<p>Dear fellow posters,</p>
<p>So much of what we are doing as we seek to guide our offspring in this maze of college applications seems so serious, often critical, yet I am finding some golden moments with my son, who refuses to get too worked up about it. He is applying to seven schools, from toughest reaches to reasonable safeties, and has decided to do it all regular decision. I nudge him along, nibbling little pieces of the application pie at a time, and I sense some things are actually getting done. He is in charge of all of it except the organization part (I got him a box with hanging files to sort it all and keep things separated. Did the same for my daughter, and it kept us all out of the crazy house.) In any case, there have been these occasional sweet moments of insight he is experiencing as he makes important decisions, and there has been great bonding over such issues as whose address should go where (his dad and I are divorced) and who do we know who we can put in the “relatives” spaces (usually no one,) in any case, maybe it is because my son is about to go out into this great unknown, I am finding real poignancy in the times we sit down with something as innocuous as a pre-data sheet. Anyone else, or am I just a sentimental old ma?</p>
<p>I know what you mean, S is almost half done with applications (7 schools also) and is making decisions for himself and yet taking advice from us, too. For instance, I’ve been nudging him to use Adobe Professional software to do his common application forms because his printing is, well, let’s say atrocious is a good word for it and the online version I’ve heard sometimes truncates without you knowing it. But today, he said, “I really think I want to write them by hand to give them a personal touch.” I said, well, okay… and suggested he print out a practice form and fill it out first to see if it looks readable. This is from a kid who hates to write by hand, started typing on the computer at age 5! So, yeah, he’s thinking things through on his own and gathering control of this process bit by bit. </p>
<p>Just a little while ago, we got back from getting our Christmas tree. We let S pick it out, we just stood around and watched. It could be the last time he gets to participate in this part of the family tradition because he will be far away at college, so we gave him the reins. I couldn’t help but think about all the times past getting our tree when he was a little guy in overalls wheezing through the tree lot. Now he’s 6 foot 1 with no asthma and a good eye for fresh Oregon firs. </p>
<p>Poignant is a good word, Momofthree. And the application process is bittersweet. I’m so excited about the opportunities he has and yet with every step completed, it’s one more step out the door. It takes a strong parent to not get in the way, I think. I find myself with a lump in my throat at the most unexpected times, like when I hint to him the 3rd season of the West Wing is coming to our house for Christmas (for the past two years we have sat around like tv gluttons between Christmas and New Years, the two of us and just gorged on West Wing episodes off the dvd), and then remember that next fall, I’ll be watching it alone on Wednesday nights…</p>
<p>On a practical note; it is a GOOD idea to type the common app. (DD didn’t have any problems with truncation on the online form last year.) The adcoms only have a short time to read the apps, they are tired, they have read thousands of them - trying to read atrocious handwriting is not going to make them feel particularly friendly towards your son. This is a good place to encourage him to type. JMHO.</p>
<p>And Momofthree. I also felt poignancy last year when debating colleges (endlessly) with my daughter. Now she is off at school for her freshman year, and, although we miss her, we are doing fine. College has LOTS of holidays and long breaks, cell phones and email are handy to keep in touch, and she doesn’t seem so far away after all. Enjoy the college app process. It really can be an exciting and rewarding time together.</p>