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<p>There is a difference between “helping out” and being a substitute parent, which is what it seems like these kids are- parents to their younger siblings, not “helpers”.</p>
<p>Yes, 20 people are the tipping point. You folks are just making silly statements now. And whatever the “weirdness” of their home-schooling, they all seem to speak well and can carry on conversations as well as any high school grads I have sen and better than most. Mostly I see people just annoyed at their success and making things up without a shred of proof.</p>
<p>Oh ho, I can see you have no familiarity with the show, mom2. Stop drinking the Duggar Kool Aid! The kids have been home schooled in a chaotic environment by a mother who is completely unqualified for the task. Four of the kids are over 18–none of them attend college or any other post-high school educational program, nor will they be allowed, much less encouraged, to do so. The talk of certified midwifery or music education is for the benefit of the TV audience–none of the girls has the time to become educated or otherwise learn any workplace skill besides child care because all they do is look after the babies, do housework and prepare to be “courted” by whatever Quiverfull family offspring is chosen for them. Some of the kids do seem high spirited and bright–we can only hope that they smarten up enough to get out from under the control of the parents and find more out of life than being a cog in the Duggar family baby production/reality TV machine.</p>
<p>I realize this is College Confidential and I am about to utter heresy, but it is possible to succeed in life without going to college. Plenty of people do.</p>
<p>Check out the program they use for homeschooling, it’s pretty odd</p>
<p>And she alone is teaching all those kids, no wai, she has the older kids teach the younger ones, cutting into their own education, such as it is. And just because they speak well in front of a camera doesn’t mean they are educated. Yes, they can read and write and do math. Wow.</p>
<p>So much is for the camera. </p>
<p>Twenty babies is just bizarre. It’s like she’s a robot who has no idea how not to be pregnant. Regardless of whether they are taking public funds, to me mom has a sort of sickness, have a baby, get all this attention, and when the cuteness wears off, have another. Meantime, have your other kids do the laundry, clean the house, cook, potty train, teach, etc etc etc</p>
<p>Someone needs to teach that man how to put on a condom.</p>
<p>none of them attend college or any other post-high school educational program, nor will they be allowed, much less encouraged, to do so</p>
<p>You’re right, I don’t watch the show. I’ve seen bits and pieces while channel-surfing or when they’ve been featured on talk shows, magazines, and such.</p>
<p>But I highly doubt that when these kids are adults (and it appears that some already are…I think one is married???), then certainly the parents can not prevent them from going to college. I don’t know how this family is paid for the show, but I imagine that the adult kids must be getting some kind of compensation, therefore they have the money to go to college if they want. </p>
<p>If any of these kids had a sordid story to tell, don’t you think that a very willing media would give them air time or print space? Absolutely. Heck, if one of them was being prevented from going to college, I imagine that a quick call to the Enquirer would net the child a healthy 6 figure payment for an interview…and off that well-funded kid would be for college.</p>
<p>The few times that I’ve seen them speak, they seem normal to me. Remember, the definition of normal is broad. Their ways may not be your own (or mine!), but that doesn’t mean that they’re not normal. </p>
<p>*Quote:</p>
<h1>And, I don’t understand why people are upset that the parents expect the older kids to help out and do chores.</h1>
<p>There is a difference between “helping out” and being a substitute parent, which is what it seems like these kids are- parents to their younger siblings, not “helpers”. *</p>
<p>As someone who is the oldest D of 7 kids (and the younger ones were much younger), I guess you probably would have said that I did a LOT more than just “helping out.” I began changing diapers (the cloth ones with the BIG pins!) at age 5 1/2 when my sister was born…yep, five and a half! I was so excited to have a sister that I WANTED to take care of her.</p>
<p>I was a “junior mom” to all the younger ones, but especially to my youngest brother…heck his crib was in my bedroom! I am also his god-mother. Did I feel “put-upon” by helping raise my siblings? Heck no. I loved it. I loved taking care of them. </p>
<p>Since I went to regular school, I probably didn’t do as much for any one child as these kids do for their “buddy”. But, my cum effort of helping with all the younger ones over the years was significant. </p>
<p>Keep in mind that because these kids are home-schooled, these kids have a lot more non-school time than other kids. Many home-schoolers are done with school by noon…and that can include music lessons/practice.</p>
<p>Check out the program they use for homeschooling, it’s pretty odd</p>
<p>It may be odd or something that we’re not used to…but heck, our K-12 education system ain’t so hot that it is some kind of benchmark to be measured against. lol</p>
<p>I “get” that the creationist stuff gets a lot of attention and seems odd to those of us who don’t believe that the world is 7,000 years old or so…or whatever the number is. I have a couple of friends who believe in that. That said, their belief in THAT one area does not affect that they are smart in their professional fields…one is an engineer and one is a nurse anesthetist. People can have a religious belief that seems at odd with science, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t be effective in a challenging career or become highly educated. </p>
<p>Frankly, many of us probably hold onto beliefs that are at odds with other things that we believe or do.</p>
<p>Why any strangers including us here on CC have to “get it”. Family is not on taxpayer funded assistance. If you do not want to watch, do not watch it. If nobody watches, show will get cancelled. I do not watch it because it is boring. But most of TV is very boring to me, I use it primarily instead of sleeping pill. Everything that I like gets cancelled. My guess is since I do not care for this one, it will not get canleed any time soon, and I absolutely do not care. Actually I do not “get it” why others care so much.</p>
<p>mom2collegekids, I do not disagree with much you are saying, but I do think if you haven’t watched episode after episode you really might not have a good idea of how things run in that house.</p>
<p>Re: some of the children being adults. That’s subjective of course, but I would say that while they may be of age (over 18 for example) there are MANY ways that they are socially behind in years. Their world seems to very much be their actual house much of the time. Sure they take trips to the grocery etc., but really being out and social - not so much. </p>
<p>No doubt they are nice kids, well mannered for the camera (though the young ones seem a little wild for my standards - did you see the little one literally on top of the desk and trying to stand on top of the computer monitor the last show???!), but they are VERY MUCH controlled within the home. I cannot fathom any of them stepping away from the reigns of mom-dad and going to any media on their own. </p>
<p>So I’m just saying it’s one thing seeing them on the “surface” - an interview here and there and a few minutes of the show. But if you have followed them show after show (child after child) I think you DO get a little different perspective of how life is for the 19+ kids. Not saying it’s all bad or all good. But you do see the control of the home, the lack of freedom to do typical teenager things, etc. </p>
<p>and finally, re: #20 - I just really worry about the health of Michelle and her baby. And I wish she and her family would worry about that too.</p>
<p>These people think that they special and rewarded and in grace the more kids they have.
Birth control- just not an option.
A new pregnancy is to be celebrated.</p>
<p>p.s. the wiki on Quiverfull says that barrenness is a punishment, though accepted.
It ALSO says that there are exceptions on not being allowed to use birth control for women whose health does not support pregnancy. But no mention of unhealthy newborns…</p>
<p>How does this family pay for their health care, esp the ICU and ER stuff for poor Josie?</p>
<p>I worry about womens maternal health as well.
Optimally, you need to time to recuperate from pregnancy, childbirth & nursing before you should even think about getting pregnant again. ( & the older you are, the longer you need to recuperate )</p>
<p>My first child was “only” 10 weeks early & while she was remarkably healthy ( considering) and was discharged from the hospital before her due date, there are lifelong health impacts from being a very small baby, especially for children who have had to be readmitted after their initial discharge.</p>
<p>^Did you see her water skiiyng? None of the kids could, but she was holding there forever, pretty amazing. I guess, they wanted to make the show not so boring.<br>
I do not think that our worries about her helth can make any difference. She has her husband, mother, adult kids and other family members to worry about her. In addition she seems to be very strong headed woman to listen to anybody at all. These is her life with all consequences of her own decision making. She does not worry about us, why we worry about her? Don’t we have our own lives to worry about?</p>
<p>I don’t watch the show- but I am aware of current issues in women’s health & in particular how fetal/maternal health in this country compares unfavorably to fetal/maternal health in other countries.</p>
<p>It doesn’t take much time to be up on the issues.</p>
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<p>their motto is “buy used, save the difference”. They certainly don’t appear to want for anything–beautiful home that for that many people is clean, children are fed and clothed, everyone appears happy and well-adjusted. In my grandparents time, families had many children (maybe not 20, but 10-12 was not that unusual) and the kids jobs were to help out on the farm, help with house chores, etc. That was just the way it was and expected. You had many children to help run the household. My grandparents and aunts & uncles & cousins and down the line grew up to be very normal well-adjsuted people. The Duggars are not asking you to watch their program, not asking for public assistance, nor do I think they really care how we feel about their life. The children all seem very well adjusted and bright. It’s really none of our business.</p>
<p>“The Duggars are not asking you to watch their program”</p>
<p>Well, sure they are. Everyone who makes a living from a TV show asks you to watch. You don’t have to, of course, but that’s how they pay for the beautiful house and everything else. It’s a business. This is like saying that McDonald’s doesn’t ask you to eat their food. Of course they do. They issue the invitation, and you decide whether to accept.</p>
<p>Yes, they are not asking, and yes, Mcdonald does not either. We do not watch it, except when flipping thru trying to find something in very empty place. we also do not eat at McDonald, I would not eat there even for free. I have nothing aginst others watching the show and eating at Mcdonald, but you, Hanna, sound like we are forced and we are not, we exercise our free choice.</p>
<p>I was actually just wondering what their comments are on “why” they do the show. Seeing that they don’t have a television in their own house (or at least, the kids are not allowed to watch tv) what is their incentive (must have been some agenda initially besides just the $$) for publicizing their life on a medium (tv) they they apparently don’t believe in???</p>
<p>“you, Hanna, sound like we are forced and we are not, we exercise our free choice.”</p>
<p>How am I making it sound like we are forced when I stated “you decide whether to accept” the invitation to watch? How is that different from a free choice?</p>
<p>Seeing that they don’t have a television in their own house (or at least, the kids are not allowed to watch tv) what is their incentive (must have been some agenda initially besides just the $$) for publicizing their life on a medium (tv) they they apparently don’t believe in???</p>
<p>Good question.
Some people really limit outside media into their homes ( & sometimes this is dictated/recommended by their church), because they want tighter control over what sort of information they are exposed to. Fair & balanced isn’t their mindset, they only want " faith affirming" materials.
Fine & Dandy.
I don’t watch much tv myself & I certainly toss all my junk mail, don’t subscribe to newspapers or magazines although there are a few blogs & newspapers I read regularly online.</p>
<p>But using your own life ( and that of your family) as a source of information/entertainment for others does seem at odds with that value- although to use the Duggars as the example, they may have convinced themselves that using their 15 minutes to prosthelytize is doing the Lords work.</p>
<p>Maybe. ^^^ But yes, since they seem so value oriented, it does make me think a bit.</p>
<p>I remember the first time I saw them on TV - years ago -and probably 1/2 dozen kids ago - I was really quite angry. The whole “jurisdiction” business etc. - REALLY seemed to me to be like a form of slavery for the kids. After watching more, I did see that the kids were overall nice kids, and I didn’t see the work as quite disturbing. Now, as they get older and so many more babies have come, most of the girls seem to act as clones of their mom (right down to the hair) is again can be disturbing.</p>