<p>My cousin, in Madrid, is looking to place several middle school students here in the U.S. for a semster/year. I’m thinking that age may be too young to be away from home for such a long time. Plus, I’m just not sure they are mature enough to benefit from the experience. What are your thoughts?</p>
<p>I think it is too young. Maybe a <em>good</em> boarding school, because they are accustomed to dealing with the issues that arise with adolescents away from home. (Avoid the fly-by-night schools, often religiously-affiliated, that will take ANY international student who can pay, often placing them with host families. It is a whole subculture, and usually a rip-off.) </p>
<p>My D did a summer with a family in Italy when she was 13. She enjoyed it and is still in touch with the family. I don’t think her language skills would have been sufficient to handle school work at that point. I don’t think I personally would want to handle another middle schooler for that long. They are emotionally exhausting!</p>
<p>We were approached to host a teen as a foreign exchange student or help with finding a family that would have been happy to do so. After some email conversations, we realized that the mom was actually the teen’s stepmom and what she was really looking for was a break from parenting this kid who apparently had behavior issues. This might be an isolated case, but definitely something to consider when you get such requests. </p>
<p>^^^
That reminds me of parents who sent their kids to residential camp in the summer to be supervised by kids barely out of high school.
But wait theres more!
They also took their kids off their behavior medication, " to give them a break" and didnt tell staff!</p>
<p>Note to parents: Just because you took your child off their meds, is not a reason to answer “no”, when asked if they are on any medication.</p>
<p>:-/ </p>
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<p>My concern would be that they’re not mature enough to speak up for themselves if the experience turns out not to be as anticipated. Even a teenager can find herself at a loss when she lands in a foreign country and finds out she’s expected to be her host family’s full time babysitter. A middle school child who finds him or herself in a difficult situation would likely be utterly unprepared to deal with it.</p>
<p>Think about it: “Mom and Dad just spent $50,000 to send me to the United States for a year, and I’m miserable. I don’t dare tell them . . .”</p>
<p>I meant to say that I went to boarding school in England in 8th and 9th grade, and I absolutely loved it. But my parents were in the country, so I spent vacations with them–actually that was sometimes more difficult than being at school 
– and of course there was no language barrier. Sure, there were rough patches, but nothing that would not be a part of adolescence anyway.</p>
<p>Your family member should spend some time consulting with the experts at the closest office of a reputable exhange organization such as:
<a href=“http://www.afs.org/”>http://www.afs.org/</a>
<a href=“https://www.yfu.org/”>Youth for Understanding - YFU;
<a href=“https://www.rotary.org/en/youth-exchanges”>https://www.rotary.org/en/youth-exchanges</a> </p>
<p>They have been doing student exchanges for many years, and may have workable options available for middle school students.</p>
<p>It really depends on the maturity of the child and the child’s eagerness to go. It’s not for every child.</p>
<p>GMTson2 went to boarding school overseas in middle school starting in 8th grade. He liked it so much he asked to return the next year.</p>
<p>With the language barrier and a culture shock, maybe homesickness and difficulties at school I would expect many children at that age to be young.
Family life, schools and peer groups are very different in Europe even in our age of globalisation. We have hosted kids of 13 to 15 from other countries for a maximum of three weeks and that is also the longest stay I would accept. What is the hurry? When they are older, more Independent and speak good English they will benefit a lot more.
Of course, there are some exceptions.
Even many teenagers who go abroad for a year have trouble adjusting to new schools and families and end up having to transfer to second or even third hosts. Nobody likes to talk about it, but some kids ar so unhappy that they go home early. At the age of 13 or 14 that can be a traumatic situation.</p>
<p>An AFS volunteer told me 30% of placements are disrupted and that’s with high school students. </p>
<p>Maybe boarding schools are different. At least they have a track record in dealing with kids this age. </p>
<p>Anyone know anything about CompassUSA? We were asked to host a Chinese student (age 13- 17) for ten days. I could handle that time period. Years ago, we hosted a girl that didn’t fit in her first host home. Well, she didn’t fit well in ours either. So I guess I am somewhat wary now but I still like the idea. The thing is we don’t have children at home now and I am not sure how well it would work.</p>
<p>It may be more difficult without kids at home cause you don’t have a natural avenue into school events and activities.</p>