The last essay I will ever ask you to grade

<p>Tomorrow is the last time I am taking the SAT I and this is the last essay that I have written in preparation for it. I took it off a past paper and wrote the answer on paper within the 25 minute time limit (finished in 22 minutes). I ran out of paper and thus my conclusion was a little abrupt but I think I did well. What do you guys think of the essay? There may be some errors in spelling and such because I copied it from paper to computer in about 4 minutes without ever looking at my computer screen. It comes out to around 470 words. Here it is:</p>

<p>Do people learn who they are only when they are forced into action?</p>

<p>When one is forced into action, one realizes what he would really do if he weren’t forced and thus determines his or her own character and identity. Through such situations, which give people no choice, do people learn about themselves and their inner desires.</p>

<p>Gandhi perfectly exemplifies this through the fact that he was a rich, young Indian in South Africa and was living a comfortable life as a successful lawyer. He was aware of the racism that Indians were subjected to in south Africa as well as the trickery and manipulation taking place back home in India but he didn’t take a stand. He had become a lawyer to tackle such situations but he wasn’t able to do so until he too was at the core of the racism during a rip on the train. During his travel in first class he was subjected to racism as well and he decided that it was enough. From that point onwards he was at the forefront of abrogating racism in south Africa before giving everything away in India and leading his infamous non-violence marches that played such a significant role in the independence of India. Without being forced into action, Gandhi, most probably, would have continued his life without making the irreplacable changes that he did and he wouldn’t have discovered that he truly was the peacemaker that he had dreamt of being.</p>

<p>My grandmother too, though not on such a large scale, learnt about her inner self when she took a stand against the corrupted Indian system 4 years ago. When my mother was nine, my grandmother fell off the motorcycle she was traveling on with my grandfather. Because the road was full of holes and had not been properly managed she came close to the brink of death. The money that was supposed to be used to fix the road was going instead, into the minister’s pockets, nevertheless she decided not to fight to prevent other young women from endangering their lives. Then, in 2006, my grandmother’s daughter and my cousin were killed in a tragic car accident when a drunk police officer drove straight into their car. The officer, who was known to have ties in the government, escaped indictment and my grandmother decided she could not hold back her pent up feelings of hatred and anger at the judicial system. She fought long and hard for justice and eventually the officer and his corrupt associates were punished. She too realized that within her was a burning fire of courage and willpower, not the cowardice that she thought she was filled with.</p>

<p>Both my grandmother and Gandhi accentuate how being forced to do something, not necessarily physically, can leave no choice but to take action and learn about your true self.</p>

<p>Critiques and scores? They are all appreciated!</p>

<p>9/12.</p>

<p>Gandhi was not FORCED into becoming an advocate of passive resistance against the British. Many Indians were subjected to racism abroad but not one of them chose to come back to India in order to revolt against the British. They had a choice of continuing their prosperous lifestyle abroad.
The Gandhi example was not very convincing, I guess you would do better with an example of champaran or kheda satyagraha. Champaran</a> and Kheda Satyagraha - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia</p>

<p>Some of the examples are slightly made up. From what I know the people who read it have 2 minutes per paper and thus do not have the time to verify the information. Apparently, they will just accept the information the way it is unless it is blazingly wrong - like saying Barack Obama spent 2 years in Auschwitz or something.</p>

<p>It's better to give more convincing and legitimate examples that to give non-convincing examples and examples of debatable legitimacy.</p>