<p>I’m flipping through Newsweek and I come across an article about the rise in babies born out of wedlock in the U.S. No, not to teenage girls who flubbed birth control, but to mature career women who have given up on marriage, and are making a conscience choice to take on the role of provider and caretaker alone through adoption or with the help of sperm donors. According to Newsweek, unwed births among 30- to 44-year-olds are up 17 percent since 1991; among those 25 to 29, they’re up 30 percent (while in '05 teen pregnancies fell to their lowest levels in 65 years). Some moms aren’t actually going it alone, they’re cohabiting, at least for a while. </p>
<p>Sociologists say marriage “may be on the decline precisely because it has become so idealized” (Newsweek) Now that women have closed the higher education gap and are entering the professions at increasing rates, marriage is no longer seen as a financial arrangement or even necessary in order to fulfill one’s biological role. And, as taboos about babies out of wedlock and sexuality have been further stripped from our culture, women do not feel the need to be in a traditional marriage in order to find sexual fulfillment. The 30-something American woman of today wants more than a breadmaker, she wants good physique, steamy romance, and self-sufficiency out of a spouse. </p>
<p>Two weeks ago the New York Times Sunday magazine edition featured a lengthy story on gay couples who choose to start families, which is also on the rise. </p>
<p>From what I have ascertained, both of these arrangement-types are carefully planned, maybe more so than within the traditional marriage. Single women who take on children are often financially secure and self-sufficient. Gay couples often draw up lengthy contracts, specifying the roles of each parent in the raising of a child. </p>
<p>I thought this was interesting. It means the next generation may grow up in a totally different world than we did. I’m not sure if this is all such a good thing. I find it hard to see myself unmarried, although I do want a career. I understand marriage does not guarantee stability, half of all marriages end in divorce. Experts are expressing concern, Stephanie Coontz, a history and family-studies professor at the Evergreen State College said “When you compare the child of a stable single mother with a child whose parents got married and later divorced, the child with the stable family may do better.” </p>
<p>The Bush administration apparently sees something wrong with all this as it is spending $500 million on a Healthy Marriage Initiative, including anger and stress management, premarital assessments, conflict resolution and communications skills. </p>
<p>…what do you think?</p>