The size of the engagement ring. Does it matter?

Parent Cafe
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<p>Seahorse: I have thought about taking it over to the Holocaust museum. But I think that this ring was sent to me to keep it safe. Someone will wear it…someday. And if they don’t…I may donate it. </p>

<p>Yes, I am so very lucky that my kids are here or nearby. We don’t have a full house tonight…but there are kids in my breakfast room eating dinner and watching the game. I love this.</p>

<p>I love jewelry. I am one of “those” people who has a jeweler on speed dial. (Kidding about that…but I’m not far off). If someone doesn’t like jewelry, fine. But I had the duty of helping my son find the ring. I went to several stores, saw lots of jewels…but he did the final selection. And just saying…to each their own…one person’s gaudy is another’s is the other person’s upgrade diamond.</p>

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<p>ellebud, could you post a picture of your favorites? </p>

<p>I’ve seen a jeweler a fewtimes recently, but to replace a stone, restring a necklace, replace watch battery. I stare at the white gold bracelets with desire.</p>

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<p>Congrats to OP on the engagement!!! Such an exciting time!!!</p>

<p>Someone up-thread said we need more weddings around here, so let me add to the fun:</p>

<p>My D’s BF has purchased a ring and recently e-mailed all the family to tell us of his plans to propose (and he also had the “talk” with DH ----we loved that, though DH said he was not sure who was more nervous for that “talk”). They went ring shopping together and she knows he ordered the ring, though she does not know when/how he plans to propose. He e-mailed us so that we could plan a way to surprise her with a celebration immediately after he proposes. Also, he is flying her best friend/future maid of honor in to town so she can share in the celebration! :slight_smile: </p>

<p>We are all beyond excited to welcome this young man into our family. Fun stuff!!</p>

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<p>Congratulations. This is very exciting.</p>

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<p>Congratulations! </p>

<p>There really are a lot of weddings.</p>

<p>I love jewelry. I’m not a shallow person, but I love jewelry in a kind of unreasonable way, to be honest. I’m the same way about certain artists.</p>

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<p>I love to look at jewelry, I often walk up and down the streets in the 47th Street area just to look at the sparklies in the windows. I don’t particularly like to wear it, though, and am just as happy with the fake sparklies that I do have. My husband bought me an add-a-bead necklace for our 25th. I added all the beads and dangles that I want. But then it was too heavy and uncomfortable to wear, so I never do. But I do look at it and move the beads around from time to time.</p>

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<p>Ellebud, giving the candleholders to your future DIL was such a lovely thing to do. I am sure that you will have a wonderful family life together.</p>

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<p>I work for a jeweler and would like to weigh in on the subject of offering a family heirloom as an engagement ring. As far as I have read, the OP has not brought the ring in to be evaluated by a gemologist to verify that (1) is it in fact a diamond, (2) what is the actual condition of the stone and the mounting, and (3) what is the approximate current value of the stone.</p>

<p>A jeweler should be able to quickly diamond test the stone, to loupe the stone and mounting looking for chips, cracks, & inclusions on the stone and for broken prongs, cracks, and previous repairs to the mounting, and to measure the stone to roughly estimate the carat weight. Do this before passing the stone to the son. This stone could be an old mine cut diamond with a present value that is significantly less than a brilliant or ideal cut stone of similar carat weight, clarity, and color. The original stone could also have been lost and replaced with a “faux” by its original owner and never revealed to the rest of the family—yes, we have seen this happen.</p>

<p>I would seriously consider remounting the stone. Mountings do wear, prongs break, stones get lost. Intricate filigree antique-style mountings can be difficult to repair and/or expensive to restore. We recommend a 4 prong Tiffany style mounting in 14K white gold to men who don’t have a clue to what their intended might want. It is not expensive and it allows the stone to show at its best and evoke that “wow” emotion.</p>

<p>Another subject discussed was the use of semi-precious stones as an alternative to a diamond for an engagement ring. Sapphire & Ruby, maybe. Emerald, peridot, or other semi-precious, NO—just don’t. Emeralds will crack, peridot will crumble. Sapphires and rubies will chip, scratch, and show signs of wear. You need to know the hardness of the stone you are considering. While it is true that a diamond can break if it is hit in just the right spot, it is a very rare occurrence. For every sapphire ring engagement ring I’ve seen come through our store for repair, I would say that 1 out of 3 is chipped. When you wear a ring everyday, it should be able to withstand the constant abuse that we subject it to.</p>

<p>I do have an opinion on the appropriate size, but that is subjective  Even though they may be teachers…consider are they a young couple or a bit older and further along in their careers, what size do her sisters, sisters-in-laws, colleagues, friends, etc have? A stone in the ¾ to 1 carat range may not be out of reach and is a respectable size. If someone were to purchase or use a stone of ½ carat of less, I would like to see it set in a diamond semi-mount which would enhance the overall “substance” of the ring. That is my opinion, with the disclaimer that I live in the suburban Northeast where size matters in certain communities. Use Blue Nile for price comps…I found that they were close to wholesale pricing and then work with a jeweler who brokers stones from a supplier. That way you have the ability to negotiate, and choose a stone in your desired size/color/clarity range.</p>

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<p>OR we can get the engagement ring that we really want and deal with any breaks if we have to =). </p>

<p>My grandma has a lot of sapphire and emerald jewelry. She wore it for over 40 years and through multiple different transcontinental moves. Still it tip top shape :).</p>

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<p>My Tiffany trade is working out nicely. I’m hoping that this thread can pay for a piece of jewelry.</p>

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<p>I have an emerald and diamond ring that I wore on a daily basis for years. The emerald is in a bezel setting so it is protected more than it would be in other types of settings.</p>

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<p>Just sayin…we make our customers sign off on emerald repairs that we are not responsible for loss or damage. An emerald cannot withstand heat, and in order to size or resize a ring a goldsmith must apply high heat in order to solder. The alternative is unmount the stone or stones which is extremely costly. Rings that need frequent repairs end up costing alot more than the initial investment or end up in a jewelry box sitting unworn for fear of loss. If you want to actually wear a piece every single day and not worry about losing your stone, then you should be fully aware of the fact that certain stones are not suitable for everyday wear. Emeralds, pearls, opals, citrine, & periodot to name a few.</p>

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<p>How about Jade?</p>

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<p>Necklaces and earrings are fine for some of the less hardy stones, because they are worn less frequently and are not subject to the same stresses that rings and bracelets endure. Think about your daily activities. Reaching into a washing machine or dryer and hitting your hand on the way in. Gardening. Chlorine from laundry, detergents, or the the swimming pool. You have to be disciplined and always be thinking about removing your rings. I am not that disciplined, and will only remove my rings when gardening…and I should know better. Buyer should be fully apprised and aware.</p>

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<p>And my final thought on engagement rings. Never propose to a girl on a boat, beach, pier, rock jetty, near water or over water. Or by hiding the stone in food or drink. Stupidest thing ever. If you do, get the stone appraised and insured before the proposal.</p>

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<p>Yes, the jeweler who designed my ring gave me all the warnings. I was very careful with it for a while, but then was less and less so. I’m sure I was just lucky that it wasn’t damaged. </p>

<p>I also have a fire opal that is in a protected setting and I know I have to be careful with that too.</p>

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<p>Someone I knew proposed to his girlfriend in Bermuda. They went diving and he pretended he found something in a shell, when she opened it there was the engagement ring. I thought it was kind of risky when he told me.</p>

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<p>I do all the laundry so my wife doesn’t have to worry about that.</p>

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<p>I proposed at the Boston College reservoir. Didn’t have any problems.</p>

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<p>We were in Australia many years ago and saw an Opal exhibit. We saw some very interesting pieces. It can be fun looking at this stuff.</p>

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<p>Fsu, thank you for very informative posts! </p>

<p>Here is a horror proposal story involving a ring and a large body of water:</p>

<p>[Marriage</a> Proposal Horror Story: Ring, Cops, Machine Guns, Handcuffs - ABC News](<a href=“Marriage Proposal Saga: a Ring, Cops, Machine Guns, Handcuffs and a Yes - ABC News”>Marriage Proposal Saga: a Ring, Cops, Machine Guns, Handcuffs and a Yes - ABC News)</p>

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<p>My cousin proposed while skydiving. With ring and all. Talk about risky. Turned out fine but I’m pretty sure his now-wife was ready to kill him for trying to pull off something like that. But he’s a stuntman so she knew what she was getting into with him lol.</p>