<p>MomORama - I understand those “regrets”, however…when it’s right, it’s right, and you might as well grab it while you can.</p>
<p>I’m so glad I nudged my son to apply EDII to his favorite back in December when he was filling out apps to schools I knew he’d never attend even if he got in. He’s been able to really enjoy this last semester in high school - kept grades up without the stress of uncertainty, and taken on extra committments to programs he’s involved with just for the fun of it. I’ve never seen him more calm and productive. Even though he had to withdraw from his other schools, there was satisfaction in the closure.
I think he inherited my “let’s get on with it” personality.
(Married my hubby at 20, for the same reasons… worked out great! )</p>
<p>What a great thread. I wish I’d seen this four years ago (son just finished UCLA) and then two years ago. I remember when my son was sending in his cards and saying his “no thank yous”. He was fine and he felt great about his decision, but I, with the perspective of age, realized that this was the first real moment in his life that the path was becoming narrower and that was a new feeling as a parent. Up until the moment he decided where to go, the possibilities were wide but once he chose a school I felt like his life began a funneling process. Each step he would take from there on out would close other doors. Now that he is finished with school, it’s clear that his adult friends are chosen – he has a great set of friends but it’s a different set than if he had gone elsewhere. He wants to live in L.A. (which works out great for me since we live here) whereas if he had gone elsewhere his life might have taken a different path. My daugher goes to school on the east coast. Part of her thinking when she chose her school over a CA school was the idea of the “doors”. Would there ever be another time in her life where it would be so easy to move somewhere else? I think you are all wise to say these good-byes. There will be a lot of good-byes in the next several months.</p>
<p>More doors closing…not always pleasant or nostalgic…three rejections and two waitlists in rapid succession. A hard evening. </p>
<p>The rejections and one waitlist slid easily off son’s back since he had no real personal investment there. These were last minute additions to his list and, since he never visited the schools, they didn’t seem quite “real”. </p>
<p>The last door is proving more difficult. He just can’t bring himself to close that final door on Brown. The darn thing won’t budge. He spent time on campus one summer, and has frequently listened to tales about my own experiences there. Plus, his stats and interests seemed like a close match both from the point of view of our own family and several so-called “experts” we consulted (including the Brown alumni counselling service). </p>
<p>So, for the moment at least, however conflicted my own feelings, that door remains open an inch or two, and son sits on the waitlist, while I try to get him to concentrate on making a choice from the excellent schools where he was accepted. </p>
<p>Dang…I can deal with open doors and closed doors, but doors that are jammed and won’t budge are driving me a little crazy. Any suggestions or advice?</p>
<p>Door swinging open again. With admission to UChicago, I am in limboland, but happily so. I wasn’t bothered by the rejections, because I didn’t really care (I liked my safeties better than reaches), but Chicago was last and if I hadn’t gotten in my decision would have been much simpler. This introduces an entirely different set of criteria.</p>
<p>I truly don’t think the doors close until the end of April and they aren’t necessarily slammed. I spent this weekend throwing out a pile of college stuff that was still on a bookshelf by the computer…from last year. :)</p>
<p>Congrats on Chicago! What a great school. One of my favorite kids from this area graduated from Chicago and is now in NYC. He loved it and he was a very social guy and a great student.</p>
<p>Cami, we didn’t have to deal with waitlists last year. Sometimes they work for students, they get off. I guess it depends on how important that one is to your son. He has wonderful acceptances. My best.</p>
<p>Thanks, overseas. I’ve spent the past three hours roaming the website and course catalog and reading the requirements for the Core and they sound fantastic. I was daunted by the idea of the core but I am so excited by the sequences…and like, everything. I’m stoked for life, and I wish I could pick my friends who take rejections personally up off of the ground…but they want to be roadkill and until they embrace their paths, well, they’ll be miserable. But I have faith they will come around.</p>
<p>Overseas and TheDad-- even though I would have been fine at the schools I got in before Chicago, the U of C changes things…it’s great to hear that they love it, I’m counting the days until my visit.</p>
<p>Overseas-- Vics is across the street from my old synagogue. We used to go there and get ice cream and sandwiches w/potato chips as a class “field trip.” If you come back to Sacramento, the best stuff in town is Madison Station Frozen Yogurt. They have oreo flavored stuff that they make themselves…</p>
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