger. She wants to audition for musical theatre next year for college so her focus is voice/acting/dance and getting cast in shows.</p>
<p>We have sold 3 poines and 2 horses over our years of owning them. We still know where all of our old ponies and horses are and we see two of our ponies frequently as the little kids who now have them also show. We get emails and pictures from the owners of both of our horses and they have both gone on to be very successful with their new owners.</p>
<p>When we sold my Ds little hunter three years ago it was a hard day when the truck came to pick him up. It was lightly raining which was a good thing because my D, her trainer and myself were all crying when he left!</p>
<p>When we sold one of the horses I took a clipping from his tail and had a horsehair bracelet made for my D which she still loves to this day. When we sold my younger Ds pony she had for 4 years we also took a tail clipping and she has a specia locket I found with the hair in it that she wears when she shows.</p>
<p>I know that 4 years from now I will be saying goodbye to our horse as we will not be keeping any when 2nd D goes to college. Although they are expensive to keep the horses have taught both of my Ds so much and I think it has been a wonderful experience like no other!</p>
<p>Yup it is definitely bittersweet for us. In this economy, I decided to give her away to the best home I could find. I didn’t want money to be an issue and it is too tough to sell a horse right now.
It has been a wonderful thing for our daughter. To fill in a little more of the story when she was 10 she broke a vertebrae in her back. Many people told me that her back would never be the same but neither of us would hear that or would believe it. As soon as she was better I got her into horseback riding to supplement her ballet. I’m convinced that the riding strengthened her back and it definitely made an enormous difference in her self confidence as she has grown up. Worth every penny we spent over the years…I refuse to add it up because I know it is a BIG number.</p>
<p>ebeeeee - I know what you’re going through too. My D and I had horses since she was 5. At one point, we had 3 and we spent every spare moment with and every spare penny on them. We gave her pony away and she continued to show - hunter - until the summer of '07. She fell at a show and broke two bones in her back. She was lucky to have no permanent injury but it continued to hurt to ride for many months. She was preparing for auditions for college too so she said goodbye to riding. We kept her mare, who had navicular disease, until last February. I was able to find a home for her - not an easy thing with a degenerative condition. Now we are horseless and I haven’t found anything else to fill my time like that did. She still misses the horses and riding terribly, but loves singing too. I will say that there is nothing better for keeping teenage girls out of trouble - every spare minute at the barn, including weekend nights grooming for the shows. She chose horses over boys every time. I don’t miss those 4am mornings on show days. I plan to get involved with a rescue at some point - but I fear that will just break my heart.</p>
<p>cartera45 - you are absolutely right about horses keeping teenaged girls busy! Both of my Ds best group of friends are girls they met at the barn. We have our horse at a wonderful faciltiy right now with a barn manger that lives onsite. There is a clubhouse where the girls can get food, watch TV, use the bathroom or do homework after riding. They can also have sleepovers at the clubhouse!</p>
<p>We have also made some wonderful friends with the parents of girls at the barn. Last winter there was a group of us that went to Tucson for a week for the girls to show. We shared a large, beautiful adobe house (18 people) during that trip and had a wonderful time. The girls were very successful showing that week and we had crazy weather! Wind, rain, snow then sunny! We cooked dinners with lots of wine every night at the house and stayed up late playing scrabble and Mexican train dominos. The parents were worried that the 8 girls would be up too late since they were sleeping in the large gameroom, but it was the parents that stayed up until all hours!</p>
<p>My husband enjoys photography and is the official barn photographer. His pictures are much better than the ones the professionals take at the shows. This has been a great way to get him involved when the girls are showing all weekend.</p>
<p>cartera, I spoke with a few people who are interested in rescue in the process of giving this mare up. You really have to be experienced as a trainer/horsewoman to take that on. The woman who is taking DD’s mare has trained Arabs all her life, her last one just died at age 29 and she was there at his birth.<br>
She is very experienced and wants to take on rescue horses in addition to this one. Our mare is very solid on the trail and she wants to trail ride the mare with the rescue horses.</p>
<p>From another perspective…when my daughter was a freshman in high school, we were looking for a 4H horse for her, and word of mouth sent us to someone whose daughter had gone away to college and lost interest in horses…so they were willing to give their “19” yo mare away to a good home. Daughter had a happy 4 years with that mare, and is now a junior in college, riding on the IHSA team, and I still have that now 26 YO mare at home. She is great company (and is incentive for daughter to come home on breaks!) I do not miss the 4H meetings and early morning shows of high school, but do miss the mother/daughter time of grooming for shows. I asked my daughter once how all those girls on the team survived at shows without any show moms, and she said “oh, one of the girls lives only an hour away, her Mom comes to the shows, helps with our hair, and brings us coffee and donuts!” I agree, horses give girls a sense of responsibility and self confidence, and the bond with other riders is pretty strong as well.</p>
<p>ebeeeee - I meant I would like to volunteer at a rescue, but I know I would want to bring them all home. I don’t think I could work at one that takes in the criminal abuse cases, but we have several in our area that just need bodies for feeding, grooming, etc. I have donated a lot of things to several rescues and still have a garage full of stuff to go through. My D is in denial and hasn’t wanted to part with things, but I think Spring Break is going to involve sorting, selling and donating.</p>
<p>When my daughter was in 8th grade, several people mentioned to me that getting a horse can delay the boy crazies by a couple of years. I don’t know if it is true as we didn’t have a “control” test but my daughter got so much out of her 10 years of riding. It is so good to be with other girls that like getting dirty, aren’t afraid to work hard, and love to be outside every day.</p>
<p>We’ve kept her mule for me to ride in lessons. He is younger and a more “fun” ride and I am learning new skills and gaining confidence. My sister and younger daughter ride the old dependable one. We have nice class of about 6 women at varying levels and it has been a great thing to do.</p>
<p>My youngest is the horse lover in our family. She is in 9th grade and shows no sign of giving the sport up. She spends every afternoon and many Sat’s at the barn. We have only leased but my D would love to have her “own” horse. It is an extremely expensive EC but rewarding. My D rides at a barn that the girls do everything. No grooms. She loves jumping but also likes to trail ride. We have many miles of trails plus she can get down to the beach for an ocean ride. The past two years she has also took up fox hunting.
My H does not get it. He complains about the cost. He would love for her to give up the jumping and just trail ride. To try to explain it to him she told him it would be like him only being able to bump and pepper the volleyball but never play a game with a net.
One sadness I have is that my D has decided to give up her other sports and only ride. It is pretty hard to play a high school sport and also ride 5 afternoons a week.
My D gets sad each time she gives up a horse. She would bring them all home to live out their retirement in our yard.
Come to think of it my inlaws have several older horses in their pastures that at one time belonged to my SIL.
Cartera- let us know when and if your D decides to sell any items.</p>
<p>mom60 - my D didn’t have time for any other sports either. However, riding is a wonderful sport and I always made sure family and friends understood what kind of shape you have to be in to do it well. I have been riding, on and off, since I was 10 and I was always in the best shape of my life when I rode. Jumping requires balance and strength and is wonderful core training - abs will get rock hard when done regularly. My D showed at the county level only, but living in horse country, it is very competitive, with lots of A Circuit riders showing there. Had she not been hurt and unable to ride for so long, I’m not sure she would have given it up. She considered going to school locally and living at home so she could keep a horse. The barn at which we boarded was very low key and no one had a groom. The kids did everything. We cleaned our own stalls on Sunday and she and I fed and watered all the horses one Sunday a month so we were always working hard.</p>
<p>cartera sounds like our barn. My D also only shows at the county level. The county shows are expensive enough. My D is always defending horseback riding as a “real” sport. My D has a super strong core plus strong legs.
This riding “thing” has become quite the focal point when we discuss the future and college with my D. She is already saying she is staying in town for the first 2 yrs and going to the community college so she can continue to train and show. Plus her trainer has already told her she could work for her giving lessons to the the little girls. I am constantly stressing that things can change in 4 yrs and the best course of action is to do well in school and have options.</p>
<p>That horse bug is really strong. I was born with it and have taken breaks over the years, but it never goes away. I rode western growing up, but when I moved to Maryland, I decided to take lessons again and the first time I ever sat in an English saddle, the trainer had me pop over a little cross rail. Then I went back to western and trail riding only and that is what my D did too until she was about 11 and she took her first jump over a creek - and she was hooked. The only thing that has ever rivaled it is singing, and it helps that she has that. Our best vacations were going to Dude ranches in North Carolina and Tucson and trail riding all week.</p>