It really isn’t a huge deal, we are talking hgtv…just curious why the guy gets his own personal space for hobbies and the woman always giggles and "gets"the kitchen or laundry room and it’s all good. We have a big house with a finished basement, but it certainly isn’t hubby’s alone.
Well, fair is fair if we are going to criticize. 9 times out of 10, when a couple looks at a master bedroom, the wife says something along the lines of “this closet is MINE and you can have the one in the spare bedroom.” Why does she get the whole closet and HE has to run back and forth to the other bedroom? She could easily store off season clothes in the other bedroom and allow him to have his own clothes in THEIR closet.
I believe that in the case of the man cave, women are often on board so that they don’t have to be subjected to their husbands’ television tastes.
Glad I hadn’t just taken a big gulp of coffee when I read that! 
Fair enough, there is always the conversation about the closets. And if I hear one more person with no budget demand granite counters or think paint colors and carpet are insurmountable problems…I watch this show at night in bed, I think it’s time to stop.
We have a kid cave. Okay, many call it a finished basement, but still, it’s an area where our kids can entertain their friends. It is a space (see what I did there?) that may be used by any member of the family, and the decor is similar to what we have in the rest of the house.
Oh, I guess I don’t watch HGTV so I don’t understand how they’re presenting it.
I am a fan of HGTV. I imagine they look at many houses, but present as though it is a choice of 3. I can see why realtors don’t like working with first time buyers, who have no vision about cosmetic changes, or removing a wall.
In my current house I had an extra bedroom, which became son’s cave. His Nintendo set went there. The closet was filled with toys and art/school supplies. The rest of the house stayed neat. It was a pleasure for both of us.
Since most of my friends are empty nesters, the woman move their craft projects into a bedroom.
Can I just say, I hate the term “man cave”.
I don’t think this is much different than the HGTV women who demand the largest closet. And delegate the puny closet to the guy.
Personally, HATE the term “man cave”.
But practically, I don’t have a problem with it. I don’t feel like most men are saying, “my domain! Don’t come in!” - maybe it’s just a space that they can call their own for rules and boundaries - in decorating, eating snacks, loudnessof the tv, furniture choice - stuff like that. I think that’s ok.
I too am someone who enjoys my own space and alone time. Would NEVER want an open kitchen concept - I like doing my cooking without involving the entire household! I like having various “space” I can retreat to - with or without other people in it.
And in reference to tv, H and I are TOTALLY on different pages. Now I don’t watch much tv, but when I do, it’s almost always in one room while he is in another - with his very own flipper. 
I’ve read that the new thing for women is the “She Shed” in the backyard.
^^^But why does she have to go outside? Is it heated? LOL
Not for me. Please don’t send me to the outhouse!
Aside from what was already said, I think it bears noting that in most homes (of which I am aware) the woman tends to have completely free reign in terms of decorating. The man cave is the one place in the house where we guys get to keep things looking in a manner which we enjoy. Don’t get me wrong, we are happy to let the women in our lives have the space looking in a manner they enjoy. For those of us with a ‘cave’ it is typically a tiny fraction of the space for our wives. (I have many friends who do not even get a closet in the master because their wives took the entire master closet)
Just to be clear. I do all of the cooking and at least my share of the cleaning. I used to do the laundry when the tv and the laundry facilities were co-located. Now my wife handles the laundry as the space is more central…and she did not think my folding technique was up to snuff.
I would also say that the man cave only exists when it is prudent to do so given your living circumstances. In the old days, it was called a shop or men were relegated to the garage.
Wow, it wasn’t that way in my home!
“It was pretty common back when people our age were kids to have basements dedicated to hobbies, so they were man or woman caves, really. This isn’t new other than there are entire industries dedicated to decorating them.”
I agree. Men had shop rooms - we still have one with all kinds of tools, table saw, etc. I don’t go in there except to grab a screwdriver that my spouse requests! Growing up, I knew people with darkrooms because they were into photography. Some women had small sewing rooms. I myself have a home office (though H does keep some reference materials stored there).
I don’t see much new about this.
…
Well, my H has pretty much taken over most of the yard, closets in the carport, and the storage shed in the yard. He has also taken over the table in the family room and a good portion of the counter in our bedroom, as well as a significant portion of the kitchen. He grumbles at me that I don’t put things away because there is no where for me to put things with him taking all the available storage spots. We still manage pretty well, sharing our small closet and leaving the kids rooms mostly intact (tho they live in different states thousands of miles away, but do come to visit). It works OK for us, most of the time. 
I think some women put up with a man having a “man cave” so that they (the woman) can have at least a little access to the remote control for the TV that is elsewhere.
However, I agree that the idea that one spouse should get some large space (not for work/office) for him/herself is rather selfish if it’s really a place to escape family responsibilities and family interactions.
I think the idea of a man-cave just perpetuates this idea that “men need to relax after work,” while women are expected to continue working and child-rearing 24/7.
How can a man “parent” anyone if they’ve escaped to their man-cave so that they don’t have to be bothered or interrupted by what is going on in the household???
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when a couple looks at a master bedroom, the wife says something along the lines of "this closet is MINE and you can have the one in the spare bedroom." Why does she get the whole closet and HE has to run back and forth to the other bedroom?
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lol…I haven’t seen this. I have seen instances where there are two closets in the master BR, and the woman will say, “the bigger one is mine,” but…hey…we all know that most wives have more clothes/shoes/accessories/purses/etc than their H’s do. My H probably has 6 pairs of shoes, at most. I probably have 60, at least.
Not everyone with a “man cave” has kids yet, and some have already raised their kids.
Some men escape to the man cave after the kids have gone to bed. Some women escape to their bedroom with a good book or the bathtub for a long soak.
Not everyone with a man cave neglects their families.
When we were raising kids, there was no man cave, but DH did have a big office. He often worked late in the evening after we put the kids to bed. No complaints from me. It was an improvement on the days when he would go to his office until late and I worried about him running into some burglars or falling asleep in the car on the way home.
Now that the kids are gone, we do have a room called the “man cave,” but DH doesn’t really watch TV in there unless I’m also watching something with him. D2 uses it more than we do when she is home and has friends over because the TV and sound system is so good.
Our TV is in the living room - there’s only one. Those these days you can pretty much watch anything you really, really want to watch on your computer. Our basement is more of a woman cave - I took out the bar (all on my own since DH’s back was acting up the week I decided it had to go) and when we put an addition on the house the idea was always to put some exercise equipment for me down there. DH goes to the gym during the week, but I have a hard time justifying the extra 20 minutes driving time and the mornings when he goes is always when contractors and clients call. Right now I’m sharing it with the boomerang kid, but I expect he’ll be gone soon.