Trying to change roommates, need advice!

<p>I am trying to change roommates and move into a different residence hall because I don't really click well with the people on my floor, and I don't really have any common ground them. I saw my RD, and he gave me a list of openings to choose a new roommate from. I went to each of these rooms to meet with these potential roommates, and none of them was what I'm looking for, but then I found a 8-person suite that looked pretty good. My roommate there would be a Japenese exchange student, but the other guys in the suite (at least the ones that were there when I saw it) seemed pretty cool and they seemed like the kind of guys I would want to hang out with and become friends with. The problem is, the roommate (the Japanese guy) said that a Japenese friend of his was on the waiting list before me, and that he would probably take the room. So I told my RD about this, and he e-mailed me the next day and said that "someone (not necessarily that friend) is coming to look at the room today, I'll let you know what the final verdict is". Then 2 days later the RD tells me that the room is mine if I want it, so I go back there - and the Japanese guy says that his friend is still trying to move in, but he doesn't know for sure yet. I then talked with a couple of the other guys in the suite about moving in, and they said that the guys there (expect possibly the Japenese guy) had known each other for 2 years, and that it might not work out for me. So I told them I'm not interested, thanks anyway, and it looked like that was that.</p>

<p>Well today I talked to the RA on my floor and told her all this, and she said that they (the roommate and the guys in that suite) were just making this stuff up because they already had their little "community", and they weren't open to having a new guy move in, but that eventually they would warm up to me and I would become close with those guys, and that I have to do this if I'm unhappy with my current situation, and that it would work out, just do it! But I really don't know if that's how it is in college when you change roommates a month into the year, and move into a suite with 6-7 guys who've already formed a bond during the last month or however long they've known each other. Is my RA right? If I move in to the suite, will the other guys eventually "accept" me and include me in their activities and stuff and let me be a part of their group? Or is this something that definetely won't work out based on what I said above? Keep in mind that I'm not really worried about having a Japanese exhange student as my roommate in this suite, since I would want to hang around the other guys most of the time, and besides one or two of the guys there said that this roommate isn't there a lot of the time because he does a lot of international stuff. FYI I'm a junior transfer student at UCSB, so I don't really know a lot about how social dynamics and stuff like that works in the dorms, especially in a situation like this. Please give me advice on this, I'd really appreciate it!</p>

<p>sound like jerks...i wouldn't want to room with them. don't know how to help, but i hope things work out.</p>

<p>Lucky you. Usually not having things in common with your old floormates wouldn't be a reason to move out. It's up to you. Seems like you want some confirmation. I'm pretty sure the new guys will warm up to you. Make junior friends in your major department.</p>


<p>on one hand you have 1 roommate that you don't get along with and on the other hand you have 7 that you might not get along with...if it were me, I'd take the odds and stay where I'm at...and did you ever think that maybe you're too picky??</p>

<p>UPDATE: I decided a couple weeks ago that I wouldn't move into that suite because overall it was too risky, not just because I wasn't sure if I'd get along with all the guys there, but also because my roommate would be a Japenese exchange student as I said, and that may have caused difficulties, plus if I had a regular American as a roommate chances are we would eventually become pretty close. Today I went back to the RD, this time with my roommate, who I discussed my situation with and said he would help me out (I don't have any problems with him), and the RD gave me a list of openings for the Winter Quarter. The difference is, this time these openings are of people who are graduating or leaving the school at the end of the quarter, rather than people who simply moved out because they requested a roommate change because perhaps they had problems, so maybe this batch of suites will be less risky, plus I have more faith this time. I think I'm just going to look at all of them, and then choose to move into the best one, because if I stay where I am now it will be pretty hard for me to make real good friends, and it seems like most people make at least one or two good friends in the dorms when they start college. Also, if I become friends with my roommates/suitemates, those friendships could be even better because it's a lot easier to bond with people when you're living in such close quarters and you're around them a lot of the time.</p>

<p>Any comments/advice?</p>

<p>Why exactly would having a Japanese exchange student as a roommate "cause difficulties"?</p>

<p>Just because we would have problems communicating since his English isn't that good (I already found it frustrating to communicate with him when I visited that suite), and I wouldn't be able to really socialize with him because of that and because he's new to our culture and just stuff like that. If I had a non-exchange student as a roommate, chances are I could bond with him and become pretty good friends.</p>

<p>Keep in mind people who graduated means you'll probably end up rooming with Jrs./Srs... which is an issue all to itself. About half of my friends frosh year were Jrs. and Srs. and it really really sucks when a) they're all at bars and your 18/19/20, and b) they all graduate and you have no friends left. After frosh year, it's a lot less easy to make new friends (which sucks, but it's true)</p>

<p>I think you expect too much out of the whole roommate situation. Your roommate does not have to be your instant best friend, in fact, chances are, he won't be. But that's okay. All you need is a roommate that is friendly, civil, and considerate. You can make friends outside of your suite, and most people do. It's just enough to have someone that is kind and respectful.</p>