The worst career advice parents can give to their kids

Parent Cafe
1

<p>I saw this on yahoo earlier, pretty interesting read. </p>

<p>For many young people today, the most trusted source of career advice is their parents. Unfortunately, a lot of parents are giving a lot of misguided advice to their kids.</p>

<p>Today’s workplace is very different from the one baby boomers navigated. But often they don’t realize that, and think the “classic” advice still applies. It doesn’t. Here are the five worst pieces of advice that parents dole out:</p>

<li>Get a graduate degree</li>
</ol>

<p>It used to be that people went to graduate school as a surefire way to achieve the American Dream. Today, graduate school generally makes young people less employable, not more employable.</p>

<p>For example, people who get a graduate degree in the humanities have little chance of getting a tenured teaching job.</p>

<p>And when it comes to an MBA, the value of the degree plummets if it’s not from a top school, even though the cost of the degree continues to skyrocket. So instead of opening doors for you, the degree in many ways forces you to settle for a job that pays well enough to pay back your student loans.</p>

<p>Law school results in one of the few graduate degrees that can make you more employable. Unfortunately, it makes you more employable in a profession in which people are unhappy. Law school rewards perfectionism, while law practice rewards good sales skills.</p>

<p>This dichotomy, combined with the reality that practicing law isn’t all that glamorous, means that law school should be something you do only if you’re driven to – it’s not the safety net indecisive career seekers wish it was.</p>

<li>Don’t job hop</li>
</ol>

<p>The advice parents give about job hopping comes from the days when human resources people were in charge of job interviews, and hiring managers ruled the world. But today, job hopping is standard. Most people will have eight jobs before they turn 30, and that’s a good thing.</p>

<p>Young candidates these days have more power than interviewers because there’s a shortage of people to fill entry-level jobs. Unemployment among the college educated is less than 2 percent, young people routinely have more than one job offer, and 70 percent of hiring managers say they feel like they need to convince candidates to take their jobs. Clearly, this is a time when young people are in charge.</p>

<p>Job hoppers are bad for companies because high turnover is expensive, but switching jobs a lot is very good for employees. It builds skills faster, constructs a network more effectively, and helps you figure out what you like and what you don’t like. Most important, regularly switching jobs helps you maintain passion in your career – which, in the end, benefits companies as much as it benefits the passionate workers cycling through them.</p>

<li>Don’t ask about time off until you have the job</li>
</ol>

<p>Everyone has a personal life that exists separately from their job. You can’t schedule your cousin’s bar mitzvah around a product launch, and you can’t clear your calendar before you take a new job.</p>

<p>So when you’re figuring out which job to take, be upfront about what sort of time you expect to be taking for yourself. If you want Tuesdays off for kickboxing class, then say so. If you have a vacation planned for two weeks after the proposed start date, then say that. Some jobs have unmovable start dates, and sometimes your personal life will preclude taking a job.</p>

<p>That’s OK. Why bother with the absurd job-interview song-and-dance where you pretend that your personal life doesn’t matter, and that only getting the job matters? You wouldn’t want to work for anyone who had that attitude, so why pretend to have it yourself?</p>

<li>Don’t have gaps in your r</li>
</ol>

2

<p>I hire people as part of my job. Number 1 and 3 above strike me as baloney. The traditional advice is right on target from my perspective. And 2 may not be an absolute, but it’s still pretty darned good advice. I just bounced an apparent job hopper off the short list of a position for which I was hiring.</p>

3

<p>I agree with the part about the MBA. My sister-in-law got a degree in Health Care Management; when she couldn’t find a full-time job right out of school she went back and got her MBA. Turns out it made her LESS employable. Jobs that required an MBA also wanted experience, which she didn’t have. And no one would hire her for an entry-level job, because with an MBA they figured she’d demand too high of a salary.</p>

4

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<p>I’d say it depends on the field. In my field (scientific research), people without doctorates can certainly get jobs. But at most places the highest you can rise without one is to be some Ph.D.'s or M.D.'s trusted assistant. If you want to be the boss yourself someday you need the doctorate. It was true back an my day and it’s still true. That’s why with only a B.S. I quit work after six years and went back to school and earned my Ph.D. I’ve never regretted it.</p>

5

<p>I think it says job hopping is good, not the other way around.</p>

6

<p>Job hopping reinforces resourcefulness. However, you don’t want to tell your employer you are job shopping or it’s off to the dirt assignment with you!</p>

<p>Another bad career advice from parents is to tell kids what career to pursue!</p>

7

<p>I totally support job hopping. I intentionally do not consider candidates who have been with one organization for four, five years or longer, UNLESS they have been promoted or have measurably grown at a faster rate than might be expected at that organization. I like to see people who are interested in exploring new ground and taking on risks. Of course, I want to keep them too, but, I don’t want an employee to stay who is just doing so because they need the stability of the income. </p>

<p>I don’t think parents should be giving career advice unless asked, or, unless there is a valid reason to warn someone away from a very bad choice.</p>

8

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<p>This is also another situation where it depends. It is now common practice that students have some work experience under the belt before pursuing a MBA (at many top schools w/e is a requirement or strongly preferred for admissions into a MBA program). </p>

<p>It also depends on where you work because it is not unusual for large corporations, to pick up all or part of the cost of your MBA (my employer picked up the tab for 2 master’s programs as both were work related). At many companies EMBAs for those in senior management (or going up the ranks to senior management) are fully paid for by the corporation. Many of the classes take place late in the afternoon, evenings and some weekends (with on line courses becoming increasingly popular) so it is not unusual to be in class with people who have worked all day.</p>

9

<p>Plastics. (!)</p>

10

<p>Move back in with your parents? Say what? </p>

<p>Not on your life, kiddo. I know exactly where that rent ‘savings’ would go–into ‘entertainment’. </p>

<p>Nope. </p>

<p>I’ve given them the best possible education in childhood–and the best way for them to forge an interesting and adventurous adult life is to run into the obstacles themselves–as terrified about the money as we were. That’s the great thing about money–it can be a great motivator when you don’t have enough to do what you want to do. They’ll live and learn and innovate, as we did. </p>

<p>We’re not the least bit worried about them finding fantastic career opportunities in the global market of 2007. </p>

<p>FWIW, I prefer to work with a team of engineers with a Phd at the helm of each discipline–if I can get it. Why? Because Phd’s tend to be lifetime readers–they keep up with the innovations in the field.</p>

11

<p>I agree, cheers – and I’m on the dirt-poor-recent-college-grad end. :slight_smile: Several of my friends from high school moved back with their parents while they’re attending professional school. I think it’s distinctly odd – I really enjoy being financially independent of my parents, even if I’m just scraping by.</p>

<p>I have trouble believing that 60% of college grads need to move back in with their parents – my fiance and I are living on my (graduate student!) salary this year, and we’ve managed to put a substantial amount in savings along with eating and paying rent and supporting our dependent bunny. It’s all about appropriate money management.</p>

12

<p>At about the time son #2 is a freshman in college, son #1 is supposed to be graduating college, and WashMom and I are moving into either a 3-bedroom condo or a small house. No college-grad kid of mine is moving back in unless they are terminally ill and need our care to stay alive.</p>

<p>EDITED: WashMom says this is really harsh – but she said it while laughing…</p>

13

<p>I’m with gadad. A lot of the article is crap. Traditional 1 , 3 , and 5 are good advice, and 2 and 4 can be. I would never consider hiring an associate who was changing jobs at the rate these folks are saying is average. They are just too hard to train. And while I have no doubt that a year off after college spent backpacking or running with the bulls wouldn’t raise any eyebrows with me at least , the tolerance for long periods of unemployment decreases rapidly with the applicant’s age. Again. Just my opinion.</p>

14

<p>I also found the advice about moving back in with the parents to be inexplicable. One of the things that got my son promoted rather quickly with his first job was his willingness to relocate at the drop of a hat – I think he moved about 7 times in 2 years. He got a tremendous amount of experience and increased responsibility because of that attitude. </p>

<p>My daughter has already moved to her first apartment for her summer internship – even though it is local. (But the commute from our suburban home would be a bear - her apartment is an easy bus ride). She deliberately put in extra hours at her campus jobs in order to raise the money for the deposit for an apartment – I think the desire to live independently and the need for rent is a strong motivator. It is too easy for young people who are living at home to take things easy, since they don’t really need the money and can afford to lose the job. </p>

<p>I am sure there are exceptions, but of the families I now with post-college kids living at home, none of those kids are go-getters or achievers. They seem to drift from one low end job to another, or happily stick for ages with a part-time job with no possibility of advancement. </p>

<p>Living independently from parents is not all that expensive if an apartment is shared with other young people. </p>

<p>Anyway, I thought the article was kind of dumb. Though I have to say that the title is just perfect for the advice it offers – the author really does give “The Worst Career Advice” I could imagine.</p>

15

<p>a question for all of you…i may be guilty of giving dd bad career advice #6…she is completing a one year americorps assignment and is looking for her next job. she is interested in the social service/health care area and intends to go to grad school for her mph in 2008 or 2009. her way of looking for jobs is to use the internet…craigslist, idealist, a few others. i think she should find the organization where she wants to work, id people who work there and start making phone calls. she claims that “that’s not how it’s done anymore. everyone uses the internet.” consequently, she’s e-mailed lots of resumes (i do think her resume and cover letter are good) and has received NO replies. is she right to continue down this path?</p>

16

<p>Graduate school makes people LESS employable?</p>

17

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<p>In my experience – which is significant – the internet has made job-searching much harder. People deluge posters with resumes, I suspected, and as a result those posting jobs give up looking through applications that are sent in. I confirmed this when I went to the other side of the equation and was trying to hire through internet postings. We got deluged with resumes, but none of those who applied (literally none) had appeared to have read some important facts about the position (e.g., the job will require you to relocate across the country, if you are not already on the West Coast). I gave up viewing any of the people who came in through that channel as worthwhile and we ended up hiring someone through personal connections. The internet is a waste of time for job searching, for the most part. People tend to use it to think they are being productive in their job search, when in fact it’s usefulness is very limited.</p>

18

<p>interesting thread … the 2 bad pieces of advice I would add are …</p>

<p>Parents steering kids into careers they (the parents) think the kids would be good at while ignoring the students interests … e.g., parents pushing their kids towards med school while the student doesn’t really like science.</p>

<p>Parents steering 22 year olds away from their dreams and towards practical career choices … e.g., a parent advocating something like … “no one makes it on Broadway so don’t head to NY to try to be a dancer … instead major in accounting because accountants always can find a stable job”. Pre-kids and post-kids are the prime times to chase a dream … hopefully I’ll encourage my kids to chase theirs.</p>

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<p>a reaction to some of the advice above … IT DEPENDS.</p>

<p>For example, the comment on job hopping. In young vibrant industries job hopping is often viewed as a positive especially if each move shows increasing responsibility … for example, I woudl think in the interent world right now there is a ton of job hopping. I work (and hire) in a much more stable and mundane corporate environment and a lot of job hopping is a negative even wmong young candidates … we are looking to hire people who will stay 5-10 year.</p>

19

<p>As a parent considering the possibility of my kids going to grad school, I think right out of college is the best course. The undergrad courses are fresh in your mind and so is the entire schooling process. If it happenes I don’t know what we can contribute, but I do think getting it over with is a good idea.</p>

20

<p>I, like others, think a lot of what’s in that article is ‘baloney’. Getting a graduate degree is very rarely a liability, and the quote about law school rewarding perfectionism and law practice rewarding good sales skills? Very odd comment. </p>

<p>I don’t know many (or any!) businesses, large or small, that would think that someone who has had eight jobs by the time they’re thirty is a good thing. </p>

<p>The time off issue is one of those ‘it depends’ type things. In the business world, in general, insisting on “Tuesdays off” would be a no-go. A two week vacation that’s already booked and paid for? Less likely to be a problem. There are many jobs where there are sacrifices that are necessary surrounding personal life events, e.g., your cousin’s bar mitzvah. Being aware of this going in, if this is the type of job you want, is a good idea.</p>

<p>Gaps in your resume are probably not a problem, if those gaps were for travel or specific non-job-related endeavors. Large unexplained gaps with no employment could be a problem.</p>

<p>Moving back in with your parents is sometimes necessary. I have friends who have had their kids do this for short periods of time. In our city, the costs prohibit many young grads from immediately getting their own apartments without some assistance from their parents. All of these kids are working and saving. Although the two of mine who have graduated so far have not done this, I would never tell them that they couldn’t.</p>